DustnRoses
Bluelighter
Yeah be careful man. I started lowering my dose of suboxone and then went out and grabbed some needles to start IVing it with the best intentions of lowering my sub dose to a point where I might be able to get a rush/high and get that needle fix too all without relapsing on heroin and other opioids. I tried to do what CH was/is doing thinking I could and I just wasn't ready and didn't have that type of self control so when I was taking under the equivalent of 2mg sublingual a day I had huge cravings for a high and due to the low dose and me not thinking rationally i went out searching for dope and relapsed.
If you look at my posts in the last two months you can see how everything evolved. I thought I could shoot suboxone for maintenance and get a buzz but I wasn't ready and would advise most people to be very cautious when considering picking up a needle again and just not do it to be safe.
As another note, while the common consensus here is that bupe is over prescribed and the doses doctors give out is unnecessarily high there is a good reason for it. While 2-8mg may be able to hold most people from physical withdrawal it greatly increases cravings you wouldn't get at higher doses. Taking 4mg and under is dangerous simply due to the fact that there is minimal to no blocking effect and at 2mg you could go out and get as high as you want off full agonists. Combined with the increased cravings at low doses it is a huge risk and recipe for relapse. You should really only lower your dose working with your doctor and support group when you are ready and can minimize the risk of relapsing.
When I was IVing bupe daily I was fighting my urge to get a high by doing IV coke and ODed by myself and was lucky I didn't die. That made me rationalize even more that it would be safer and cheaper to just try doing heroin again then switching back to bupe without getting hooked. Well, it kind of worked and I was able to go back and forth between heroin/fentanyl (my two DOCs) and suboxone rapidly with hardly any withdrawal. I was a mess though, I thought I found the secret of being able to use opiates without being a fiend by rapidly switching back over to suboxone whenever I wanted or needed to. Looking back I was an emotional wreck, depressed, and it just didn't work. I'm glad to be back on a daily bupe dosage that reduces my cravings and wouldn't allow me to get high for days if I wanted to.
I still want to IV bupe again since I just love IVing drugs, but if it means I might fall down a similar path it isn't worth it. Myself and my loved ones can't handle another relapse. I am still very interested in and passionate about drugs and harm reduction which is why I come on here so often and hopefully I can make something positive out of my addiction and help others with the vast knowledge I have gained thanks to my experiences and everyone here on bluelight.
While this may be true for some, I don't think it is the most common case. Personally, just knowing that I have an opiate in my system (bupe), and not feeling WD's is enough to keep me off of drugs. Now I can understand how some addicts need to be slightly elevated from the typical feeling of daily dopamine/endorphin release, etc. but people like that are bound to fail or relapse eventually anyways...not to be cynical but at some point, you have to realize that always having a buzz isn't possible for your whole life...
I went on a tangent there and rambled but all in all, what I am saying is doctors DO over prescribe this stuff, and as long as you don't feel withdrawals, the bupe is doing it's job. All this shit about fighting off cravings is just junkie talk IMO. And before I get flamed to hell by junkies, I am a FORMER junkie, been down that path numerous times, detoxed cold turkey numerous times and done short tapers on suboxone, so I know what the fuck I am talking about. I tapered myself from a gram a day heroin habit with an 8 mg Suboxone over the course of a week. Withdrawals were VERY minimal and although I had cravings, you know what? TOUGH SHIT. You have to get on with life.
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