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What chance do I have? 21 year old w/ brain damage

C

catching fish

Bluelighter
Joined
Jun 23, 2011
Messages
280
I'll try to be blunt here, because I don't have an ounce of energy at the moment.

I used to binge drink on the weekends for the last few years. When I drank, I went hard, often going into blackouts and waking up still intoxicated. I could gradually feel my short term memory going to shit, but other than that my brain power was fairly decent (I used to be extremely bright). At the end of last year/start of this year, I was on a trip to Europe and I was drinking very hard. One morning I woke up and felt like I had a lobotomy. I felt very different, and alot slower. I had trouble thinking, concentrating, reasoning, and so forth. When I returned home, I abstained from drinking alcohol. I would occasionally have a few beers, but when I woke up I would always feel super faded. Fast forward to now, or 6 weeks ago actually. My brain was doing ok. I was keeping up with university work, I was able to enjoy watching complex films, and I was doing pretty good.

However, it was my brother's 18th birthday. And I STUPIDLY got drunk. It wasn't like I was blackout drunk, but I was pretty drunk. I probably had about 12 drinks or something. When I woke up I felt way out of it. At first I thought it was just a regular hangover, but as the days past the brain fog and cognitive dysfunction remained. I can't concentrate, my short term memory has is virtually non-existant, and I can't think straight. I can barely even watch films. I also feel completely numb. I have no emotions, except for a lingering sadness that I have ruined my life. I can't even laugh. After I fell into a deep depression, I went back to my GP in hopes of getting a referral to a neurologist or something and maybe getting an MRI scan to determine the scope of the damage, but he says brain damage caused by alcohol won't come up on an MRI.

So now I'm back on lexapro, and struggling with what I am certain is brain damage. And what I have gathered from my online research is that this shit is irreversible. I'm in a very bad place right now, and the thought of this being my new life is something that I can't deal with. If anybody has anything to share, or has experience something like this before, please post here. By the way, I am completely sober now. I'm off drinking for good.
 
I have experienced this fog you speak of.

Wiki depersonalization/derealization. Depersonalization most all the time comes along with anxiety and depression. I highly doubt it is brain damage. Take the proper steps like eating healthy, not drinking, taking supplement (fish oil, b vitamins, 5htp theres a bunch of good ones) and excercising and you will eventually get yourself out of the fog.
 
I'd recommend against taking 5-htp regularly (due to risk of heart issues down the road), but otherwise this ^^ is very sound advice. The brain is surprisingly plastic, and as long as you're able to keep clean then you may well recover in time. It may take a while, but clean living over time is very regenerative. Don't give up hope just yet.
 
Cognitive dysfunction ("cog fog") is a really common symptom when stopping GABA drugs, it will go away after you abstain form drinking for a while. I highly doubt you have any type of permanent brain damage, your body is just trying to tell you to stop drinking.
 
Like mentioned, I wouldn't think it's likely that your few years of drinking has caused permanent damage. If you're no longer drinking then you're doing the best thing you can for yourself to recover from whatever impairment you are experiencing. Do the best you can to take care of yourself :) Things have a way of improving even if it doesn't seem like they will at first.
 
You should be fine, it was alcohol. If it had been MDMA and even a small fraction of the usage you were doing, then i would be worried.
 
F1n1shed said:
You should be fine, it was alcohol. If it had been MDMA and even a small fraction of the usage you were doing, then i would be worried.
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I might be misunderstanding your comments but if you're insinuating that alcohol is safer than MDMA, this is entirely untrue and quite the opposite. Alcohol is literally a poison, and if taken at high levels for prolonged periods of time can cause MASSIVE damage to all parts of the body. MDMA is obviously harmful if abused, but at low doses or if taken relatively infrequently, it is actually pretty safe. I hope you don't mind me picking up on your comments but after all, the purpose of this entire website is to promote safe use of drugs and to provide accurate drug information.


catching fish, the best thing you can do is to lay off all drugs especially alcohol for a good long while. The good news is that it is very unlikely that you've done any permanent damage (despite whatever you have read on the internet). However it can take a little while for our brains to recover from the damage incurred from substance abuse. Living a healthy lifestyle will speed up the recovery process, e.g. eat fresh healthy food, drink plenty of water, get plenty of good quality sleep every night, and try to fit in at least 4 sessions of moderate exercise every week. Please go back to your doctor if you are still concerned but just remember that over time you WILL get back to normal :)
 
