Sapphires
Greenlighter
I'll preface this thread by stating I weigh 180 lbs and do not have experience with ANY other psychedelic drugs besides Salvia.
It's a long read, be warned!
About a week ago, after researching the chemical thoroughly, I took roughly 18-20mg of 2C-I alone at 1AM with no obligations for the next few days and a pleasant environment. The trip started out great, music was wonderful and there was an immense euphoria and eyes open fractal visuals that went along with the music. About two hours into the trip I became struck with the fear that I was actually in my bed grinding my teeth to the extent that they were cracking and falling out. I could taste blood and I had to keep feeling my teeth with my fingers to make sure they were there. Additionally, I would keep spitting to make sure that there was no blood (there never was.) I had no idea what I was feeling with my fingers, because I didn't recognize my teeth and at one point they felt like baby teeth that were lose and falling out. I understood that this was likely just the jaw clenching (my jaw was moving like shivering on a cold day) but I couldn't remove the fear that I was going to wake up the next day in the hospital with no teeth.
I turned off my laptop, turned off the music, and turned off the TV and tried to go to sleep but all I could see when I closed my eyes was millions of moving gears and I had the immense feeling that I had broken a carefully pieced together reality that took someone an infinite amount of time to make. I kept getting more and more scared that I'd never get back into reality and I'd never be able to sleep again, and at that point I had a strange closed-eye hallucination of a rainbow flipbook and each time a page turned, I'd feel every single emotion (happy/anxious/terrified/sad) and an infinite amount of pages would go on and on and on. This made me extremely depressed because I imagined that it was some sort of creation of parallel universes and I was creating a rift in them that would cause lots of problems for someone or the universe.
I opened up my eyes realizing that I was not going to fall asleep, and looking at the clock, I still have another 3-4 hours of the trip left. I turned on the TV but the shows were so bizarre and I had no idea what was going on, everything scared me.. I kept trying to change the channels but there were only 2 shows and an infomercial that kept repeating over and over and over again. By the time I realized that every channel was a loop of the same thing and that the menus weren't actually there (they were just empty black spaces where the channel guides were supposed to go) I tried to do something else. The first thing I did was pick up my phone to call someone, but when I had it in my hand I had no idea what it was and none of the menus worked. At this point, I tried to take some Benadryl to knock myself out to sleep. It took me what seemed like an eternity to open the bottle because I was honestly under the impression that the triangle safety point was no longer there. I took either 100-200mg worth of pills.
This is where the extreme schizophrenic effects started. I managed to turn my laptop back on and I remember searching for "How long does a 2C-I trip last." I did this before I took the dose and remembered the results that were there, but they were all gone. All of the results on the first page of Google were 100% clear and easily read but all of the information was different and hyperinflated. Instead of 6-8 hours, the results were saying "12-20 weeks" and some results were saying "I've been tripping on 2C-I for a month" and "Help I've been trapped here for years." This HORRIFIED me and I immediately shut off my laptop and went back to bed to watch the same loop of television over and over again.
Then I started hearing things. There was evil laughter outside my window and I started hearing voices through the noise my air conditioner was making. Someone kept saying "It took me forever to get all of this chaos into order and you've gone and fucked it all up." I thought that what was outside was going to come inside at any moment and drag me into some bizarro world, but I knew I still had some grasp on reality because the clock I kept checking was going up and up. I had an immense fear that at any moment, my last hope of being sane (the clock) would do something strange, as every other electronic device or hold on reality was completely gone. Lights flickered, evil laughs continued, and fear continued for another two hours. I thought I was trapped in some time skip and I'd have to carry out a years worth of life in this alternate world for an infinite amount of times just to get back to where I was.
About an hour after the peak effects (and 5-6 hours into the trip) I managed to maintain some composure by naming things around my room and saying things I knew. That's a pillow, that's a cell phone, that's the carpet, that's popcorn. I stood up, went to the bathroom, and when I came back I knew who I was and what had happened. Despite the initial composure, every so often I'd go back into trip mode and become terrified again. If the clock wouldn't change, I'd think all hell was about to break loose (but only on a grander scale because obviously the hallucinations are much more powerful if I'm walking around and trying to be sane.) I tried to call people and no one answered, the TV remote stopped working properly for a period of time, and the TV channels kept repeating themselves.
