molly897
Bluelighter
a few months ago I od'd on 1800mg of Wellbutrin, 10mg of Xanax (i took this when i ate my klonopin script too early), 30mg ambien, and like 30mg silenor (doxepin). yes this was an intentional OD. i started tripping hardcore about 5-7 hours later and thought i was seeing ghosts. i did not associate this behavior with an OD. my husband and i went to sleep. in the morning i woke up convulsing and experiencing bouts of dystonia-like symptoms, opisthotonus. everything turned a yellow hue and lights were too bright to see. my husband called an ambulance because i couldn't move or respond to anything. i later found out that the only reason i didn't die from the wellbutrin was because of all the xanax i ate
when the ambulance got there i was still in shock, unable to move, tight muscle cramping and spasms, and they knew right away i ODd on benzos atleast because of my pupils being the size of saucers, and me being unresponsive. i get to the hospital, given a bag of saline fluid and just like the other 6 times i've been hospitalized, was fine after that. but then they sent me to psych. those mother fuckers wanted to have me committed against mine and my husbands will. i guess in the state of NY you can do that (i'm now back home in FL for school), or maybe it's all states and i don't know. my husband had to convince them i wasn't crazy and i had to convince them my years of depression, diagnosis' and feelings weren't real, and that it was a one time episode. they called my therapist and she said to have me put in the detox program (she until then presumably had no idea i was abusing my pills, though everytime she gave me klonopin she gave me an anti seizure medication). i thought it was over for me then, i felt like susanna in girl interrupted. but my husband convinced them and i went home to endure two weeks of cold turkey withdrawals.
yes i had a seizure. nothing big like a grand mal but i definnitely had a seizure. it was the most excruciating pain of my life, the beginning of the WDs. i couldn't move, smell, taste, hear, eat, smile. i just wanted to die. i had more episodes because i'm borderline as well so it happens and those were much worse due to the already intensified symptoms of the disorder. it didn't get better for two weeks. after the first week i could walk around, but i still wanted to die. i hadn't had any klonopin in a week after being on 10mg for a month, and having been building that up for a year and a half. i was given some muscle relaxants from my husbands dads friend which really helped alot for the cramping, but mentally my motor skills were shot.
the itching sensations were unbearable and didn't go away. i couldn't sleep at night because it was so bad. i tried getting drunk because that's common in benzo WD but it didn't help. finally at the end of the first week, my husband got ahold of some xanax as we both realized doing this cold turkey wasn't going to happen. but when i ate the xanax it made my symptoms WORSE. i know, a sedative making you have worse muscle crampings and spasms? turns out i was overdosing and withdrawaling from the wellbutrin (i know this because when i took a small dose of my wellbutrin, i felt FINE) . i had been on wellbtruin or 5 months, taking more than i was prescribed as i didn't know 600mg was pushing it. but i wouldn't take it everyday, and for that entire time period i felt fatigued, sick, disconnected with life. i blamed it on WDing from klonopin. but the entire time i had been withdrawaling from the antidepressant as i was taking so much of it one day, skipping a few days, taking it another day, not taking it for a WEEK, and then trying to fix the feelings by making myself addicted to my anxiety medication. what a horrible road that was
this all happened in june. lost my job at victoria's secret cause of it, but i haven't felt this normal since before i even smoked weed
i never thought i'd feel like that again! weed really fucked me up too, and i quit that when I was wding. i smoke some legal stuff now, and some real stuff from time to time, but i gotta say off topic the RC in fake shit fucks you up!
i hope everyone that was on their way to recovery have or are still trying and i hope those who werent trying, are trying now
xox
when the ambulance got there i was still in shock, unable to move, tight muscle cramping and spasms, and they knew right away i ODd on benzos atleast because of my pupils being the size of saucers, and me being unresponsive. i get to the hospital, given a bag of saline fluid and just like the other 6 times i've been hospitalized, was fine after that. but then they sent me to psych. those mother fuckers wanted to have me committed against mine and my husbands will. i guess in the state of NY you can do that (i'm now back home in FL for school), or maybe it's all states and i don't know. my husband had to convince them i wasn't crazy and i had to convince them my years of depression, diagnosis' and feelings weren't real, and that it was a one time episode. they called my therapist and she said to have me put in the detox program (she until then presumably had no idea i was abusing my pills, though everytime she gave me klonopin she gave me an anti seizure medication). i thought it was over for me then, i felt like susanna in girl interrupted. but my husband convinced them and i went home to endure two weeks of cold turkey withdrawals.
yes i had a seizure. nothing big like a grand mal but i definnitely had a seizure. it was the most excruciating pain of my life, the beginning of the WDs. i couldn't move, smell, taste, hear, eat, smile. i just wanted to die. i had more episodes because i'm borderline as well so it happens and those were much worse due to the already intensified symptoms of the disorder. it didn't get better for two weeks. after the first week i could walk around, but i still wanted to die. i hadn't had any klonopin in a week after being on 10mg for a month, and having been building that up for a year and a half. i was given some muscle relaxants from my husbands dads friend which really helped alot for the cramping, but mentally my motor skills were shot.
the itching sensations were unbearable and didn't go away. i couldn't sleep at night because it was so bad. i tried getting drunk because that's common in benzo WD but it didn't help. finally at the end of the first week, my husband got ahold of some xanax as we both realized doing this cold turkey wasn't going to happen. but when i ate the xanax it made my symptoms WORSE. i know, a sedative making you have worse muscle crampings and spasms? turns out i was overdosing and withdrawaling from the wellbutrin (i know this because when i took a small dose of my wellbutrin, i felt FINE) . i had been on wellbtruin or 5 months, taking more than i was prescribed as i didn't know 600mg was pushing it. but i wouldn't take it everyday, and for that entire time period i felt fatigued, sick, disconnected with life. i blamed it on WDing from klonopin. but the entire time i had been withdrawaling from the antidepressant as i was taking so much of it one day, skipping a few days, taking it another day, not taking it for a WEEK, and then trying to fix the feelings by making myself addicted to my anxiety medication. what a horrible road that was
this all happened in june. lost my job at victoria's secret cause of it, but i haven't felt this normal since before i even smoked weed
i never thought i'd feel like that again! weed really fucked me up too, and i quit that when I was wding. i smoke some legal stuff now, and some real stuff from time to time, but i gotta say off topic the RC in fake shit fucks you up!i hope everyone that was on their way to recovery have or are still trying and i hope those who werent trying, are trying now
xox
