holla49na
Greenlighter
First post, hello bluelight.
I have been using MDMA for about a year now and have rolled about a dozen times. Needless to say the experience has changed A LOT for me over time, and continues to do so.
In this thread I want to discuss strange thought patterns, hallucinations, and other seemingly overlooked side effects of what most people consider to be just a dance/socializing substance.
My third time rolling was off of 200mg of MDMA and 100mg of MDA and I hallucinated pretty significantly. A few that I had was the presence of many more people in the room than were actually there, distant whispering voices of conversations that weren't happening, and the well known glasses hallucination. There was a coat rack by the door that very convincingly morphed into a person in my peripheral vision over and over. I saw a cat walk across the top of a couch adjacent to me, jump off, and disappear in mid air.
More recently I have felt less euphoric and the whole experience has started to become almost sinister in nature. Often a gleeful-sinister. I feel far less benevolent and cuddly and a lot more, well, evil.
It really started from going to raves and having kids come up to me with NASTY thizz faces on. Eyes rolling in the back of their heads, tongue gnashing around, and jaw clattering. I don't just find it ugly... it absolutely disturbs me to the point where I have to ask the person to not talk to me or leave me alone. There is something very unsettling to me about someone writhing around in an uncontrollable rabid state like that. I am in turn very nasty-thizzface conscious and a fair portion of my energy goes towards not looking noticeably high.
This whole disgust kind of snowballed and MDMA started to take on a very dark tone for me. Music, people, everything. When I look in the mirror at myself while rolling I look fearsome and a little crazed. I really don't like it.
I am one of the friendliest, outgoing, positive people you would ever meet but for whatever reason my thoughts tend to take a darker turn while on MDMA. I am diplomatic and never seek out violence or start fights, I'm usually the person separating two combatants
. 90% of my roll is always very positive and I have a good time but there is always the lingering thought in the back of my head that if I for some reason had to fight someone that I could absolutely destroy them while rolling. It's a very strange and foreign thought, especially for an empathogen and the type of person I am.
One night I was party hopping with a friend of mine while I was rolling (he was driving) and we ended up at a fairly sketchy one. I was in the bathroom taking a piss and the door flies open. This biiiiig black dude sticks his head in, looks around and leaves without saying a word. I shouted at him that I was done a few seconds later so he could use the bathroom. I heard him opening up every door down the hall with a slam and figured he was looking for someone. He started saying something like "where the fuck is katie, I'm gonna flip this whole damn place over. You better hope shes not here". I went out in to the hall and his back is facing me and I can see a pistol grip through his partially see through white shirt sticking out of his pants.
A few moments later in the kitchen I had a cup of water and he walks by me again and very purposely bumps my shoulder spilling half my water. In any other situation and on any other drug this would have been more than enough reason for me to leave right there. Big dude with a gun has random beef with me? Peace.
Except the "I can destroy anyone right now" thought returned. I didn't feel one ounce of anxiety, panic, nervousness. I had something between a strong urge and a full hallucination of taking a pointy magnet from the fridge and gouging it through his eye. Of course I didn't but for a few moments I had almost convinced myself that I did or that I was definitely going to.
The one thing that gives me a blinding almost animal instinctive utterly gripping fear while rolling is cops. Mother of god I cannot tell you how terrified I am of police while high. I often have hallucinations of police lights, or if I find myself driving or walking down a road at night every single car looks like a cop car.
Lastly I stumbled across the magic of playing beer pong (or something that takes similar eye-hand trajectory coordination) while rolling. I rarely drink alcohol if I roll so I had of course opted out of the game. I ended up finding myself subbing in for a friend with the agreement that when he came back I would step back out at the first shot I missed. That never happened as I made 9 consecutive shots. I'm normally somewhere between average and bad at beer pong usually.
Anyways, post your interesting or unusual rolling experiences or stories. I want to make sure I'm not alone!
I have been using MDMA for about a year now and have rolled about a dozen times. Needless to say the experience has changed A LOT for me over time, and continues to do so.
In this thread I want to discuss strange thought patterns, hallucinations, and other seemingly overlooked side effects of what most people consider to be just a dance/socializing substance.
My third time rolling was off of 200mg of MDMA and 100mg of MDA and I hallucinated pretty significantly. A few that I had was the presence of many more people in the room than were actually there, distant whispering voices of conversations that weren't happening, and the well known glasses hallucination. There was a coat rack by the door that very convincingly morphed into a person in my peripheral vision over and over. I saw a cat walk across the top of a couch adjacent to me, jump off, and disappear in mid air.
More recently I have felt less euphoric and the whole experience has started to become almost sinister in nature. Often a gleeful-sinister. I feel far less benevolent and cuddly and a lot more, well, evil.
It really started from going to raves and having kids come up to me with NASTY thizz faces on. Eyes rolling in the back of their heads, tongue gnashing around, and jaw clattering. I don't just find it ugly... it absolutely disturbs me to the point where I have to ask the person to not talk to me or leave me alone. There is something very unsettling to me about someone writhing around in an uncontrollable rabid state like that. I am in turn very nasty-thizzface conscious and a fair portion of my energy goes towards not looking noticeably high.
This whole disgust kind of snowballed and MDMA started to take on a very dark tone for me. Music, people, everything. When I look in the mirror at myself while rolling I look fearsome and a little crazed. I really don't like it.
I am one of the friendliest, outgoing, positive people you would ever meet but for whatever reason my thoughts tend to take a darker turn while on MDMA. I am diplomatic and never seek out violence or start fights, I'm usually the person separating two combatants
. 90% of my roll is always very positive and I have a good time but there is always the lingering thought in the back of my head that if I for some reason had to fight someone that I could absolutely destroy them while rolling. It's a very strange and foreign thought, especially for an empathogen and the type of person I am.One night I was party hopping with a friend of mine while I was rolling (he was driving) and we ended up at a fairly sketchy one. I was in the bathroom taking a piss and the door flies open. This biiiiig black dude sticks his head in, looks around and leaves without saying a word. I shouted at him that I was done a few seconds later so he could use the bathroom. I heard him opening up every door down the hall with a slam and figured he was looking for someone. He started saying something like "where the fuck is katie, I'm gonna flip this whole damn place over. You better hope shes not here". I went out in to the hall and his back is facing me and I can see a pistol grip through his partially see through white shirt sticking out of his pants.
A few moments later in the kitchen I had a cup of water and he walks by me again and very purposely bumps my shoulder spilling half my water. In any other situation and on any other drug this would have been more than enough reason for me to leave right there. Big dude with a gun has random beef with me? Peace.
Except the "I can destroy anyone right now" thought returned. I didn't feel one ounce of anxiety, panic, nervousness. I had something between a strong urge and a full hallucination of taking a pointy magnet from the fridge and gouging it through his eye. Of course I didn't but for a few moments I had almost convinced myself that I did or that I was definitely going to.
The one thing that gives me a blinding almost animal instinctive utterly gripping fear while rolling is cops. Mother of god I cannot tell you how terrified I am of police while high. I often have hallucinations of police lights, or if I find myself driving or walking down a road at night every single car looks like a cop car.
Lastly I stumbled across the magic of playing beer pong (or something that takes similar eye-hand trajectory coordination) while rolling. I rarely drink alcohol if I roll so I had of course opted out of the game. I ended up finding myself subbing in for a friend with the agreement that when he came back I would step back out at the first shot I missed. That never happened as I made 9 consecutive shots. I'm normally somewhere between average and bad at beer pong usually.
Anyways, post your interesting or unusual rolling experiences or stories. I want to make sure I'm not alone!
