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Need help with my Mother

MasterVampire

MasterVampire

Bluelighter
Joined
Nov 8, 2005
Messages
400
Location
Australia
Ok so heres the thing.

I smoke weed.
Its the only drug apart from Ecstasy I have ever done (and I've only use E about 5 times in my life)
I have no intent to try any other drug, even when I have had the opportunity to do so. It's my personal rule that I'll never try anything else and I have stuck by it for years.

Now about my mother. She knows that I smoke weed and she hates it.
My family had a bad experience a few years ago with my younger sister. When she used to smoke it she used to go crazy on it for some reason, violent, abusive, stealing and just caused alot of stress for my family. She also moved on and used speed and coke for a short time too.

It's like my mother is baseing weed souly on this experience with my sister and her talks with doctors/support groups.
She constantly keeps telling me that its a terrible drug, its fucking up my brain and it's going to ruin my life. Jesus, anyone would think I'm doing needles or snorting coke or something!

It's as if she likens weed to black tar Herion.

I've mentioned that you can get weed in Amsterdam and in some places its de-criminalized and her responce to that is that after being legal in Amsterdam "they" are only now discovering how it fucks up peoples brains (again with that)


It's really fucking annoying. When I smoke I don't involve anyone, I do it privatly, don't tell anyone, don't get violent or abusive, I don't need to steal and don't cause any problems. It also never effects my job. But still that not good enough for her.


Basicly I need some advice guys. I don't want to give up the green when I like it so much but I'm sick of her complaining. Maybe if I had some good rebuttal
information I could that shove down her throat or something.
 
My family had a bad experience a few years ago with my younger sister. When she used to smoke it she used to go crazy on it for some reason, violent, abusive, stealing and just caused alot of stress for my family. She also moved on and used speed and coke for a short time too.
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Your Mom has a good reason not to like it, as you stated- you are her kid. She's a protector and doesn't want the same thing to happen to you. I'm a Mom so I know how she feels.
I think the only thing that will change your Moms views is time. Time that goes by withOUT any incidents like your sister experienced.
Maybe you could sit down and have a heart to heart? Dont get mad at her- she doesnt want the scenario repeated, thats all.
 
^^ Wow, you said pretty much exactly what I was thinking.
MasterVampire said:
My family had a bad experience a few years ago with my younger sister. When she used to smoke it she used to go crazy on it for some reason, violent, abusive, stealing and just caused alot of stress for my family. She also moved on and used speed and coke for a short time too.
Click to expand...
This is an extremely disruptive experience for a family to withstand. I do not blame your mother in the slightest for having the concerns she has about the usage of a drug like weed, having gone through this experience with your baby sister. Remember, marijuana is a drug. It has a lot of addictive qualities just like nicotine and alcohol and anything else. Some people are genetically predisposed to having an addictive personality, and if your sister displayed traits fitting that description then your mother has a justified cause for concern regarding your drug use.

Please keep that in mind, and continue to be careful, like you have been.
 
Weed is addictive it can lead you down a path that's not good. Weed has a bad stigma connected to it. Do you know if your mom has tried any substances like.. Coke,LSD,Weed?
 
Perhaps you should present her with some quality info on weed as well as statistics and scientific info so that she may better understand it. Many parents place weed in the same categories of harder and harsher drugs because they don't fully understand this wonderful plant. But when it's all said and done, what's more important....family or drugs? You gotta view things from her perspective if you want her to do the same for you... :\
 
MasterVampire said:
Ok so heres the thing.

I smoke weed.
Its the only drug apart from Ecstasy I have ever done (and I've only use E about 5 times in my life)
I have no intent to try any other drug, even when I have had the opportunity to do so. It's my personal rule that I'll never try anything else and I have stuck by it for years.

Now about my mother. She knows that I smoke weed and she hates it.
My family had a bad experience a few years ago with my younger sister. When she used to smoke it she used to go crazy on it for some reason, violent, abusive, stealing and just caused alot of stress for my family. She also moved on and used speed and coke for a short time too.

It's like my mother is baseing weed souly on this experience with my sister and her talks with doctors/support groups.
She constantly keeps telling me that its a terrible drug, its fucking up my brain and it's going to ruin my life. Jesus, anyone would think I'm doing needles or snorting coke or something!

It's as if she likens weed to black tar Herion.

I've mentioned that you can get weed in Amsterdam and in some places its de-criminalized and her responce to that is that after being legal in Amsterdam "they" are only now discovering how it fucks up peoples brains (again with that)


It's really fucking annoying. When I smoke I don't involve anyone, I do it privatly, don't tell anyone, don't get violent or abusive, I don't need to steal and don't cause any problems. It also never effects my job. But still that not good enough for her.


Basicly I need some advice guys. I don't want to give up the green when I like it so much but I'm sick of her complaining. Maybe if I had some good rebuttal
information I could that shove down her throat or something.
Click to expand...

Have you considered that the reason you're smoking the green in the first place is because of her, i.e. to clear your head so to say? If so this could be early signs of depression and i'd be questioning the intention of the usage itself? You say it's fun, but how? I won't be a preacher but I can tell you from my own experience that everything does add up at the end, this happened to a colleague of mine also whereby he got psychosis. Overall if you think weed is fun, I can only question what you would think fun is when you stop weed? To stop yourself from creating bad behavioural problems for yourself, i'd suggest quit now and enjoy the extra bux in your pocket.
 
Maybe suggest she watches one of those documentaries that are out about marijuana and all the good things that it does and the legalization.
 
