Does brain heal...

[Shambles]

^ Sorry but that's just plain stoopid. How the hell does the fact he bought LSD illegally make his situation any better or worse? If he'd been able to buy it legally he would at least have access to some follow up treatment afterwards that maybe understood the issues and perhaps just a bit of education beforehand to help prevent them. He didn't use irresponsibly. He tripped on LSD. Once. And is now having a hard time reintegrating. Hardly irresponsible. If it were legal he would have also known for sure what he was taking and at what dose. And been able to speak to a doctor or psychiatrist about it honestly if needed afterwards.

^LOL, in my personal opinion he should begin drinking heavily at once. :D

Ha! I did/do that too but wouldn't recommend it what with it causing/exacerbating anxiety and all that

 

[Te0X2t]

Honestly smoking a nice joint having a cup a tea and some light exercise before hand with a nice long sleep with some sleeping pills always helped me come off a trip hang off.

 

[Shambles]

Cannabis can fuck people up in a big way too. I wouldn't recommend it in this situation. The tea and exercise are good ideas though

 

[nasir~]

Sorry, might sound a little offensive, destructive and nasty to a lot of people, but I feel I just had to write down some of my angered thoughts.

this is _so_ ridiculous!

YEAH, the 'spiritual'-component is something that that is not bugging YOU, pretty obvious...
Stop pretending! Stop lying to YOURSELF! Please.! 8)

Seriously, I hope you will get 'better' soon and be able continue living as you have been before your 'brain injuries'.

I have a feeling I know what your life was( is?! ) before that horrible day.
yeah, a "VERY intelligent person", of course-i mean, your going to a UNIVERSITY(THE best in town! WOW!, which obviously proves you must belong to the intellectual elite.

Well liked by your peers, parents and most _sane_ people... just a pretty successful person with a well planed bright future.

good luck.

 

[skinwalker]

Shambles.......so here goes the big drug debate, which I shoulda knew my previous post would stir up.
What constitutes responsible use?? IMO knowing all the potential risks associated with the chemical being consumed, including integration as well as other side effects.
Which brings up another concept "Intention". Why did he go forward on taking the acid? It was either to explore some sort of new insight about himself through direct experience or to experience the high itself. Too many times have I seen people do psyches to get as fucked up as possible which to me is the wrong way of going about it. Sure experimentation can be fun but there is that risk of having unattended consequences.
The guy who first introduced me to acid is now in solitary confinement in an upstate maximum security penitentiary serving a life sentence for stabbing his prosecuting attorney with a six inch blade he smuggled into the courtroom.
I am with you on wanting to see these chemicals unprohibited, but these issues don't help the argument any. Supported mostly by fear propagating media and politicians!
OP still no offense, take this is as a learning experience, which life pretty much is one big learning experience. Unfortunately your having to learn like many of us "the hard way". Take the good advice that has been given so far and know that you aren't the only one to go through what you are. Many of us have gone through some difficult experiences with these chemicals and we (at least the smart ones) learned that they should be treated with the utmost respect- from my experience these chemicals aren't shy on letting you know when their not being respected and will mop you off the floor with yourself.
Again good luck on your journey you will see that over time you well get better and hopefully see the good out of this matter. Unfortunately, once we go so far down the rabbit hole there really is no turning back.

 

[Shambles]

Curiosity, exploration or just wanting a great, fun time - all are perfectly valid and responsible reasons for wanting to take acid for the first time, in my opinion. Which combination of reasons was most important to the OP would be for him to say but after reading his other threads it doesn't strike me as anything out of the ordinary. Acid just doesn't suit everybody - can't know unless you try it though.

The point remains, if it were legal he would have easier access to accurate information before using so he'd have a better idea of what he's letting himself in for, he'd know for sure he got the right drug at an appropriate dose, and would be able to access support if needed after the experience. As it is he's got BL - great but not quite the same level of support and information that would be available with legal acid.