About an hour after THAT I tried to change the TV channel again and since it was now morning I turned on the local news. There were newscasters but their faces were like aliens and I had NO IDEA what they were saying. It's like I lost all concept of english (which is apparently called word salad for schizophrenia sufferers) During this new phase where schizophrenia was really strong, I kept feeling wetness on areas of my body (like something dripped on me) like my neck. I'd go to feel where the wet spot was, and my finger would get wet but then when I looked at my finger or the area, it was completely dry. Colors were all in metallic shades, and I kept seeing something under my desk (but it was amusing and not as scary as the thing in my backyard earlier) I kept hearing the evil laughs, but they were fading out and eventually I must have passed out from all the benadryl.
When I woke up the next day I was extremely paranoid and I've been slightly paranoid for a week since that I'm going to end up back in the trip, however I can't help but think I learned a lot (though I haven't figured out what) from the witnessing of what appeared to be time and dimensions (when I do something, there are infinite alternate versions of what I did so I should try to do only good things). Even though the trip was what I would call TERRIBLE I think it was my fault for trying to end it 4 hours early and expecting it to ACTUALLY end 4 hours early. I should've enjoyed it for what it was worth, kept the music on, and chilled the fuck out. Taking too much diphenhydramine (a delerient) probably compounded the effects of being trapped out of reality, but then what stops the fear of breaking my teeth?
I don't want to rule out 2C-I or other psychedelics because they definitely have a lot to teach when used correctly and respected, obviously 20mg (an intermediate but slightly higher than usual dose) was too much, but would 1-5mg still cause such terrible effects?
Is this type of bad trip normal for a first trip and will the effects subside when trying again? I've read countless experiences of 2C-I but none really share any similarities with mine, which is why I made this thread.
I'd like to know what other people would do in my situation. Never use psychedelics again because the first experience was bad, or try it again with the knowledge you've gained?
It's a long read, be warned!
About a week ago, after researching the chemical thoroughly, I took roughly 18-20mg of 2C-I alone at 1AM with no obligations for the next few days and a pleasant environment. The trip started out great, music was wonderful and there was an immense euphoria and eyes open fractal visuals that went along with the music. About two hours into the trip I became struck with the fear that I was actually in my bed grinding my teeth to the extent that they were cracking and falling out. I could taste blood and I had to keep feeling my teeth with my fingers to make sure they were there. Additionally, I would keep spitting to make sure that there was no blood (there never was.) I had no idea what I was feeling with my fingers, because I didn't recognize my teeth and at one point they felt like baby teeth that were lose and falling out. I understood that this was likely just the jaw clenching (my jaw was moving like shivering on a cold day) but I couldn't remove the fear that I was going to wake up the next day in the hospital with no teeth.
I turned off my laptop, turned off the music, and turned off the TV and tried to go to sleep but all I could see when I closed my eyes was millions of moving gears and I had the immense feeling that I had broken a carefully pieced together reality that took someone an infinite amount of time to make. I kept getting more and more scared that I'd never get back into reality and I'd never be able to sleep again, and at that point I had a strange closed-eye hallucination of a rainbow flipbook and each time a page turned, I'd feel every single emotion (happy/anxious/terrified/sad) and an infinite amount of pages would go on and on and on. This made me extremely depressed because I imagined that it was some sort of creation of parallel universes and I was creating a rift in them that would cause lots of problems for someone or the universe.
I opened up my eyes realizing that I was not going to fall asleep, and looking at the clock, I still have another 3-4 hours of the trip left. I turned on the TV but the shows were so bizarre and I had no idea what was going on, everything scared me.. I kept trying to change the channels but there were only 2 shows and an infomercial that kept repeating over and over and over again. By the time I realized that every channel was a loop of the same thing and that the menus weren't actually there (they were just empty black spaces where the channel guides were supposed to go) I tried to do something else. The first thing I did was pick up my phone to call someone, but when I had it in my hand I had no idea what it was and none of the menus worked. At this point, I tried to take some Benadryl to knock myself out to sleep. It took me what seemed like an eternity to open the bottle because I was honestly under the impression that the triangle safety point was no longer there. I took either 100-200mg worth of pills.
