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Benzos Quick Question About Xanax

kanyeknievel

Bluelighter
Joined
Jul 12, 2010
Messages
535
Soo I have a quick question. I've been on Kpin about 1mg as of a year ago and i went down to .5 mg and ive been on that does and switched to valium and back to kpin but ive been at the equivelncy of that does for atleast haf a year or so now.

But the past few months I'd say I was buying xanax from a friend and taking them in large amounts at times then smoking weed. cause thats the only time i smoked. then the last 2 months or 3 i took like 2 bars or more at night and smoked.. or not even and slept. then i realized that this would be habit forming and probably be really bad if i kept it up and i decided to stop and not buy them anymore and stop doing this.. and since school/college is starting and i dont wanna be smoking now anyways, it would be a good time to do that.. plus i dont wanna be used to that dose of xanax and not be on it.

Anyways, last night was the night I didnt take any, but i took PM tylenol pills and stuff and i was anxious for school and always when there is something anxious provoking the next day, i always have trouble sleeping and thats what happened last night.. but im thinking the xanax played a part in that too. I realized i ahd to get up earlier and i couldnt fall asleep and as the time kept going and i couldnt sleep and i kept thinking i had less and less time to sleep that made me more anxious.. i eventually slept, but i only slept for maybe like 2 hours or less at a time and im tired as shit right now.

Im guessing that i was getting used to that does of xanax and that it was a very good time for me to stop getting the xanax before i got TOO used to taking them and i had to stay on a dose liek that or i would go into bad withdrawal right? Im going ot just stick with my kpins now.. i get 90 .5s a month.. i only take 30 if that.. i might need to take 1 a day with the 5mg a valium due to the xanax that i've had, and weed myself back down to my normal dose of kpin.. but i think cause of my xanax and smoking that this happened , but i think if i kept doing this i would havent devloped a need and phsyical addiction to them.

So do you guys think i picked the right time to stop, or the perfect time? I know i should have stopped earlier.. i was planning to but i am now. Im sure that im feeling some insomnia effects from not taking that at night now, but ill have my klonopin to so i dont withdrawal or anything.. i dont get a refill until 2 weeks or so, so i can only take my 5mg of valium plus .5 mg of klonopin each day.. which is fine for me.. kind of sucks i put myself in here. but im happy that i didnt keep going with this and i realized that If I kept going this could have gotten SO much worse and I could be going through HELL if i kept it going.

So i guess my question was that because i didnt have the xanax for the first time i didnt sleep well and that i prob wont sleep that great for a few days or so, but ill be fine with my kpin and valium. just dont get anymore xanax correct?
Thanks :D

EDIT: oh and this last month I realised that I was making a habit of it and taking like a bar or so each night and i wanted to get rid of it quicker so i didnt make a habit of it so I took a few bars at a time to get rid of them fast too
 
You take a lot of benzos, and they're all cross tolerant...

Yes i realize that they cross tolerant and I noticed I took a lot. but I only took Klonpin prescribed.. which i wish i never took in the first place.. but yeah i used to take 1mg for a few months and then i brought myself down to .5 and then a few months ago i started to buy xanax on and off from a friend so i could smoke and throughout the summer i pretty much had them and took them at night. Anxiety wise ive been fine during the day and everything with my dose of kpin and valium..

I got on vaium because I was planning on getting off of benzos all together, but once I started working I got more anxiety and stress and I couldnt do it.. so im prescribed 5mg of valium which i do take and im presceibed 90 .5mg of kpins and i take .25mg kpin usually with 5mg of valium in the morning and thats it. But, now because of this i think ill need to take a little extra kpin if i need to, to sleep mostly until im back in my normal arrangment.

I know i take a lot of benzos. I honestly wish I could go back and never have took them in the first place. I went on them because i thought getting them for my depersonalization would help my DP alot, it might've but its just given me a lot more problems it the long run and getting off of them is just going to be a lot worse. I plan to get off of them, I WANT to get off of them, and I WILL get off of them.

BUT for now I just want some support or responses such as : yeah you shouldnt have taken all those xanax, it was good you got off of them now but your gonna feel more anxious and what not for a few days or whatever but you wont be that bad since you have your kpins and valium.