This is not the thread for the legalisation debate really (there's one ongoing in PD already) but I totally disagree with your comment about things like this being examples of why it should stay illegal. Legalisation probably wouldn't have stopped the bad experience happening but would at least minimise the potential damage and concerns he clearly has and has nobody to turn to to discuss in the real world.

 

[SecondPull]

mrdocat,

I feel like this thread has taken a turn toward the hostile, which it shouldn't...everyone here wants to help you out, or they wouldn't have posted on the thread in the first place. They're frustrated because you, who are much, much less experienced in matters of a psychedelic nature than they, are insistent that something bad has occurred for which there is no possible mechanism of action.

I've been where you are as, well--possibly more severely so, though I wouldn't dare to question your pain. What you are experiencing is something Western medicine and psychology has invented few tools to integrate: you are having a spiritual crisis. You can insist otherwise all you like, but this is what is going on. You can drug yourself to become numb to whatever is going on, but it will not resolve the issue, and will probably not even make you feel better.

What you are going to have to do is 1) recognize that the origin of this feeling is WITHIN YOURSELF. No one and nothing is doing this to you but you. It may not sink in right away, and that's fine. But you need to give it some honest thought and not dismiss it out of hand like you have been. And 2) you need to ask yourself 'why am i doing this to myself?' There is something going on beneath the surface of your consciousness that is trying to make itself known. It may be related to the content of your trip, it may not. A clue, though, is the incredible degree of anxiety you are experiencing as a result of this. Have you always thought of yourself as an anxious person, or does this seem to be a new feeling to you? Follow that anxiety down and see where it goes, and you may find some answers. Your insistence, too, that your life is perfect rings somewhat false. We can be leading good, fulfilling lives and still be carrying a great deal of pain and suffering around with us. Spend some time thinking about not what's going on in your life externally, but how you are reacting to it and feeling about it internally.

It would help us help you if you were willing to share with us the content of your trip, but it's not necessary--the only thing that is necessary is for you to acknowledge the nature of this crisis in order to move forward.

The problem is within you, the answer is within you, the universe is within you.

 

[any major dude]

It's an absurd, if it's doesn't cause physiological problems then what explains HPPD?

for most cases of HPPD, it is a psychological/perception issue somewhere in the brain, between the sensory organ and the final perception of it

There's a lot of debate about the physiology of HPPD, as it stands right now however, HPPD is a purely visual phenomenon. It is often comorbid with things like Depersonalization & Derealization, which are both common facets of PTSD. The latter tend to only occur if the experience in question was particularly negative or stressful. I'll go out on a limb and speculate that HPPD & PTSD (to varying degrees) do occasionally occur together, but aren't intrinsically related. PTSD has more to do with the malfunctioning of a negative feedback loop in the amygdala that results in excesses of coricosteriods, norepinephrine & dopamine (IIRC, someone correct me if i've gone off the farm here). Whereas HPPD is an alteration of some visual processing circuitry, probably in V1, and/or in V4 (my money's on V1 though ). I don't think HPPD is very well understood at the moment, though I believe a guy named Dr. Abraham has done a fair amount of research on it, and I think he treats HPPD patients. Might wanna shoot him an email if you have HPPD, but you haven't mentioned any visual alterations, so I doubt you have HPPD.

If you just read my posts you'd have noticed I didn't ask a single time for a answer from you, all I asked was a link to a forum where I can get professional help, I just talked about my history because there could be people interested, now or after.

greenmeanies in some cases HPPD is clearly physiological, though.

I still don't feel like you've accurately described your symptoms... Just that you feel sluggish & haven't been performing as well in school. Those things are very non-specific and quite possibly unrelated to HPPD or LSD.

NOW! For instance! I just woke up with one of the worst feelings that I ever felt. I can't describe this but it is really bad, I simply don't know what it is and it started when I took LSD. Man what's that. WTF.

