What made you decide to get clean?

[Wolfmans_BrothEr]

Last January I was riding the train back from Newark with a pocket full of dope. As I was sitting a sudden rush of realization and regret for everything I had been doing filled my mind. Over the few months earlier I had gotten addicted to heroin, spent my entire savings, stolen $1200, lost almost all of my friends, was lying to my mother, lost all my muscle and was skinny as fuck, all I cared about was getting dope and the jail and rehabs I had been to over the past 8 years was all for nothing. I had been battling this addiction for so long and I would dig myself out of a hole just to fall into a bigger one

And I just started crying in the middle of the train. It was the first time I had cried in a while and I couldn't hold it back for the life of me. it was like heavy weeping and I ended up crying the entire walk home. It was so profound and felt almost cathartic that it had such a huge impact on me. It seemed almost like an epiphany

After that whole episode I had a huge difference in my outlook and felt completely changed about life and what I wanted out of it. Whenever I think about it I find it really weird that after 8 years of all these different rehabs, going to jail and all this shit happening telling me I needed to get clean. In the past I never seriously had the desire to stay sober, and within the time-span of an hour I was completely different

Before this whenever I heard people talking about epiphanies or cathartic experiences I never took it seriously, but then this happened, and it was just so...life changing. I don't know what to think anymore

 

[TheLostBoys]

Last January I was riding the train back from Newark with a pocket full of dope. As I was sitting a sudden rush of realization and regret for everything I had been doing filled my mind. Over the few months earlier I had gotten addicted to heroin, spent my entire savings, stolen $1200, lost almost all of my friends, was lying to my mother, lost all my muscle and was skinny as fuck, all I cared about was getting dope and the jail and rehabs I had been to over the past 8 years was all for nothing. I had been battling this addiction for so long and I would dig myself out of a hole just to fall into a bigger one

And I just started crying in the middle of the train. It was the first time I had cried in a while and I couldn't hold it back for the life of me. it was like heavy weeping and I ended up crying the entire walk home. It was so profound and felt almost cathartic that it had such a huge impact on me. It seemed almost like an epiphany

After that whole episode I had a huge difference in my outlook and felt completely changed about life and what I wanted out of it. Whenever I think about it I find it really weird that after 8 years of all these different rehabs, going to jail and all this shit happening telling me I needed to get clean. In the past I never seriously had the desire to stay sober, and within the time-span of an hour I was completely different

Before this whenever I heard people talking about epiphanies or cathartic experiences I never took it seriously, but then this happened, and it was just so...life changing. I don't know what to think anymore

Its a amazing feeling when it happens......you gotta change from the inside & thats exactly what you did. Its sort of finally understanding what your purpose is & how everything will be better just from all that crying. Its an understanding that one has to go threw to understand & cant be told. Good for you & good luck with your future!

 

[disasterline]

From 15 I was addicted to opiates. Got clean for college at 18, lasted about 6 weeks and had to drop out because of a relapse. I had no job from 18-21. Dad and family were hounding me about everything and was about to get kicked out of my house.

So I enlisted with the army, thinking that would get them off my case, and right before I would leave for basic training say my knee hurt or something and get out of going.

I got caught with almost a felony amount of stamp bags. I thought I was done for. Some how the public defeander got it down to a misconduct charge. A fine and no probation. I took it as a sign from god.

Went to basic training more dope sick than I have ever been in my life. It was really hard, but here I am over a year in the army. And it feels great not to worry about getting a fix everyday

 

[fulgore15]

i was real bad off slangin herioin and doing it running around with guns and i hit a spot where my connect was out and i didnt have shit blew thru my money buyin other shit to get by .. and i was broke detoxing so bad and alone for like a week and thru out that time i found out who really was my friends not all the fools i had around me when i had dope and money ..and i just got it in my head that i was done with it and didnt wanna live my life chase'n dope so i quit it was hard and i still think about dope but u just gotta be strong

Good for you man. My cousin got involved with the drug crowd in L.A., you can tell quick who are your real friends. Drugs can be fun every once in a while, hell I still do cocaine once in a blue moon (I dont do it more often cause coming down off it sucks). People just have to realize what is reality, and it can be really hard sometimes.

 

[helpwithhabit]

I decided to get clean because my heroin addiction was getting out of hand and for the first time in my life rather then committing petty shop lifting, thefts etc I started stealing of my mum which I have never ever done before and when she found out I was injecting H i could see how upset and hurt she was.

I got myself onto a methadone program as quickly as possible so as to stop me from having to fund such an expensive habit which resulted in me stealing everyday whether from shops, friends or family.

I am now in what I call recovery and I am far from "cured" but taken a few very big steps on the ladder of recovery.

I live with the guilt of stealing from my Mum and letting her down and hurting her everyday.

If you haven't ever used heroin don't start now because if it grabs you, your going to have a fight on your hands to get and stay clean.