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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

how are you in 1 word ?

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secure in who i am as a person, and what i want to do with life
grateful that i have a loving family and everything i have ever wanted
euphoric from the methadone + tramadol + lyrica + klonopin + weed i ingested earlier :D
 
Desperate.

For a change. I need it fast I think. Trying so hard to get into the clinic here to alkt about my anxiety, and what i can to dot to open. But I live alone, in a city where I have no family or history, st s time when I am so very protective of my feelings due to engagement failure. Its not quite been a year since I took the ring off.

I am also Desperate to get out of society for a min. I could not go to my safe haven this out on Horn Island this year. That breaks my heart.
 
i took my weeding ring off trying to see if it could even come off by hand.

it did, it sat for a couple of months - and now its on my other hand because i really do love her, it(haha), and my self...
finally
hehe
;-D



a broken heart is built up stronger
 
Went up to my wife today with two aspirin and a glass of water.

She looks at the water and aspirin and says "but i don't have a headache"

I said " GooD! Let's fuck"









i'm still running for my life..help! 8o=D
 
Cleaning. If external environment is a reflection of inner state then I'm in trouble.
 
thin line between life and death.

MISERABLE.DEPRESSED.SAD.BROKENHEARTED.NOSTALGIC.

my stepfather died on thursday, two days ago. i dont even know...
the viewing is on wednesday, funeral service on thursday.

i cant stop crying. i keep pouring out an endless amount of tears. i feel so drained. beyond sad...so much pain and sadness.
 
G<3'sU I am so sorry for your loss hun :( My heart is breaking for you and your family. May he rest in peace and may you and your loved oneslean on each other for support during this difficult time. Much love hun, take care <3

Legerity said:
Cleaning. If external environment is a reflection of inner state then I'm in trouble.
Click to expand...

Yep, this is where I was a couple of weeks ago mate! Feels so good to clean, and so much happier to be in a clean, tidy, organised environment :)


Me: shaky
My hands have got the shakes real bad. My parents are coming over for lunch and my mum always notices and comments when my hands are shaking...they think I haven't been drinking but in reality yesterday was my first alcohol-free day for like 2 months :|
How do I stop these shakes!! ....other than to have a drink...
 
^Mothers are hard to deceive! Maybe try and not focus on her and think about yourself-for a change, you've done right by you and her thoughts aside, think of N3O-the one who is always thinking of everyone else and needs to enjoy an evening for herself for a change, even if that means not worrying about everyone else's opinions. Your a star hun, take some time out and think about enjoyin being with yourself, as yourself<3, worries and all but to be put to the side! ;) <3<
 
mercyAdbenzo's
:-/
time, we all suffer through this shit to do better for ourselves and others -
honesty with your parents to avoid further anxieties and stuff from hiding .

i wouldnt worry much, if it was going to be a full on "fit", you would of been well into it yesterday - tomorrow will be worse, so? the next day will be better, physically - your body and mind really isnt worth the stuff, neither is their scheme to get rich doing so.
 
godlovesugly said:
MISERABLE.DEPRESSED.SAD.BROKENHEARTED.NOSTALGIC.

my stepfather died on thursday, two days ago. i dont even know...
the viewing is on wednesday, funeral service on thursday.

i cant stop crying. i keep pouring out an endless amount of tears. i feel so drained. beyond sad...so much pain and sadness.
Click to expand...


i think the "thin line between life and death" is living...

all these feelings come when some you actually respect leaves in any way - but - such Love is what keeps all alive.


i sincerely hope people fkN party after i die... not remain sad or holding on to my life for long... thats my life, i lived it, many others died their own as we all will.

a broken heart, an empty deep sensation maybe, this is a feeling ive had to feel - we have to feel it, and see ourselves in this space once empty no more, how else would/could, does he want it to be, would you want it to be ?


there are many ways to pay honor to someone weve lost and love, morning is one, living-harder seeing-lighter accepting-more is another.



<3 >
RIP
 
n3ophy7e said:
Asclepius and PIP <3 Thank you both so much, you're wonderful <3
Click to expand...

Ditto! <3

Dis-Gruntled(yes lovely SOoO, being Gruntled is pending! ;))

Damn, my ex has cut off our joint A/c which means no more internet for Asclepius for a while, was waiting for this to happen TBH...am at my folks, so have access til Mon, wil see what I can do after then...:p
 
^^ Damn!! Can you get pre-paid internet? My boyfriend has a pre-paid wireless modem thingy for when he goes away for work. He bought it for like $30 (with $30 credit on it), you just connect it to your laptop and set it up and away you go. He plays poker online so he uses it for like 4-5 hours every night and the $30 lasts him about a month.


Me: worried
My kitty Smoodge has been outside all morning, and it's been raining. I've called him a few times and he hasn't come back yet. He does this sometimes and he always comes home eventually. But I fucking hate it!!! So worried :(
I'm sure he's fine...
 
^
hmm
be watching our for him around dusk or dawn -
thats when they go out to hunt, and are most active.

hes watching puddles dip is all, hiding somewhere for now -
they usually are stubborn like this
 
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