Relapsed and about to be in a world of even more shit

[Georgie25]

So I've been clean from heroin after a 2 year daily IV habit. My dad found my rigs and confronted me, I admitted I had a big problem and he got me on suboxone. I havn't touched heroin since and that was 5 months ago...however about 2 weeks ago I was in the middle of one of my depressive episodes where I think either drugs or suicide is the only option to "help me" and of course during that time I get an invite from a friend to do some coke with him... I was doing really well at my new job up until this point, had saved about $400 from working part time for about a month. So I accept this "friends" offer and get dissapointling high. But the next day I crave for some actual good coke to shot to get an actual good high since it was a let down...long story short a week later I have blown through all my money and have no money until 2 weeks from now when I get my check. Worst part of all is on the 1st of the month I have to pay my dad for car insurance (170 bucks) and have no way of getting it right now..so it looks like I'm gonna have to admit about the relapse but I'm pretty scared because my dad said I only had one more chance and if I blew it again I'd be kicked out of the house (I'm 20 and go to college/work but wouldnt have any place to go)..

So my question is what would you do in my situation, how should I handle the inevitable talk I'll have with my dad?

 

[JohnnyHopkins]

Parents will never turn their back on you, at least they shouldn't. Of course your father will be dissapointed, but ultimately he wants what is best for you, and is on your side. I'm sure he would take on all of the pain/suffering/addiction if it meant that you were OK. Just be honest, that is extremely important. He may seek additional help for you(and you should swallow your ego/pride and listen/do what he says, as you can't afford to lose your father's trust in you), but no family is going to toss a child out with the trash, even if they threaten you with that,,,you can bet they regret saying that, and only say it because they don't know what else to do...

 

[User Name Here]

Be entirely honest with your father. I am willing to bet that if you admit everything to him ASAP, he will be understanding and will more than likely let you stay.

 

[edgewise1]

JH and UNH,my hat is off to you both, you have given the BEST advice I could imagine. There.is nothing else I can say that would add to what's been said!

Good luck Georgie!

 

[WSB15]

"Hey dad, at least I didn't do heroin"?

 

[RedLeader]

Georgie, how much does your father know about your depressive episodes? The way that I would begin this conversation would be by describing to him what lead up to this relapse - what exactly was going on inside of your head that was making you so upset and depressed. This may or may not be awkward pending on your relationship with your father, but I think you should let him understand the "why" behind the relapse. After talking with him about depression, then you can probably transition into the relapse.

On the surface, that might seem like a bit of emotional manipulation, and perhaps it is. But at the same time, your father knowing the full story here will likely make things go better.

Are you okay right now, though? I mean is the relapse over and you're back on the regular sub plan? I hope so. Like the others have said, parents often say things like "last chance" but ultimately are making empty threats.

 

[totach]

hey man, dont b hard on urself, I know it sux to relapse i remember u posting how ur dad started trusting u cuz u paid ur car insurance on time last month. So i think it would b a good idea to just be str8 forward with him and tel him bout the whole depression n all n that it just really got to u. Im sure he will be understanding especially since he saw such a great improvment in u in the past couple months. Its also really great of u for not doin dope n im sure he will be proud of u for that also. Most ppl would just say fuck it n go n do dope also but u didnt that takes alot man.
good luck wit ur pops man i think mayb it would b a good idea to show him ur posts on bluelight n let him c how far uve really come in the last 5 months.
stay up man : )

 

[User Name Here]

JH and UNH,my hat is off to you both, you have given the BEST advice I could imagine. There.is nothing else I can say that would add to what's been said!

Good luck Georgie!

Yeah, parents are [usually] so much more understanding and/or accepting of a child's addiction issue(s) if said person is open and honest about their struggles. Almost no parent out there will hold a simple slip up against you as long as you're honest and express the fact that you truly want to better yourself and kick this habit once and for all. The sooner you tell him about everything the better he will handle it! Like I said before, I can almost guarantee that if you are 100% honest with your father, he will be much more likely to let you stay.

I mean think about it like this: addiction is a beast, and EVERYONE relapses at least once (at least everyone I've ever known). It's a part of the process. Now, this doesn't exactly make it okay and it certainly does not justify using once again, but it does help explain exactly how challenging sobriety can be. If you explain to your father that you are trying your best and giving it your all I am sure he will continue supporting you and your genuine endeavors =)

Once again, good luck with your sobriety! Take everything one step at a time and don't forget that you're only human, and everyone makes mistakes. Don't be too hard on yourself for this, okay? It happens. All you can do is learn from it and realize that in the end it makes you a stronger person if you are able to overcome it when all is said and done.