Which i think is right, im hoping for that response but im not getting anymore xanax thats for sure.

edit: btw, ive never had any problems with anxiety or any other issues during the day or anything taking my kpin and valium. I should NOT get anymore xanax right? Or is it a better idea to get xanax and taper? I think its better to just not get them and just stay on my kpins and valium and just deal with whatever anxiety i have from this. I think today i just feel more anxious cause i didnt sleep well at all last night
 
Solid advice, thats what I was planning on doing. I got the last script from the person and i was like shit... i dont wanna get too habitual of this, so i took them quickly and more at a time than normal; and i said this is the last time i buy it.. i just didnt know if it was a better idea to get more and taper for some reason. but yeah i think ill be fine since i have benzos of my own

Also using Kava kava root powder to help
 
That would be a terrible idea, yes in the long term. Right now.. no. If i stopped all my benzos right now id go into very bad physical and mental withdrawal and i would prob have a seizure and could die. thats terrible advice.
I want to and plan to get off of them as soon as i can. i want to, its hard.
if you have been on a benzo for a year and got off of them, ill listen, otherwise you don't know that its hard.
 
So you pasted a wall of text that basically says "hey I take a fuckload of benzos, when I take xanax it makes me feel shitty though, should I take more xanax?" What do you think the answer is? I personally enjoy making myself feel shitty all the time.

This thread makes my head hurt. Try a diazepam taper. It's hard indeed but it's a lot easier if you develop some way of dealing with anxiety aside from either freaking out or taking pills.
 
if you get paradoxical effects from xanax, why don't you stop? ^diazepam taper would be best, but klonopin works well too...
 
Wait no you missed the point i think. I asked if I should get xanax to taper for some reason, i thought that was a stupid idea but just brought it up incase one of you thought that would be a good idea.

But no i got a little out of hand with the xanax over the summer with smoking, i didnt take a shit ton and i ahvent taken it for a year, but ive been on klonopin, a low dose. .5 for a year or so. And trust me I've learned to deal with my anxiety a lot this whole time.

It is hard getting off of them, I wish i didnt get on them cause now that I look back I really didn't HAVE ANXIETY too much or really at all to begin with, i just had a skewed view on what anxiety was.. now i know. But I go to a therapist every week and I deal with my anxiety and i've learned a lot of the year.. the xanax yeah over board i know, but i just plan to get back to my regular dose. then from there, hopefully get off of the klonopin and just on the valium 5mg. then off of that completely.

I am suppose to take 5mg valium thats it, but when i started working in the summer i had more anxiety and stress in the first couple weeks i couldnt take it so i took half of a .5... which is .25mg and that worked so i just stuck with that, and the xanax was just to smoke basically.

ANYWAYS. I was only asking you guys pretty much if I was smart to stop taking the xanax and to go to my normal dose and if I didnt sleep last night because i didnt have xanax and if itll be a few days or so before im back in my original groove.(I havent been taking xanax EVERY DAY but most) Yes i have been learning to deal with my anxiety, i wish i never took any benzos but i cant look at it that way. I have and now im dealing with the consequences.
 
wait...what?? you asked if it was smart to stop xanax, but obviously it doesn't matter what "we" think because you have already stopped. don't knock it before you try it is my advice...
 
Actually, you know what? Fuck this. I just decided I really need to man up and I need to get the fuck off of these things right now. I'm going to go through the pain of withdrawal at one point and the longer I wait its just going to get worse and harder to get off.

Okay so with that in my mind and I'm serious about this... what should I do? How should I go about doing this. Considering I was on that xanax binge how long should I wait until I notice or feel like I'm back to my regular dosages? And then from there, i think I should wait a little bit at that does then go to just the valium then go down on the valium. But how long should I draw out the valium for? I've been on valium for about 4 months, 5months or so right now. i went from 10mg to 5mg. and ive been on klonopin for a year.. or has it been 2 years holy shit did i forget like a whole year?... no its been...wow i dont even know to be honest... a year and a half or two years.. wow.
Anyways, yeah.. i want to do this.

Sorry for all the confusion and frustration in this thread already, but i really want to get off of this shit and i dont want to keep being on it.. i really dont. I want to have it and take it on days i might need it if im really anxious but thats it. I never planned for me to be addicted to it and have to take it everyday. God damnit i hate my life
 
Maybe you should sit down and put your thoughts in order before making a rash decision? Your plan sounds good but there is also the psychological aspect of addiction you should deal with.

The longer you draw your taper out, the longer you will feel "off", conversely with a shorter taper it will be more intense. Luckily you're not taking much in the way of benzos but it's still significant. Try a 3-6 month taper.

We have a couple threads on benzo w/d and dependence on Bluelight, use the search engine. I suggest making a thread in The Dark Side if you would like some support in coming off benzodiazepines because this really isn't the place for it.
 
Maybe you should sit down and put your thoughts in order before making a rash decision? Your plan sounds good but there is also the psychological aspect of addiction you should deal with.

