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Does the depression/ anxiety ever leave?

tommy34

tommy34

Bluelighter
Joined
Sep 13, 2010
Messages
313
Hey all, I'll give you a little run down on my story so far. I first started feeling symptoms of depression when I was in my early teens. I didn't realise that these symptoms were abnormal until I was 19, I'm not 21. When I think back to school and remember some of the feelings and thought I had, it makes me feel sick. I felt so alone and helpless but I didn't know that was abnormal. I remember in class one day in year 9, the teacher asked what makes us sad. The guy next to me said "I'm never sad, really" I remember dwelling on that for months, I was so jealous. So in my final years of school I did shockingly, the lowest year 12 mark you could get was 25 and I got a 22. I felt horrible about this for years. I worked in the same job since I was 15 and I still do. I figured I was a complete failure. So after I realised that my feelings weren't normal I did a shit load of research and tried many different methods to try make myself feel better, nothing worked. I enrolled in a free uni course late last year to see how I would do. I finished that course last week and to my surprise I got distinctions in 2 out of my 3 classes and I passed the other but not sure of grades yet. So I applied to do a Bachelor of social science (psychology). I'm not sure if I got in yet but with my grades I should. So right now I am finally, after many years of struggle and pain going somewhere in my life. I thought I would feel good about it, everybody keeps saying "wow, you must be so proud of your grades" but I'm not, I don't feel any sense of achievement or relief. In the last year the anxiety has gotten worse too. I think it has stemmed from the depression and being so self conscious. I can't enjoy chilling with friends that Ive know for years because I constantly analyse the situation to the point where I need to piss my pants. I'm so sick of feeling like I'm on top of the world one minute and feeling like I'm at my mothers funeral the next. Will the pain every go away or does it linger forever?
 
I can guarantee that if you stay sober and keep doing what you are doing atleast the anxiety will subside. Eventually the depression will go away because by that time in your life you know what your looking for. Don't you think you will feel better once you graduate and get a job where you can support yourself? You can buy anything you want. You are headed in the right direction and remember that self esteem comes from inside you...you do have a reason to be proud. some people never graduate highschool. Just take things a day at a time.
 
I see you giving great advice in other threads. I think you already know the answers to your questions. I never thought my panic attacks and near catatonic depression would never go away. It took five years of recovery but i haven't had the slightest bit of anxiety for years. Im also going to university.
 
I would hope so in time.

As i've become slowly disillusioned with the world, and see it for what it really is.. i can't honestly take any of it seriously, when you really stand back and look at everything, you begin to see it for the circus it really is. When this happened initially i panicked because it felt like i was letting life slip away... so i enrolled myself into courses of study and despite doing this i still felt the same, if not worse.

The less serious you take life, the calmer you will feel.. knowing that nothing truly matters gives a sense of liberation and brings you into the moment, this is not to suggest stop living.. but once you accept nothing matters, your able to make genuine decisions about what you want from life that will improve your quality of life.

I still experience anxiety and depression, i don't think it ever goes away entirely.. they are afterall useful in indicating whats not working or should be changed, but knowing that nothing matters helps ease this in my experience.
 
wow good point..without anxiety humans wouldnt know when something is wrong either internally or in the environment. Anxiety used to be our protection but now it can be bothersome. I don't have panic attacks anymore but everyone will still have a little situational anxiety. Your are at a point in your life where your making changes.
 
I think malakaix has it right on point. Life is about what really matters to you, not some sort of generalized prescription of what you should do. The only exception to that unfortunately is money, but hey, some people live in tents in the woods and get by just fine.

I don't think I'll ever be rid of my anxiety and depression, but since its onset it has gotten better and I know how to manage it better than I did. I don't think this is true for everyone, some people grow to know exactly what makes them happy and worry free for good.
 
I posted this in one of the other threads but I think that it is worth reposting here.

back on topic:

I used to suffer depression and anxiety, acutely for at least a year, though in retrospect I think it was building for 2 years prior.


Anyway, what really helped my depression was a few things.

1) changed my life circumstances and being proactive. i dealt with the things that were making me depressed. I moved out of the house I was in where I was always having conflict with the housemates, this actually lifted my depression more than anything.

2) having the support of my girlfriend. if you don't have a partner, talk to your friends about your going through. You'd be surprised (as I was) about how supportive they are.

3) cut out drugs. You need to give your brain every chance to reajust chemically. This includes alcohol too.

4) Exercise regularly. exercise has huge benefits to lifting depression.

5) Get counselling. CBT is quite effective in treating depression. I would recommending counselling to everyone with depression.

So yeah, it is possible to beat it. you just have to give it some time and work at it, and work at being healthy too. I haven't had depression for about 6 months now. This time last year, I was stuggling at university, never saw friends anymore, spent almost all my time in bed, and was really miserable. Now, I've just completed my second degree whilst working part time, and have managed to save enough money for a 6 month trip overseas.

i still do have the odd days when I feel down and depressed for no good reason, or worry about something more than I should, but it is nothing like when I was so pumped with fear I couldn't function.
 
malakaix your wrong in thinking nothing truly matters. Love truly matters, it is after all what created both of our existences in the first place. All the bad things/feelings that happen in this world are merely caused by fear/agony.