EDIT: Oh god what was that. That happens almost every night. I wake up feeling really weird sensation on my head like I'm dying and with surreal thoughts. Please someone explain that event. This night I managed to think good things and it calmed me down. I was thinking 'dont worry <myself> I have an idea, a remedy combination will heal you'. That made sense for me, so I calmed down and managed to sleep. But seriously what the fuck is that?

This sounds a bit like sleep paralysis & Hypnonomic hallucinations. I used to experience this quite frequently, and while it may well have been related to drug use, the drugs i was using at the time weren't psychedelic. This is a fairly common thing, and in most people it dissipates with a little time. Things like alcohol, sleep medications, and stress make it worse and more likely to persist.

And most of the rest of your posts sounds like what will be written down as Anxiety/Depression NOS on a diagnostic chart at a Dr. or Psychologist's office. There are about a billion different treatments for that. In the short term things like benzos can be helpful, but they shouldn't be used as a maintenance medication as they're quite addictive. There are numerous herbal remedies, not really sure how well any of those work, never really tried them, and there's good old fashioned counseling/psychotherapy, which seems like its probably your best bet at this point. If that fails i might look at medication, but that road seems to always lead to more problems of one sort or another. LSD can trigger anxiety in people, and I'd say its not all that uncommon, but it usually fades with time. However if you focus on it, as you seem to be doing, you can definitely exacerbate the problem, so try & calm down, maybe take a day or two off of work or school and relax.

 

[mrdocat]

@Skinwalker and others,
OKAY. Didn't offend me. But I don't think it was an irresponsible use because I've searched A LOT before using LSD and yet had no idea it would happen to me. OK, I knew LSD can trigger some horrible things, but I read it was extremely rare, like those daily risks that are there but doesn't stop us from doing things. I think there are many wrong information around and seems like some sites try to hide the bad part. I read things like 'only LSD fits in a blotter so it's safe' - 'LSD the most safe drug ever' - 'LSD rated the less dangerous drug for your body' - 'LSD can't cause addiction' etc. etc. everywhere but I just realized that's not the true truth.

@SecondPull,
Very wise words, thanks. And about your question the trip was very good. I'd certainly do it again if it didn't, well, fuck me. The first effect I noticed was strong lights at +1h, followed by things changing shape and form, the big kaleidoscopic hologram that covered my sight and things breathing very hard at about +2h. Lots of details and patters everywhere and a strong sensation of wellbeing. Cool parts included listening to music, playing videogames, watching psychodelic-vortex videos, talking to and playing soccer with friends, exploring the world and - one of the most epic memories of my life - riding a bike full speed when a monstrous rain fell down - that was just EPIC. FREAKING EPIC. Things started to turn out when I noticed the trip was lasting longer than expected. At +15h I could still see remains of the big kaleidoscope. I panicked.

@any major dude
I think I know who you are talking about, can you give me it's contact informations? Are HPPD and psychosis correlated? In the sense that, for instance, if you fix HPPD you are probably fixing whatever LSD 'broke' in your brain, so you'd be fixing the psychosis and stuff? In other words, will trying a treatment that worked for HPPD have good chances of working for me?

I can't give precise descriptions of my symptoms because they're not precise. There's nothing major, just small things that sum up in that overall feeling that something's wrong. My vision is definitely worse, those hypnopompic problems are scary, and I fell different mentally (less patient, sluggish and with difficult to concentrate, light memory problems). With that, I end up 'performing' worse in my daily activities like playing soccer, acting socially, reading, studying and even small things - what makes me anxious and depressed. And there's also the fear of not knowing what's going on and if I'll heal. I'm a very paranoid with that. I need to know what's going on pharmacologically in order to feel ok. Unfortunately it's not like when I broke my metatarsus that I had good explanations of what was going on and what to expect. I'm on dark and though I have found some people who reported a similar situation, they never came back to say if they got better! I wonder if they never got better or if they just didn't came back to say so. Reading a report of someone who had success on getting rid of this, and knowing what he did for that, would be very nice. If someone here know any please send to me.

