I'm going insane living in this house....

[alwaysblazed]

Right now my mother is going through a divorce with my psychotic step father. As I said before he is an abusive prick that likes to be in control. He was okay at first and we all got along but then he got crazy. One time I was in a fight with him and he ended up choking me and then slamming me on the kitchen table so hard it broke. My sister got scared and held up a frying pan to him telling him he better let go of me. I usually never let anyone get ahold of me like that but after he let go of my throat I ran into their bedroom closet (walk in kind of) and threw up all over. The same day he also threw my cd player at the wall and it left a mark on the wall (imprint of the cd player)....this was back when I was fourteen I believe... I'm now seventeen by the way so I've been dealing with his shit since I was like 12.

He is a lying bastard and I'm so close to killing him. I know that I won't so don't worry about me saying this on the internet... We all have our thoughts. Other than that his daughter is like his wife... she fucking gets to beat on my mother (literally did once) and my step dad will be like it's all my mothers fault. One time when I went downstairs to help my sister from my crazy step sister she kicked me in the fucking chest and ribs. Luckily my mother was there at the time because they never would believe the crazy shit she would do to us. Even now he has moved out of the bedroom I think over a year ago or maybe just a year and sleeps in the little storage room next to my step sister...

This guy (step father) makes me so angry.. He's even been claiming us on his tax reports saying he provided for us and he didn't give us one dime. So then he makes money on us when the check comes back and we don't even get a dollar out of that. Just yesterday I guess he put a lock on the door downstairs where the laundry room is and now we can't wash our clothes. Seriously look at this shit:

I don't even get if that is legal to do. It's his house but still my mother and him are in a marriage... And we pay for shit in the house as well. I'm about to go downstairs and kick open that door. I wonder what would happen though if he called the cops. Anyways I am leaving out a lot because I could go on and on about him. This guy knew my mother back in high school and he was cool. Then he got so crazy I assume. He also is a bitch for his own mother. It's like he wants to make his mother happy... His mother was a prostitute as well and I think that's why he has little respect for women.

Ugh the lock thing really made me angry and I think I'm about to lose it. I don't know what to do. I have been staying out of things but now I really want to take a hammer to his head. The crap he is putting my mother through makes me think that going to prison will be worth it.

 

[Jabberwocky]

Hey, your going insane over all this would serve your Mom's ex more than it would serve you or your Mom. Get legal advice and proceed by it rather that your emotional gut response. Your rage is valid as all genuine emotions are valid but you need to play it smart right now.

I'm not going to attempt to guess about tenant/landlord law where you are. It is likely Mom's ex is behaving in a way that is illegal. The remedies that will be lasting and serve your interests are one's that you obtain through legal remedies.

Take a deep breath and approach this as rationally as you can. I'm sorry this is happening to you.

 

[alwaysblazed]

Thank you and I know we are going to take legal action but sometimes I feel that's not enough.. He's not home right now and I just don't know what's going to happen when he does comeback.

He has the audacity to put the fucking lock on the door when we pay for the internet/cable/phone (they make us pay for a separate connection because they're all fat gamer nerds and need their own modem) and if we don't he tries cutting our wires, food for his dog because he stopped getting it and so much other shit.

He also took the locks off my sister and also my bedroom door I forget when... But his daughter has one that has a lock and key. Also we got in a car accident and the car wasn't even totaled and he freakin got the car junked. My mom wouldn't give him the keys and he started smashing the car window with a hammer.

Even the local cops think he's crazy/control freak and they told my mom she needs to get her and the kids out of the house.

 

[theartofwar]

you can call the police and have him held for observation for 3 days - (section 12'd) - this is do able esp if your house is in your mums name. Get outta there with your mom an sister man, best of luck, that prick is lucky im not within driving distance id make sure he leaves you guys the hell alone >:O

 

[villian]

I definitely wouldn't call the police. They aren't going to detain him because he isn't doing anything illegal (at the moment) and will likely cause even worse problems in the future. If he attacks you again I wouldn't hesitate to call them though.

