Opioids 17 Days free of Methadone (How long to feel normal?)

[EatClenTrenHard]

Well everyone, it is with great shame and guilt that i admit i ruined everything. After using the first time, it ruined me. For everyone who thinks they can use just once and tell themelves no, you're probably wrong. I wouldve been ok most likely, but being hit with noro virus 3 days after a relapse, i was done.

Today is prob the 5th day in a row ive used sadly.. But its not all great now that im using. In fact, im starting LOW LOW LOW dose suboxone tomorrow for a week or two because all ive been doing is throwing up non stop for the past few days of using. To the point where im constantly extremeley thirsty, hinting at dehydration...

Today i woke up with dope withdrawals, and the panick/blood pressure alone was enough to make me pickup today. Tomorrow im going to force myself to take suboxone and begin a 2 week taper at 1 mg and less.

Please, please, if anyone has any advice or has fcked up like me, chip in..

IF i wouldve just never used the first time, i would still be sober. FUCK!!!!!!!!!!! 54 days opiate free. ruined.


If anything good comes from this, its hopefully that by the time i taper off suboxone, atleast the methadone withdrawals will be gone so that doesnt add on to all of this misery...

im sorry everyone.. especially to anyone who looked up to me for advice after making it so far. Just know that i couldve done it had i not given in to tempations. All it took was one buddy to catch me in the wrong thought process, with dope on him, offering it.

FUCK!


I refuse to go back on methadone or suboxone long term again, makes me want to just give up and die, ugh.

 

[Mr.Scagnattie]

^^

Why are you being so self-deprecating and repeatedly saying how you ruined everything? Using one time does not ruin everything and set you back to day one.. You're doing that to yourself by continuing to use. You would have been totally fine if you just picked up where you left off after your first relapse. You'll still be fine now (granted you have set yourself back a little by relapsing more times), but if you keep relapsing, you really will have ruined everything and be back to square one.. but you're the one causing that to happen now, it's not already set in stone. It will be though if you don't get it under control and stop feeling sorry for yourself.

 

[Fire&Water]

Wow...the mind can be a useless tool sometimes, eh ?

Fortunately I was prescribed short term dilaudid for methaDone (for pain) withdrawals - never (Done') again...