The longer you draw your taper out, the longer you will feel "off", conversely with a shorter taper it will be more intense. Luckily you're not taking much in the way of benzos but it's still significant. Try a 3-6 month taper.

We have a couple threads on benzo w/d and dependence on Bluelight, use the search engine. I suggest making a thread in The Dark Side if you would like some support in coming off benzodiazepines because this really isn't the place for it.

Yes, thank you. No, I don't plan to do it very fast and quick. I know I am not on a high dose, but still a decent dose that will bring out psychological problems I know this. I am a Psychology major and I am really good at it.. I am not at the medication part yet but I am good at all this and I've been through Opiate withdrawal and I've been through withdrawal of benzos somewhat before and I know how bad it can be.. but not to the extent of getting off of it fully.

I just wanted to make a statement on here and to myself that I am getting off of these. If you ever watched the movie The Secret, it says tell yourself what you Want, believe what you Want, if you BELIEVE what you WANT you will recieve, no matter what you have to do to get there. Im telling myself I WANT to be off of benzos and i will be off of them.

What i plan to do is this, I have a psycitrast appointment Friday, who prescribes me the Valium, we origianlly were going to taper but I didnt like him caus he wanted to taper on HIS TERMS and at HIS SPEED and i didnt like that so I told him stay at 5mg and we've been at that for a few months. So im going to go to him and just stay at the dose, or bring it up to him that I want to start tapering off and have it last 3-6 months, longer the better imo. If not I will wait till I get a better Psyc.

I have a therapist appointment that I go to every Thursday, I'm going to tell her that I want to start to taper down off my my benzos and see what she thinks I should do and how long I should do it in and alll that. She is really good.

I am also going to ask my teacher tommorow, who I can tell anything, he used to be a therapist and he is my Psyc teacher and he would know a good answer.

So i am going to ask all three of them, but mostly just two of them. I want to wait atleast a month before doing this.. so i can get back to my normal dose and regim.. since i probably need some time to recover from the xanax and get back to my regular dose.
What sucks is, I got on kpin for Depersonalizaton, and i shouldnt have gotten on it, and i got on it cause i over thought DP too much and thats what kept it going for so long.. and just a few days ago when i took xanax and smoked I had a breakthrough, like a snap of like back to reality.. it was like scary for a few minutes but i felt like normal, not completely but almost back to myself.. i was so happy at the time. So i know that its my anxiety thats causing it to stay, it is a symptom of anxiety. And ever since that happened I've become a strong believer in that WANT, BELIEVE, RECIEVE.. cause i wanted that and i believed it and i receieved it... even for a little, but i felt it and i know its there. so im gonna keep that mentality for everything else.

Edit: I dont want to post anymore hahah damn. 4 is my lucky number 444 even luckier :p
 
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Had to break the 444 post :(.

I went to my pysc today who prescribes me Suboxone, Valium 5mg, and he prescribes me Cymbalta... i never trusted Anti-deprestants ever since he gave me Lexapro about a year or so ago and it made me like suicidal thinking and a lot worse. But i tried it and after like 4 weeks i didnt feel better so I stopped taking it. I didn't tell him I stopped taking it cause I don't want him to not prescribe me the Suboxone, because he is the only psyc around that ik that will prescribe me suboxone and i know will keep me on it.

Anyways, my lack of sleep the past couple days has been killing me and making me more anxious and irrtitable.. its been getting better but I've always had sleeping problems, as in I have to take like tylenol PM, a good maount and like melatonin to sleep and still its hard for me to sleep then. ( i remember first getting on suboxone i slept from just hte suboxone.. that was nice). I told him I had trouble sleeping and more anxiety from school starting and my dad said that as well and he prescribed me Hydroxizne. I forgot the mg but I read it is used for some anxiety, sleeping, and alcohol withdrawal?

So i think this Hydroxizine is a perfect medication for me to sleep with, cause I do have anxiety when I sleep, like some anxiety or a pressure about having to fall asleep cause i need to sleep and get up for school the next day. So im happy he prescribed me it, just wanted to ask if this was a good medication. I dont want to look into it really, everytime i get a medication I look at all the details and my anxiety thinks that all the side-effects are happening to me, even if they probably arent, just cause i read that they could happen. So im not going to read side-effects, to show i'm improving on my anxiety. but i was just asking if this was a good medication to prescribe to help me sleep at night.
 
I know I am not on a high dose, but still a decent dose that will bring out psychological problems I know this. I am a Psychology major and I am really good at it.

lol hate psych majors for this reason. Just messing with you :D but yes, the xanax you took just put your tolerance out of whack and now you have slight withdrawal effects. I'd avoid a taper for now until you have stabilized on your current dose. Protracted withdrawals suck.

hydroxyzine is a good medication, I love antihistamines. It will also potentiate your benzos and bupe, not bad.