Have you talked to your mom about the lock on the door? Is it possible for you guys to move out?

Like Enki said the key is to stay calm and think rationally about what you can realistically do.

Best of luck man, I wish you the best.

 

[godlovesugly]

DUDE, i am going through the same shit.

im 24 yrs old, i live with my mother and my stepdad. my stepdad is an ASSHOLE. he has always made my life a living hell. hes a paraplegic, hes paralyzed from the waist down,..he hates his meaningless life, so he takes it all out on me. hes always fuckin been so nice to my sister, but he hates my guts for some reason. hes called me a whore, he yells "DRUG ADDICT" from his room at me when i pass by, in high school he used to go in my room when i was at school and just steal my stuff or mess up all my shit and put it all over my floor. i never understood why he did this to ME. wtf did i do to him??? hes packed up all my stuff in suitcases [when me and my sister were younger] and told me i was getting sent to live with my dad in maryland. hes just a dick.

now my mom, she loves me, BUT she never has done anything about it, or ever stood up for me. she just ignores it like its not even happening. my mom is in denial. and she thinks if she just doesnt see whats going on, theres not anything wrong. as long as she doesnt see it..

im going crazy in this house too. i FEEL crazy. i go to meetings just to escape this house sometimes or just go driving for a couple hours just to get out of here...

i understand what youre going through. i wish i had an answer...cause i need help too.

 

[alwaysblazed]

Thank you everyone and yeah my step father would take my shit as well. And we can't move out because my mom doesn't have a job atm. Its hard as well because the car is gone and the places aren't hiring in our area (walking distance). We also just found out he brought a gold wing motorcycle which cost a lot of money but he won't pay for his own shit. Which adds to my rage!

 

[TheLostBoys]

Damn, that lock on that door reminds me of the move "The Stepfather" where he puts a lock on the basement door. What you have to do is move out a.s.a.p. & I know thats so easy to say compare to doing since your mom isnt working but if you can get help from an outside source like a relative or what not, do it.

 

[HeadyDreadyMamma]

wtf that guy is is a nut if you were smart you would put camers up in the house and video errrr thing hes doing and turn it in.!!

 

[theartofwar]

I definitely wouldn't call the police. They aren't going to detain him because he isn't doing anything illegal (at the moment) and will likely cause even worse problems in the future. If he attacks you again I wouldn't hesitate to call them though.

Have you talked to your mom about the lock on the door? Is it possible for you guys to move out?

Like Enki said the key is to stay calm and think rationally about what you can realistically do.

Best of luck man, I wish you the best.

I've been detained twice because people claimed I was manic - I wasn't at the time although I had been and had been out of control - I think it varies on whether or not the source is reliable enough for them to take you seriously. I dunno, just throwing out idea, what a shit situation I feel bad .

 

[Bojangles69]

He did do something illegal actually and that was claiming you for taxes when he can't prove that he has supported you in any type of way.
If the mfkr really is in the wrong and really getting to you I would call the IRS up and tell them exactly what he did. They will request verification from him and when he's unable to submit it they will come knocking on his door. Thats a serious charge that can get him some time in prison on a first conviction.

Honestly I would not tolerate any of the shit he's doing. But you can't turn around and start doing any illegal shit yourself. Collect evidence on anything illegal he does and use it to blackmale his ass. Also, does he have a facebook? A bit of social ridicule can go a long way. Take that picture you posted here of the lock on the laundry door and post it on his facebook then the reason he did (cheap ass control freak). Its not illegal and if he doesn't like it he can kiss your ass. Turn other people against him, his friends, family, etc. ANYTHING weird he does I'd honestly start posing that shit all over the internet. I actually did this to my brother before and it worked better than I could have ever thought.
You CAN beat him at his game but you have to show you have more discipline and control then he does. Do tedious little things to stress him out, exploit anything weird he does, taunt him to become abusive and have a video camera ready. You already said he choked you and its too late to do anything about that but if you can recreate that scenario with a video camera you can sue this fuck for emotional damage. I'm dead serious. I'm a deliberate and conniving little fuck when I need to be and I suggest you become the same way. I can be very calculated and crazy with some of the shit I do and all you need to employ is a bit of psychological warfare. Getting him on camera abusing you would be one of the best things you can do. You can get a restraining order on him and that will be the end of that. If he steps within 100yards of you all you'd have to do is call the police and bye bye stepfather from hell.