There is no amount of information that will overrule the experience she had with your sister. Your mother is justified to worry about your drug use, because she has seen what happened to another one of her children. Your mother loves you and clearly just wants the best for you.

Perhaps you should consider that you do not neccesarily know best in this situation. I know a lot of people who fucked up their lives who only smoked weed, some of them because they got arrested with it and some of them because they were so lazy and failed out of university, etc. Weed is not entirely without consequences as you seem to think. I think one day you will look back on this and see that your mother only had your best interests at heart.
 
Just laugh at your mom's ignorance. Any drug, or any person, can have a negative connotation.

Your mom cannot rationalize disliking her daughter, so she projects her issues with her daughter onto a plant, because it's easier to be angry at a plant than a person. (Well, it's not easier, it's just easier for someone with a "I can't hate anyone" moral complex)

Explain to her that she hasn't tried smoking weed, and you obviously are not a raging moron like your sister. If your mom can't realize that, then tell her you're not smoking weed, you're smoking flowers, and weed isn't a flower.

Weed is a flower in real life, but you could convince your mom weed is actually just drug material that is produced in a laboratory. She seems that impressionable, anyways. She would believe you too because you're not having psychotic episodes on it.

Lying to someone who has already been lied to may be portrayed as some horrible, dark evil by some Bluelight members, but I honestly see nothing wrong with it. If someone has been lied to many times over, lying to them once more does nothing but encourage them to seek out the truth for themselves.

Telling someone the truth when they have been perpetually lied to, is only a reason for them not to believe you "really? 12 morons told me something different...why would 1 smart person out weigh 12 morons?" , etc.
 
Haha, I like your thinking. There's a time and a place for the truth to be revealed.
 
C.H I almost ALWAYS agree with you wholeheartedly, on any given topic. But in this case I strongly disagree with your post. Sorry man.

You're making his mother out to be some kind of idiot who has no idea about anything. I for one can completely understand why she's so concerned about his marijuana usage, having gone through what she has with her daughter. She has a right to be so concerned about her son possibly getting in to any kind of harm or trouble with drugs. And from the sounds of the situation MasterVampire is still living at home so he should respect his mother's wishes and not smoke pot.

But that's just my opinion :)
 
Wow, Im almost 50. Been smoking weed for almost 35 years. Had an incredible career. Have NEVER had an issue with it. Never been a lying theiving heretic or whatever people think of it. Have 2 kids who choose to smoke it later in their teens who did so daily and have straight A's to prove it doesen't make you stupid. Both knew if they didn't keep the grades up they couldn't smoke. BTW they smoke daily. One has an excellent career and one has a full ride scholarship to a university. I now smoke more medicinally for a very rare chronic disease that there is no known cause or cure for and it would rather do that then take opiates when possible. I also run a 501 (c)3 Non Profit and answer a 24/7 help and suicide line for said disease and have for 10 years and would rather be on chronic then some of the shit that drs prescribe for said disease. I also have a very addictive personality but have never had an issue with herbs.......lol. Some of the hate mail I'm reading regarding smoke seems absurd to me. Interesting to say the least.

Yeah , I don't post a lot, but I do read daily so I am not as new as I appear to be.
 
^^ Hi ferrita, I'm really glad to hear of your positive experiences with weed and the way that it has helped you. As with everything in life, especially drugs/medications, marijuana effects everyone differently, and although many people like yourself react very well to weed there are a lot of people who react badly to it.

But for us to make educated decisions about things it is always important to hear the positive side, as well as the negative, so thanks for sharing :)
 
While I've never been in your situation, I have definitely been in your sister's. Talking "sense" to her isn't going to work, she is going to have to want to stop.

In your position the best thing you can do is continue to smoke the green and just try as best as you can to keep it under your mother's nose. I know it seems a lot better to be able to be completely open with someone you love, but some things are best left unsaid. If it isn't hurting your job, your school, or anything else then continue to do it for a while (while keeping it a secret) and then tell your mom that you have been smoking for the past however long. Then you can ask her if she even could tell a difference?

I used to be crazy, do a lot of drugs, steal from my family etc. I've cost them 30 grand in rehab and other drug things so I know how it is. Today I smoke some herb and occasionally do opiates but it is managed. I only do it after work and make sure I don't steal or anything else. However; I still keep it secret from my parents because I know what they've been through. They will fear for the rest of their lives I become a raging addict again and it's better to keep my drug habits to myself so that they don't have to worry.

That's the best advice I can give and I hope it helps you out.
 
n3ophy7e said:
You're making his mother out to be some kind of idiot who has no idea about anything. I for one can completely understand why she's so concerned about his marijuana usage, having gone through what she has with her daughter.
Click to expand...

Marijuana cannot cause any of the problems mentioned by his mother. I'd like to see some real evidence that marijuana would induce violent behavior in anyone. It's a poor scapegoat for her daughter's behavioral problems in this case. She's obviously not very informed, and her son seems to have demonstrated that she can't debate intelligently.
 
"How many murders, suicides, robberies, criminal assaults, holdups, burglaries and deeds of maniacal insanity it causes each year, especially among the young, can only be conjectured...No one knows, when he places a marijuana cigarette to his lips, whether he will become a joyous reveller in a musical heaven, a mad insensate, a calm philosopher, or a murderer..."
HARRY J ANSLINGER

Show her this and then politely point out that the effects of weed on you are clearly neutral at worst.



Then show her this to seal the deal:

"Marijuana may cause new cell growth in brain "
http://www.newscientist.com/article/dn8155-marijuana-might-cause-new-cell-growth-in-the-brain.html
 
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