Fear and how to overcome it

juniorcat

Bluelighter
Joined
Jun 14, 2011
Messages
147
This is a thread about overcoming fear. Not necessarily drug related fear. But fear in general. Lets talk about your experiences and advice on how to overcome fear.
Thanks.
 
"Expose yourself to your deepest fear; after that, fear has no power, and the fear of freedom shrinks and vanishes. You are free." J. Morisson

Well, I was afraid of being disapproved, got disapproved a couple of times, I'm not afraid any more of that :)
 
Good idea JC! Welcome to TDS by the way! :)

Maybe you might like to share some of your own experiences with regard to Fear/Fear related experiences that you have faced/overcome n your own life, on here...?


I think the over used cliche about facing it really rings true. Personally I can get very fearful in random social settings, especially when conversation is just about day to day personal, regular things...when there isn't an objective topic/agenda to talk about, I tend to feel very exposed, self-critical and fearful.

I find just focusing on how I am feeling and trying to accept it unconditionally and maintaining my own inner dialogue helps. Very often having ignored this 'instinct' in the past I would have made very bad decisions when it comes to other people. I would have dismissed myself completely and suffered because of it, knocking my own esteem in the process.
Alternatively I have also been quick to judge/criticise based on fear, so its good not to want to run away/get rid of the feeling either and just try to 'listen' to what it represents.
...Still trying to get the balance ;)
 
I try my best to look at my thoughts and understand that the fearful ones are mostly untrue. If I can do that then it doesn't matter whether they come or not because I do not believe in them. Thoughts like I suck, I can't do this, I'm a failure, etc. As soon as they're recognized as false, then they have no power.

But I'm not often able to do this. So usually when it comes to fear I try to accept and live with the feeling. Sometimes it's there, sometimes it's not. For now anyways. Maybe things will change, who knows.
 
Fear is normal for me at 32. I was scared of the dark. Now I'm scared for my daughter... and not being around for her. If you are scared you are alert. Pay attention. Is there anything to fear? If not relax a bit. But be aware.
 
Asclepy, I've heard of various methods to overcoming fear. I've heard meditating is great for that sort of thing. But I've also heard it might make you more aware of your fears at first. I read somewhere that you need a proper master to teach you how to meditate. Or you'l do it wrong and be 'mentally disturbed'.

To be fair there is alot of bullshit on the internet. I always wonder if what I'm reading is sound advice or not.
 
I suppose this is sidetracking to meditation. But I just found this link.

http://www.behind-the-tm-facade.org/transcendental_meditation-harmful-abstracts.htm

Excerpt, Side-Effects section: "Not all effects of the practice of meditation are beneficial. Shapiro (1992) found that 62.9% of the subjects reported adverse effects during and after meditation and 7.4% experienced profoundly adverse effects. The length of practice (from 16 to 105 months) did not make any difference to the quality and frequency of adverse effects. These adverse effects were relaxation-induced anxiety and panic; paradoxical increases in tension; less motivation in life; boredom; pain; impaired reality testing; confusion and disorientation; feeling 'spaced out'; depression; increased negativity; being more judgmental; and, ironically, feeling addicted to meditation.

"Other adverse effects described (Craven, 1989) are uncomfortable kinesthetic sensations, mild dissociation, feelings of guilt and, via anxiety-provoking phenomena, psychosis-like symptoms, grandiosity, elation, destructive behaviour and suicidal feelings. Kutz et al. (1985a,b) described feelings of defenselessness, which in turn produce unpleasant affective experiences, such as fear, anger, apprehension and despair."
 
i like this definition of meditation...

intransitive verb

: to engage in contemplation or reflection
: to engage in mental exercise (as concentration on one's breathing or repetition of a mantra) for the purpose of reaching a heightened level of spiritual awareness

transitive verb

: to focus one's thoughts on : reflect on or ponder over
: to plan or project in the mind : intend, purpose

merriam-webster

;-)
 
Asclepy, I've heard of various methods to overcoming fear. I've heard meditating is great for that sort of thing. But I've also heard it might make you more aware of your fears at first. I read somewhere that you need a proper master to teach you how to meditate. Or you'l do it wrong and be 'mentally disturbed'.

To be fair there is alot of bullshit on the internet. I always wonder if what I'm reading is sound advice or not.


Personally JC, I dont understand how anyone could become 'Mentally disturbed' from Meditation?
Perhaps this is in relation to some sort of distructive Cult- type situation; where people had to endure sleep/food deprevation and ingest copious amounts of Psychotropics, or something of that nature?

For the average Joe, basic Meditation seems to be a very healthy practice which can 'ground' the person, connects mind and body and helps them become more aware/accepting of themselves.

I am not very up to date about the various practices but I would suggest sticking to the popular web sites when doing your research, paying less attention to the more sensational ones.


/Edit
I just looked over the link you posted and that study is infact, discussing a TM Cult scenario-these were rampant in the 60' and 70's-this seems to be around the 1980's mark.
I remember reading alot about cults and mind control years ago- Really it has nothing to do with the average, healthy meditative practices that most engage in; being indoctrinated into something that is 'mentally heavy' and very abstract and 'grandiose' in it's nature or, choosing to join a group once or twice a week, are two seperate things.

You will find that usually the simplist and 'lightest' of things are usually the most suitable to show reverence toward and most else is folly. ;)
 
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What I'm afraid of seems to shift with whatever the general focus in life is. Age probably has some role in it too. Right now I'm afraid of slipping back into old habits and missing another x years of life. Also the accelerating progress of technology combined with the fact we haven't had much time to evolve ways of coping with our built-in bloodlust scares me. Other things that scare me..the chaos of the universe, crunkcore, technological singularity / self-aware AI, Islam (only slightly), that Justin Bieber yet lives.

A pragmatic mind can at least lessen some fears, I don't possess such a thing. A different perspective is a working method. Life experiences, psychedelics, whatever works. A better understanding of what you are afraid of.

If you're oblivious to the whole danger/whatever, you won't be afraid of it. =)
 
^ lol @ Just Bieber

I think Awareness can feel like a double edged sword sometimes but personaly, I suffer if I keep my head in the sand... I would rather know, what I have the potential to know, rather than be oblivious. Fear isnt going to go away just because we try to avoid it.

Fear is a natural feeling/response/reaction and in moderation it is healthy and allows us to evolve.
Just a matter of trying to balance it and not letting it completely inhibit us.
 
Remember that everything will be OK. There is much to be experienced in our lives here, so go out every day, do everything you can. Experience new things, get a lot of exercise.

If you are afraid of something, talk to family and friends about it. They are there to help you.

Your mind is stronger than you even know. :)

Finally, learn to love yourself and embrace confidence, while also spreading love and security to those you have in your friends/family. Realize the good parts of life and cherish them more than you dislike whatever trauma you have lived through.

Even if you don't have a lot of friends, keep a few close ones and be as good of a friend as you can possibly be. Don't be afraid to make new friends, just know your boundaries and keep a secure living area for yourself.
 
I think my ability to overcome any of my fears have been severely hampered by being prescribed large amounts of benzodiazepines.

I think my biggest fear is that of the future. Or maybe a fear of mine even greater than that is the fear of being alone.
 
^^ A feeling, move on? Like love, obsession, depression...A feeling is never just a feeling, man. It's often illogical and impossible to avoid. But sometimes amazingly wonderful.
 
I love this litany against fear that is in the book and film Dune

Dune said:
"I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing......Only I will remain."
http://dune.wikia.com/wiki/Litany_Against_Fear




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