I seriously hope you do not go on tolerating this shit and I guarantee if you want you can really make his life a living hell.

 

[alwaysblazed]

We live out of state and there's no relatives who could take us in and school situation.

Also my step fathers family is just as nuts his mother is a psycho bitch. I think she fucked him up in the head. She would screw men infront of him (she was a prostitute). Anyways the facebook thing won't work since I don't have him added. Also we plan to get the IRS involved. The thing is if you try to make his life hell he'll do crazier shit and end up on top. That's why he put the lock on the door. He changed the garage password and probably will try to put a lock on the door when everything in there is our stuff from moving. He will make our life more living hell than we could manage to make his.

I hate that he is winning. I mean ill have a place to live for college but I can let this happen when my mom and sister are still here.

 

[alwaysblazed]

I've been detained twice because people claimed I was manic - I wasn't at the time although I had been and had been out of control - I think it varies on whether or not the source is reliable enough for them to take you seriously. I dunno, just throwing out idea, what a shit situation I feel bad .

Don't feel bad! Its not like its your fault. But it means a lot that people do care. Thank you

 

[Cyc]

As someone who had a couple of 'step dads' growing up, I can definitely relate to what you're feeling.

In the animal kingdom, non-biological offspring are often killed when the mother finds a new mate. I earnestly believe that traces of this are often seen in humans, when step parents treat their step children like absolute shit.

I also had a step dad who beat the shit out of me a few times growing up. Now that I'm older, I see it in one of my friends, who treats his biological daughter with more kindness and sympathy than he does his step daughter. I've pointed this out a few times, and while he grudgingly acknowledges this as truth, he doesn't see it as a big problem.

You need to understand that humans, like all species, are wired a certain way, to protect and cherish their biological offspring more than others. It may be that your step father is threatened by you. You may need to assert your dominance in some way in the near future, to prevent this sort of thing from getting out of hand. I often wish I had physically asserted myself over my step father as a teenager, but luckily my mother divorced him when I was 16, which prevented things from coming to a head. However, given enough time, I believe that this was inevitable.

 

[alwaysblazed]

As someone who had a lot of 'step dads' growing up, I can definitely relate to what you're feeling.

In the animal kingdom, non-biological offspring are often killed when the mother finds a new mate. I earnestly believe that traces of this are often seen in humans, when step parents treat their step children like absolute shit.

I also had a step dad who beat the shit out of me a few times growing up. Now that I'm older, I see it in one of my friends, who treats his biological daughter with more kindness and sympathy than he does his step daughter. I've pointed this out a few times, and while he grudgingly acknowledges this as truth, he doesn't see it as a big problem.

You need to understand that humans, like all species, are wired a certain way, to protect and cherish their biological offspring more than others. It may be that your step father is threatened by you. You may need to assert your dominance in some way in the near future, to prevent this sort of thing from getting out of hand.

I have tried to assert my dominance after he was going nuts but that only ended up with me being slammed on the table. Next time he shut the power off in my room I banged on his wall turned my radio all the way up (portable) and he got angry he couldn't get in my room...he even started drilling the door knob off. And it come off. Other times he would try to scare me but I'm not afraid...I'm only afraid that I will do something I will regret. That's why I've been trying to stay away.

 

[Captain.Heroin]

Report him for tax fraud, first and foremost. Don't let him know you've done this until you have one of those nifty "confirmation numbers" as proof of having gotten him in trouble with the IRS, soon to have to go through an audit.