Thanks for your responses everyone. I forgot to add that I also used to use MDMA and amphetamines around 2 years ago, and I am certain they were involved in the degradation of my short term memory. However I quit them long enough ago to be fairly sure of the extent of the damage caused by them. Alcohol on the other hand... Drinking like a maniac every weekend for 3 years has taken it is toll. I really hope you guys are right when you say that I will improve. It has been over 6 weeks since my last fateful alcohol binge and I am yet to start recovering. I'd trade my left nut, and possibly my right if I could get my mind back. I am currently taking some supplements like fish oil and vitamins, but my diet leaves alot to be desired.

The symptoms I describe are the worst when I first wake up in the morning. Everyday I wake up and I am so out of it I can't even function. I generally have no idea what date it is, what my plans are for the day, and I usually just sit on my bed blankly until I slowly come to.
 
It sounds to me like you have either depression or dissociation, but not actual brain damage. I woke up one day after first using pot and felt like I had gone insane - I couldn't think, I felt lethal and depressed, and basically had everything you described. It went away after some weeks and I know I need to stay away from pot! It was dissociation in the end.

I think if you had suffered brain damage from alcohol it would be much more severe than what you've described. Like you would be a total vegetable, so that everyone you know would be saying "what the fuck is wrong with you" and you may not even be able to reflect on the change. As it is, I think that although you may have some memory loss and cognitive blurriness, you probably have depression/dissociation.
 
catching fish said:
I am currently taking some supplements like fish oil and vitamins, but my diet leaves alot to be desired.
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This is great, keep it up. If you can improve your general diet that would help a lot. Is fresh fruit and vegies cheap and easy to get where you live? I know in some parts of the world fresh produce is really expensive, but if it's relatively cheap in your area you should take advantage of that and make fruit and vegies a staple part of your daily diet.

catching fish said:
The symptoms I describe are the worst when I first wake up in the morning. Everyday I wake up and I am so out of it I can't even function. I generally have no idea what date it is, what my plans are for the day, and I usually just sit on my bed blankly until I slowly come to.
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Is it possible that your actual sleep is disordered/abnormal?? What is your pre-sleep routine like?
 
catching fish, as your doctor should have told you, what you're feeling is a psychological problem, not a physical one.

You feel like you've damaged your brain irreversibly, but what you've done is triggered a psychological reaction that is messing with your brain chemistry, making you feel depressed and dissociated. There is no permanent damage. Physically, you are fine.
 
Sounds like alcohol triggered depression to me but I'm not a doctor. I had an mri done a while ago because I have had multiple concussions, abused alcohol and other various substances and I was sort of shocked that everything came back normal. I think it's more likely your symptoms are mental but if it persists you might want to see a doctor.
 
alcohol is actually pretty safe on the brain. there are people who drink heavily for decades and never really have any problems with brain damage. any damage that you did do, should heal up within the next couple of years if you stay off GABA drugs.
 
Being a HEAVY drinker from ages 16 through 21, I have experienced the symptoms you have described. After being sober for a while, you will return back to normal. Its been almost 2 1/2 since I've taken any mind altering substances, and physically, I have never felt better in my entire life. Take up excersise, that will do wonders for you and your brain.
 
burn out said:
alcohol is actually pretty safe on the brain. there are people who drink heavily for decades and never really have any problems with brain damage. any damage that you did do, should heal up within the next couple of years if you stay off GABA drugs.
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I wouldn't call it 'safe', actually. Alcohol destroys glial cells (considered the 'helper cells' in the brain). 'Wet Brain', Wernickie's encephalopathy and Korsakoff syndrome are a couple of other issues that alcohol can induce or potentiate.
 
Sometimes your body just can't take it anymore at ALL! And its time to stop...I use to party hard on everything i could get my hands on now if i do anything even drink and trust me i do...i get wicked physical symptoms no matter what i put in my body its not worth the crash and the sick brain dead i cant live like this anymore feeling...
 
burn out said:
alcohol is actually pretty safe on the brain. there are people who drink heavily for decades and never really have any problems with brain damage. any damage that you did do, should heal up within the next couple of years if you stay off GABA drugs.
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Quoted for truth, however I would narrow that down to more like "should heal up within the next 6-8 months". Having said that, everyone is different and it could take more or less time for him to recover.
 
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