The idea to take xanax to smoke cannabis wasn't the greatest one, but why are you concerned about not getting high when you are on benzos anyway? If there's one class of drugs that will fuck your cognitive abilities, it's benzodiazepines. Either way, stay away from xanax, it'll just fuck up your tolerance and cause withdrawals when you have to go back to your regular dose.

and why go on benzos for DP? Did a Dr actually recommend that? I never had DP (not double penetration) before I got addicted to benzos and now i'm not even sure if it'll ever go away. NOTE: It will go away, i just mean in my case it seems like it's neverending, however this is my perception of it and this is not necessarily the case for anyone else or even myself :D a further note: benzo withdrawal will cause DP in many cases, this is why I'm confused as to why a Dr. would prescribe it for DP, knowing that it will cause DP itself during the withdrawal. Nevertheless, i understand your point, i'm not intending to scare anyone.
 
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lol hate psych majors for this reason. Just messing with you :D but yes, the xanax you took just put your tolerance out of whack and now you have slight withdrawal effects. I'd avoid a taper for now until you have stabilized on your current dose. Protracted withdrawals suck.

hydroxyzine is a good medication, I love antihistamines. It will also potentiate your benzos and bupe, not bad.

The idea to take xanax to smoke cannabis wasn't the greatest one, but why are you concerned about not getting high when you are on benzos anyway? If there's one class of drugs that will fuck your cognitive abilities, it's benzodiazepines. Either way, stay away from xanax, it'll just fuck up your tolerance and cause withdrawals when you have to go back to your regular dose.

and why go on benzos for DP? Did a Dr actually recommend that? I never had DP (not double penetration) before I got addicted to benzos and now i'm not even sure if it'll ever go away.

Well so you know for future reference im going to state this since you dont know about it.. and so you dont scare the shit out of people that DO have it and are very anxious and DONT know about it and worry about it. IT ALWAYS GOES AWAY. DO NOT EVER say that to someone that it doesnt go away. They will think that its true, even if its not and that will cause them to just worry about it even more, that could even ruin their lives. I would edit that post or delete that incase some that does have it reads it. everyone that has it, it always goes away.. its not always the same length of time that it goes away but its always does away. its ONLY ONLY ONLY a symptom of anxiety, THATS IT. thats all it is, thats why i got on benzos for it and i thought it would stop it. I did my final on DP for my Intro to Psyc on DP and my teacher, who had it at the same age from weed, just like it did, and his went away after 2 years or less, he gave me i think it was 100 because it was that good.
But just saying you should edit or delete that, but never say that again to someone that has it or mentions it.. because the reason they have it is because they have anxiety and if u say that their anxiety is going to cause them to look at that and be even MORE anxious and worry 10000x more that they will NEVER recover and they will be like that for the rest of their lives. Which is 100% not true at all. So in all, its not true, it goes away in every case. I've met people and talked to people and have a friend who even had it and its gone away, you can refute that either.

But yeah i read that it does sorta potentaite suboxone and benzos sorta so thatll be good for me sleeping and my anxiety. So i think it was a good medication to prescribe me. And yeah I didnt know much about benzos, acutally i didnt know anything about them besides they could fuck u up before i got on them. I bet i could be a lot more productive and my brain would be a lot more productive and have more cognitive functionality if i didnt take benzos, i bet its been slowing me down a lot and i dont even realize it cause ive been on it for a year and half.
But i took the xanax so i COULD smoke because i had ANXIETY (like i said anxiety causes DP), and the anxiety made me not enjoy weed. and the xanax made the anxiety go away and i smoked and could enjoy it more. But im not going to take it anymore, and im going to get back down to my normal doseages and stablize myself back to where I was and when I go back to my psyc next month on the 11th I am going to say I want to taper down, as long as I am back to where I was am i am comfortable with where I am at and i have no problems with sleeping, etc.

But again, for the sake of others that have dp that dont know much about it and worry alot, dont tell them it will never go away.. it always goes away. I can see you didn't know that, but now you do. I just dont want you or anyone else saying that to people with it and having them being terrible depressed because of it. hell even that kinda worried me for a second, but i know better so it didnt bother me. but i just know how it is to be really scared and worry all the time and to read something like, if i was at where i was a year ago, that would have killed me inside and all my hope.
 
shoulda dealt with the xanax withdrawl k-pin and valium last longer(there for the wd last longer but o well i know i know its living hell ever since i stopped my 3 mg of kpin a day i have seizures now sucks big time.
 
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