This is just being a good citizen if you ask me.

Putting you as a dependent means he has to take financial care of you, since otherwise, he is cheating the government out of money.

The IRS *always* has time for another audit, and I'm sure that the person you'll be reporting will be royally pissed.

...

As for the combination lock on the door, sit there and go numerically through all numbers until it opens. I have done this before, it never fails. Just have a good enough memory not to forget which number you're on.

 

[alwaysblazed]

Report him for tax fraud, first and foremost. Don't let him know you've done this until you have one of those nifty "confirmation numbers" as proof of having gotten him in trouble with the IRS, soon to have to go through an audit.

This is just being a good citizen if you ask me.

Putting you as a dependent means he has to take financial care of you, since otherwise, he is cheating the government out of money.

The IRS *always* has time for another audit, and I'm sure that the person you'll be reporting will be royally pissed.

...

As for the combination lock on the door, sit there and go numerically through all numbers until it opens. I have done this before, it never fails. Just have a good enough memory not to forget which number you're on.

I'm going to tell my mother tomorrow and hopefully she calls the irs asap. And about the lock combo hope it works or else body slamming the door sounds good. Like everyone charge at once... Haha my mom was trying to open it with a credit card and then a knife lol...

 

[Eyes On the Roll]

sounds like you are living with a psychopath.

What I would do (im not in no way suggesting you do this) is I would push his buttons and talk back when he's being a dick. I'd get him pissed off enough to hit me and leave a mark. Then i would call the police.

 

[Bojangles69]

/\ How long is the divorce going to take? Because if your mom is already in the process of divorcing him it shouldn't be long till you move out no? I mean unless your mom plans on staying with him after the divorce which wouldn't make sense.

Also, WHO is supporting you? Is it your mom or the stepfather? If your mom is supporting you then shes likely paying her share of the bills right? Then why not change the locks yourself and tell him to kiss your ass? Even if his name is on the title if your mom is paying rent she is entitled to have access to certain areas of the house. I don't believe he can legally do what he's doing like putting locks on the washing room door. You are a legal resident and if your mom is paying her way you have the right to rip those locks right off the fucking door. Stop being so afraid of this guy. I'd honestly punch myself in the face fightclub style then beat him unconscious with a bat (not dead). Call the cops and tell them he hit you and you were trying to defend yourself.

It sounds like you've been in this situation so long that you have become a bit brainwashed like no matter what you do he's the "master" or something. You need to get that out of your head I mean I'd honestly rather live on the streets then with a dirtbag like that. Fuck him.

 

[alwaysblazed]

/\ How long is the divorce going to take? Because if your mom is already in the process of divorcing him it shouldn't be long till you move out no? I mean unless your mom plans on staying with him after the divorce which wouldn't make sense.

Also, WHO is supporting you? Is it your mom or the stepfather? If your mom is supporting you then shes likely paying her share of the bills right? Then why not change the locks yourself and tell him to kiss your ass? Even if his name is on the title if your mom is paying rent she is entitled to have access to certain areas of the house. I don't believe he can legally do what he's doing like putting locks on the washing room door. You are a legal resident and if your mom is paying her way you have the right to rip those locks right off the fucking door. Stop being so afraid of this guy. I'd honestly punch myself in the face fightclub style then beat him unconscious with a bat (not dead). Call the cops and tell them he hit you and you were trying to defend yourself.

It sounds like you've been in this situation so long that you have become a bit brainwashed like no matter what you do he's the "master" or something. You need to get that out of your head I mean I'd honestly rather live on the streets then with a dirtbag like that. Fuck him.

I'm not afraid of him. I faught him enough. Its just tiring now and I'm off to college in the fall. Get something on my record like assault will fuck up my future. I am trying to avoid that and that's why I posted this thread. I have a lot at risk and I'm not going to have him laugh when my life is ruined because I made a stupid choice. I get what you're trying to say but this situation isn't as easy as it sounds.