💀 The Abyss 💀 (Open 24hrs)

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lol you would probably make a hot dirty cop though

the whores would love you

you worship too many kids..

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I have this spidey bro I just let chill in my room with his little web and this fly flew into my room today was annoying the fuck outta me. I tried to chase it out of the room but it just kept buzzing around like an asshole. But then it flew into the web and it was awesome watching my bro just spin that little fuck into a cocoon to eat. Thanks spidey bro.
 
I miss NL....................................... I wanna go clubbing on some quality X again, god damn it, I miss those good times. This was the viral hit going on when I first moved there 5 years ago:

 
Aargh fuck. It's 5.30 am. I hate my flat. Yet again I feel I've lost everyone and everything. It's amazing how no amount of repetition makes this mood any less nasty. It's still good as new.
Please indulge me: this IS "the abyss". I look so awful at the moment. It's vain, I know. Also I've been knocking back at least a bottle of wine a day, every day, for about 3 months. I guess it's not irreparable ... Sleep, eat, less booze...no-one who has last night's stale plonk for breakfast, plus a cigarette, before sinking back into bullshit land under the blankets until need for more booze is critical .... er, messy sentence. Start again.
Start again. No-one who Iives like this is going to be crackling with energy, or looking very well.
Get up, get up! What for? Why?
There's nothing to do but "tidy" my shitty flat. which is really only a squat - un-carpeted floors, rooms missing doors, ex-partners crap still everywhere..it'll still look like shit whether tidied or not. Even my cat's divorced me and taken up with the neighbour...
Haven't seen my daughter since January. She is 17. My poverty, combined with her father's disgusting manoeuvres (eg, stopped bring her to see me four years ago to evade paying me child support, all in defiance of court orders etc but shut up let's not get into the family court shit!!!! )

The other day my lovely daughter rang me for the first time in ages and I was too scared to answer, because I didnt want her to sound how flat and dead I felt. I just couldn't imagine what I could say to her. Yet she's my fucking daughter, whom I brought up entirely alone until she was 6!

It is ridiculous.

I need employment, that's what I really need. For last two years have been completely unemployed, and about 8 months of the two years have been spent in hospital. Since 2017, I've broken both my arms, my toe, a finger, and most recently my knee. The latter happened during fight with ex - oh, it's too horrible to go into, that angle. He didn't break the knee - I did it trying to climb down balcony from 3rd floor, but I was running away from him. I was lucky to only get a broken knee - it was a 50 foot fall! In hospital I was told repeatedly how lucky I was to be neither dead nor a quadriplegic.

What am I doing with this second chance?

Pissing it away and fucking about.

I NEED a JOB.

Can anyone advise me as to how to get into something like content-writing? I realis this particular prose effort (assuming anyone's still reading) is crap, of course. But I have written one book (ten years ago!) plus quite a few articles, and more recently, some quasi-blogging which occasionally people like. I'm good with copywriting, have some experience in advertising. Prepared to settle for humble $$$. Don't care if I get no acknowledgement.

It's more about the OBLIGATION. I need the obligation. I need to have people expecting me to get shit done or else. I need a reason to get outta bed!!!'

Suggestions of any sort are welcome. Even seedy ones, like writing other people's Uni essays (I have PhD).... creating dating profiles for busy professionals (?..master/slave contracts? did one year of law!) ..,.health and beauty ....captions for cat porn ...,yoga ... reviews of all of the above, fake testimonials ...

Thanks ..,,
 
Tl;Dr

I bet this isn't something a little IV diamorphine couldn't fix?
 
I have this spidey bro I just let chill in my room with his little web and this fly flew into my room today was annoying the fuck outta me. I tried to chase it out of the room but it just kept buzzing around like an asshole. But then it flew into the web and it was awesome watching my bro just spin that little fuck into a cocoon to eat. Thanks spidey bro.
Spidey Bros are my fav Bros.


Thankfully we don't get the brown recluse / black widow types up this way often
 
Tl;Dr

I bet this isn't something a little IV diamorphine couldn't fix?
If thou takes up my woe in this vein, with light jests
of fabled physic, this then be thy pleasure,
Convey it hence in full measure, but think me imperious not
If say to ye, brave thane, that my words become me
As my wounds. They smack of honor NOT!
All this the world knows,,yet none knows well:
to shun the heaven that leads men to this hell

Ps I tried to keep it in iambic pentameter for you, lovey. It's pretentious but there's worse things than being pretentious.
 
Mine brother just called to say he left stash of Dex here in an empty cigarette box. Guided by his voice on the phone I've just torn my place to pieces, broken several ornaments, knocked a fingernail off, and gone through the trash (in case - in a fuckheaded gesture, I'd lost my mind and decided to chuck empty cig boxes in the trash - it's a destructive habit I've got, trying to put rubbish in bins).

I love him but WHY can't he keep his shit in a nice plastic jar with a childproof lid? Typically he puts his shit (as in drugs) inside other shit (as in rubbish) .... empty match boxes, empty cig cartons, the bottom of bags with holes .... Have offered him medicinal jars, but he spurns them. Claims that cops are more like to question him about a pill jar, but it'll all be cool bananas when they see 50 or 100 grubby tablets rolling around the bottom of his backpack ...plus empty baggie.

This actually did happen to him once. He'd passed out on some pissy mattress in the "red light district". When he awoke in 43 degree heat (105, in American), two red cop faces were bearing down on his, asking: "this your ganja mate?" and waving cannabis at him. Well yeah, my bro said, and then cops are like, "this all you got mate?".
It wasn't all my brother had by any means.To his horror they attacked his bag which had huge stash of un prescribed Dex and Endone, just rattlin' loose, plus the deal bags they'd come in: one marked "D" and the other "Oxy"

To his bafflement, far from asking questions, cops got busy putting the Dex and Endone BACK in the deal-bags for him, making comments like, "you're gonna lose your meds mate ... be more careful eh?"

And that was that, "on way your mate", "take it easy", "it's all good" ....

He's never recovered from this. It seems to have proven to him that putting yer stash IN a secure containers - particularly a pill bottle - is a dubious move that will attract cops' animosity.
 
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