About Hypnopompic Hallucinations, don't know. There's nothing visual when I wake up, it's just a really feeling of EXTREME heaviness, an extreme irrational unexplained FEAR, and ridiculous thoughts (like "I'll mix 2 pills to get the cure" making total sense to me - strange, not?). I will read more about that, though. Giving me names is cool. Thanks.

Sorry I just realized I wrote a text, you don't have to read it all, OK? *facepalm*

@All
Today I tried again to forget the problems and I actually managed to do very well. It was a 'happy' day, but, sadly, 2 unrelated people noticed I was 'extremely anxious'. A medic (not related, just liver stuff) and a shopman. They both asked: "are you OK? You look anxious". I suppose that if they went as far as asking that then I probably was indeed veeery anxious. Sad, because I felt I was completly normal today and almost didn't think on my problems. =\
Also my girlfriend said I improved today though I still got some 'autist' moments randomly.

 

[SecondPull]

@SecondPull,
Very wise words, thanks. And about your question the trip was very good. I'd certainly do it again if it didn't, well, fuck me. The first effect I noticed was strong lights at +1h, followed by things changing shape and form, the big kaleidoscopic hologram that covered my sight and things breathing very hard at about +2h. Lots of details and patters everywhere and a strong sensation of wellbeing. Cool parts included listening to music, playing videogames, watching psychodelic-vortex videos, talking to and playing soccer with friends, exploring the world and - one of the most epic memories of my life - riding a bike full speed when a monstrous rain fell down - that was just EPIC. FREAKING EPIC. Things started to turn out when I noticed the trip was lasting longer than expected. At +15h I could still see remains of the big kaleidoscope. I panicked.

Ok, now we're getting to the bottom of things. A panic experience on a psychedelic drug is orders of magnitude more intense than one while sober. When I had a panic attack on LSD+MDMA, I decided I was either schizophrenic or consensus reality as I had previously known it did not exist.

Afterwards, I had some PTSD-ey symptoms (not really diagnosable, and I don't think you are either, so don't get carried away and start looking up treatments...it's not really appropriate for your situation). But you did experience a trauma, and what's worse, it was kind of self-inflicted, so it's hard to get away from it. That, IMO, is the root of your current anxiety.

So what to do about it? Here is something that helped me:
when you start bugging out, don't run away from it. Find where the anxiety is physically located in your body. A lot of people carry it as a tightness in their chest, maybe in your neck, maybe your stomach, whatever. There's a physical response associated with the anxiety, and you should try to find out where it's located.

Now, think for a minute about what that anxiety is made of. There's this physical feeling, right? And then there's a STORY you're telling yourself about it. It might be "LSD fucked me, my life is over," or "I'm mentally ill/brain damaged" or whatever. Doesn't really matter, because it's just a story you're telling yourself. Let go of the story, and all you're left with is an uncomfortable physical feeling. Try to sit with that feeling, relax into it, don't hide from it, and the troubles you are experiencing will vanish. When the anxiety returns, just repeat.

Remember, you are just telling yourself stories. Without the story, the feeling has no power over you.

 

[mrdocat]

That all makes lots, lots of sense, but there are problems. First, I was calm and happy today. I was not thinking on anxiety or in problems at all, and yet 2 unrelated people noticed I was 'anxious' and 1 person who knows me better than myself confessed I'm still a bit sluggish.

And if the root was psychologic then what explains the hypnopompic episodes? I was having good dreams in all of them and yet I woke up with that scary state that's both physical and mental. That's what hinders me from trusting it's all psychologic.

Today was certainly a happier day. The problem is I don't know whichever I'm improving or just getting used. Let's see how I do tomorrow. Good night, dude.

 

[SecondPull]

That all makes lots, lots of sense, but there are problems. First, I was calm and happy today. I was not thinking on anxiety or in problems at all, and yet 2 unrelated people noticed I was 'anxious' and 1 person who knows me better than myself confessed I'm still a bit sluggish.