This is where the extreme schizophrenic effects started. I managed to turn my laptop back on and I remember searching for "How long does a 2C-I trip last." I did this before I took the dose and remembered the results that were there, but they were all gone. All of the results on the first page of Google were 100% clear and easily read but all of the information was different and hyperinflated. Instead of 6-8 hours, the results were saying "12-20 weeks" and some results were saying "I've been tripping on 2C-I for a month" and "Help I've been trapped here for years." This HORRIFIED me and I immediately shut off my laptop and went back to bed to watch the same loop of television over and over again.
Then I started hearing things. There was evil laughter outside my window and I started hearing voices through the noise my air conditioner was making. Someone kept saying "It took me forever to get all of this chaos into order and you've gone and fucked it all up." I thought that what was outside was going to come inside at any moment and drag me into some bizarro world, but I knew I still had some grasp on reality because the clock I kept checking was going up and up. I had an immense fear that at any moment, my last hope of being sane (the clock) would do something strange, as every other electronic device or hold on reality was completely gone. Lights flickered, evil laughs continued, and fear continued for another two hours. I thought I was trapped in some time skip and I'd have to carry out a years worth of life in this alternate world for an infinite amount of times just to get back to where I was.
About an hour after the peak effects (and 5-6 hours into the trip) I managed to maintain some composure by naming things around my room and saying things I knew. That's a pillow, that's a cell phone, that's the carpet, that's popcorn. I stood up, went to the bathroom, and when I came back I knew who I was and what had happened. Despite the initial composure, every so often I'd go back into trip mode and become terrified again. If the clock wouldn't change, I'd think all hell was about to break loose (but only on a grander scale because obviously the hallucinations are much more powerful if I'm walking around and trying to be sane.) I tried to call people and no one answered, the TV remote stopped working properly for a period of time, and the TV channels kept repeating themselves.
About an hour after THAT I tried to change the TV channel again and since it was now morning I turned on the local news. There were newscasters but their faces were like aliens and I had NO IDEA what they were saying. It's like I lost all concept of english (which is apparently called word salad for schizophrenia sufferers) During this new phase where schizophrenia was really strong, I kept feeling wetness on areas of my body (like something dripped on me) like my neck. I'd go to feel where the wet spot was, and my finger would get wet but then when I looked at my finger or the area, it was completely dry. Colors were all in metallic shades, and I kept seeing something under my desk (but it was amusing and not as scary as the thing in my backyard earlier) I kept hearing the evil laughs, but they were fading out and eventually I must have passed out from all the benadryl.
When I woke up the next day I was extremely paranoid and I've been slightly paranoid for a week since that I'm going to end up back in the trip, however I can't help but think I learned a lot (though I haven't figured out what) from the witnessing of what appeared to be time and dimensions (when I do something, there are infinite alternate versions of what I did so I should try to do only good things). Even though the trip was what I would call TERRIBLE I think it was my fault for trying to end it 4 hours early and expecting it to ACTUALLY end 4 hours early. I should've enjoyed it for what it was worth, kept the music on, and chilled the fuck out. Taking too much diphenhydramine (a delerient) probably compounded the effects of being trapped out of reality, but then what stops the fear of breaking my teeth?
I don't want to rule out 2C-I or other psychedelics because they definitely have a lot to teach when used correctly and respected, obviously 20mg (an intermediate but slightly higher than usual dose) was too much, but would 1-5mg still cause such terrible effects?
Is this type of bad trip normal for a first trip and will the effects subside when trying again? I've read countless experiences of 2C-I but none really share any similarities with mine, which is why I made this thread.
I'd like to know what other people would do in my situation. Never use psychedelics again because the first experience was bad, or try it again with the knowledge you've gained?
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![:\](https://bluelight.org/xf/BL_Images/Orig_Emoji/wrygrin.gif "wry grin :\")
