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If You are Thinking about Suicide, Please Read This

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My mom is the biggest asshole in the world.
She thinks that I'm using again (which I'm not) and she took my car keys.
And started fucking yelling at me, for no reason. Like okay fine, yell at me because I'm smoking in the house, but don't go on about how I don't do shit, as if she does anything. Now, she's like rambling on about my dad (who by the way died last month) and she's all like "idont give a fuck, he chose to die the way he did and there's nothing you can do anymore I never gave a shit" blah blah. Like fuck her, seriously.

And then to top it all off, my bestfriend in the whole entire world just fucking ODed and I try to go to the hospital to see him, and the nurse is all like, "Only family can visit, he's in the ICU" so I get mad and I'm like "Fuck you, I know him better than anyone of his other family members" she calls security and they make me leave. Fucking great.
 
i am an old lady....i have patience when necessary....i can sit here all night.i am not even fucked up.i got a headache n opted not to waste my stash..........start talking.not on AIM,here...in the community.where others can help u too.
 
Cap'n Jay said:
My mom is the biggest asshole in the world.
She thinks that I'm using again (which I'm not) and she took my car keys.
And started fucking yelling at me, for no reason. Like okay fine, yell at me because I'm smoking in the house, but don't go on about how I don't do shit, as if she does anything. Now, she's like rambling on about my dad (who by the way died last month) and she's all like "idont give a fuck, he chose to die the way he did and there's nothing you can do anymore I never gave a shit" blah blah. Like fuck her, seriously.

And then to top it all off, my bestfriend in the whole entire world just fucking ODed and I try to go to the hospital to see him, and the nurse is all like, "Only family can visit, he's in the ICU" so I get mad and I'm like "Fuck you, I know him better than anyone of his other family members" she calls security and they make me leave. Fucking great.
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k...good.1st things 1st.u won't help ur friend by bringing neg energy to the situation.ok.u need to focus all ur energy on good thoughts-all the good times.all the love.focus on that...feel it...and send that energy to him
 
next-let go of ur mom...if u truly love this person and want to help u have to let that go.u won't help him being filled w rage.i am 33 and have the same type fights w my mom-part of being the child.ok....so u send him love...then u focus on is recovery.fill your heart and soul w healing energy-send it to him.
 
r u calm?bc i need to ask u some questions.and i need u to calm urself.i need u to open ur mind and not take anything personally.i am not here to tear u down but i need some info b4 we go on
 
She took them after I went. I think because of his OD she thinks I'm using again.
 
RedLeader said:
I know this might not be the most pleasant of options, but if you really are not using again, suggest taking a drug test to prove it to her?
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I'm not using dope anymore, but there's everything else.
Which I'm actually honest to her about.
 
i told u i had a horrible accident...i should have died,but i did not.when i woke i got better bc i had the will to.the will to live is a powerful healer.ow will he feel when he finds out u committed suicide?do u see were i am coming from?
 
jay?....i care,i do.my heart is so big it almost bursts from w/ in me at times.please tell me u understand...YOUR LIFE IS IMPORTANT.YOU ARE WORTH EARNING A HAPPY LIFE.YOU ARE SO YOUNG AND YOU ARE IN CONTROL.ONLY YOU CAN MAKE UR LIFE WHAT U WANT IT TO BE.AND I BELIEVE THAT YOU CAN.I BELIEVE IN U.NOW IT IS UR TURN.BELIEVE IN U.THERE IS GREAT POWER AND RELEASE IN BELIEVING.I BELIEVE IN U.
 
It's so fucking hard, like not just now. But it has been for the last month and a while.
I've tried and I've ignored it. I can't loose anyone else from an OD. He'd be the third. And I can't do anything to help. He's my bestfriend and I love him soo much. Why the fuck wouldn't she let me see him? Like, I'm not going to go in there and kill him. I just want to see that he's okay. And I can't.
 
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