My depression and anxiety are gone, and I don't foresee them ever coming back with the mind-set I currently possess and express.
 
hmmm i doubt the depression/anxiety will leave 100%..if it did, you would be looking at a brand new person in the mirror...its just over time you somehow learn to accept it and find wayd to reduce the depression and anxiety..whether its meds, yoga, exercise, acupuncture, love, whatever..i have yet to meet anyone that has really steamrolled their depression and anxiety to the point where its not even an issue anymore...im talking about people with depression./anxiety problems not your normal joes...anxiety is normal but being a nervous wreck every day isnt...so i think the bottom line is sort of accepting this as a part of you(very hard to do) and second, finding ways to minimize it or use it towards your advantage..for exaple, channel the anxiety into energy to workout or play sports etc etc..
 
Will it ever leave?

It depends on your mindset.
If you believe it never will,than chances are it won't.
 
ziggo said:
malakaix your wrong in thinking nothing truly matters. Love truly matters, it is after all what created both of our existences in the first place. All the bad things/feelings that happen in this world are merely caused by fear/agony.
Click to expand...

I suppose i could of used different terminology; what i meant was when you realize nothing truly matters you let go of everything and your left with nothing but pure love of the moment which radiates through all existence eternally.. knowing this helps to alleviate anxiety and depression because you know there's nothing to truly be anxious or depressed about.

Sorry for any confusion there. :)
 
malakaix said:
I suppose i could of used different terminology; what i meant was when you realize nothing truly matters you let go of everything and your left with nothing but pure love of the moment which radiates through all existence eternally.. knowing this helps to alleviate anxiety and depression because you know there's nothing to truly be anxious or depressed about.

Sorry for any confusion there. :)
Click to expand...

No offense, but that just sounds like a bunch of words put into a sentence. How am I supposed to incorporate that into my life.
 
Sometimes when people write about 'love' or 'compassion' in Threads it is easy to picture this:
tumblr_lhdb9sAPYw1qgst7no1_250.jpg

-sort of set up!...I know I often do.
However, rather than it being some flight of Fancy...I do think it can be a more earthy, realistic type of scenario.
Being a chronic depressive myself and not relying on meds, well trying not to atm, I often end up leaning toward some kinda philosophical and Spiritual discipline when trying to deal with severe low moods. I am not one for bullshit and especially when depressed cannot suffer unrealistic, ideologies, as I am too cynical and irritated most of the time but there is a need to reconstruct thoughts and internalisations into some kind of value system; lest my feelings cause me to completely self distruct. I find most of the superficial nonsense in society especially the pseudo- spiritual nonsense to be the most vacuous bollocks at the times when you need to make some sense of things.
Here is a link that is along a similar vein to some of the things I find somewhat helpful, personally.
http://www.purifymind.com/DepressionTruth.htm

#note: I dont believe meditation is all Humming and Posturing like a Monk-rather it is reaching a state of mind and body that connects us back in touch with ourselves and allows us to accept, express and deal better with what is going on for us, emotionally and mentally, as it presents itself.

ziggo said:
malakaix your wrong in thinking nothing truly matters. Love truly matters, it is after all what created both of our existences in the first place. All the bad things/feelings that happen in this world are merely caused by fear/agony.
Click to expand...
I agree with with what Belfort said regarding this post.

Many people have destroyed themselves/others because of 'Love'/in the name of it.
Fear can be the impetus for courage and renewal.
It depends on how you use them.
Things arent this black and white IMO, although sometimes it can be necessary to polarise things to temporarily get through situations but this can itself bring about more problems; when the once trusted polarities reveal themselves to not be what we imagined.
 
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tommy34 said:
No offense, but that just sounds like a bunch of words put into a sentence. How am I supposed to incorporate that into my life.
Click to expand...

I'm still figuring that out myself ;)

As i said, i still do experience anxiety and depression.. i can pull myself out of it at times by remembering that none of it truly matters as it's only 'me' giving it value and importance... but that's not to say i've conquered it entirely, it's never as simple as someone explains it when experiencing it, i apologize if my post came across in that manner.
 
I say you find someone to talk with, a professional if not already. When I was younger I hated the thought of seeing one even though I truly needed it.

A couple years ago I suffered a few panic attacks and ended up in the hospital a couple times. I didn't know what was going on but I found some help. It goes away and/or you learn how to control it... but don't expect immediate results. Stay strong and I think you'll be alright :)

PM me if you want to chat.
 
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im sorry to hear you feel down mate, i suffered depresssion as a young guy for a number of reasons and i found eating well and excercise helped me no end , also i laid off the drugs as it only aggrivated matters, one thing that struck me in your post was how you mention being up and down .Im no doc but that sounds like you are suffereing mania to a degree and maybe you should see someone, my best childhood friend had exactly the same syptoms and now takes tablets. Just remember to remind yourself of your worth , the key is managing your condition and stay away from chems which drain your natural good mood enhancers.
 
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