And if the root was psychologic then what explains the hypnopompic episodes? I was having good dreams in all of them and yet I woke up with that scary state that's both physical and mental. That's what hinders me from trusting it's all psychologic.

Today was certainly a happier day. The problem is I don't know whichever I'm improving or just getting used. Let's see how I do tomorrow. Good night, dude.

Hahaha, are you serious?

If you feel calm and happy, then you are calm and happy. How in the HELL is someone who is not you going to tell you that you are anxious?

Whether you're improving or just getting used to it, who cares? You're in the middle of 'it,' whatever 'it' is, and you will pass through it when you are ready to do so.

 

[Roger&Me]

If you have been in the drug game (or life in general) a while you will have to face the fact that you can't trust anyone... not your friends, not your family, not authorities... and certainly not yourself!

First off, great post. The bolded part isn't quite true though, IMO. You can trust yourself, but not the part of yourself yakking away with the internal monologue in your head: that rat bastard will ruin you. The part of yourself you can trust is deeper, closest to the source.

 

[Legerity]

The bolded part isn't quite true, IMO. You can trust yourself, but not the part of yourself yakking away with the internal monologue in your head: that rat bastard will ruin you. The part of yourself you can trust is deeper, closest to the source.

That's nicely put. The inner voice in the head comes up with some crazy shit.

 

[DwayneHoover]

OK, we admt it... we've all been lying to you... we are all part of a vast evil conspiracy directly from Satan through Dr. Albert Hoffman, Timothy Lear and all His other Minions to destroy the youth of Earth: YES, your fears are totally correct - really LSD is just like draino inside the brain, and its still sitting in there, even MAKING MORE OF ITSELF, rotting rotting rotting away your innards. Soon you will start to notice soft spots in your skull... be careful to cover them in foil so you do not accidentally poke a finger through or something. 8) ( I mean, why to you think they call it ACID, BwaaaHAHAHAHAHA!)

Sorry man for being so sarcastic, but it was too hard to resist. I Mean REALLY! You truly are starting to sound like the world's biggest hypochondriac. I still think Dr. was onto something with the antipsychotic. I mean all this incessant whining is just starting to seem like you are just desperate for attention or something. Or nuts. Either/Or.

 

[mrdocat]

But mr.Pull and others, though I was happy and calm, I was still slow and retarded, and it IS a problem to me. I have to study, I have to drive a car, I have to take care of my girlfriend, family and friends and thus act socially not like a slug. Where I live it's not a safe place to walk distracted and dumb. That not to talk of the university and sports wich are both important for me. Getting used to this state can make my happy but is not good at all.

Dwayne hmm... okay. Not much to comment about that post, sorry.

 

[adrian89987]

You are mentally unable to drive a car?

 

[RandomGuy123]

But mr.Pull and others, though I was happy and calm, I was still slow and retarded, and it IS a problem to me. I have to study, I have to drive a car, I have to take care of my girlfriend, family and friends and thus act socially not like a slug. Where I live it's not a safe place to walk distracted and dumb. That not to talk of the university and sports wich are both important for me. Getting used to this state can make my happy but is not good at all.

Dwayne hmm... okay. Not much to comment about that post, sorry.

Smoke some meth, that'll get you ontop of things.

 

[abore]

Troll. I love the title of this thread though. I'm gonna start saying "Does brain heal?" every time I'm intoxicated, shit will make me lol.

And what I think is happening is that anti-drug propagandists have discovered BL and determined that they resent it, so they decided to come here and tell piles of lies, fill the site with BS as part of their asinine battle plan, hence all these totally ridiculous "horror" stories

^This

 

[mrdocat]

Adrian I can drive but that's what I'm saying all the time, I'm sluggish, I can't deal with any situation where many things happen at once or where things happen too fast.

abore I'm not troll and that title is stupid

And Dwayne you are paranoid .-.