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Experiences Making the decision, commiting to the idea of no god

M!$TER-ED

M!$TER-ED

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Not until recent I fully committed to the idea of god's existence being a personal choice rather than an undeniable truth of cosmic reality. Growing up as a southern baptist preacher's kid was confusing seeing dad behind the pulpit in a different light than the congregation and community image he portrayed did nothing to ensure my faith in god or my father, the preacher. It was a spoken rule our family abided by our role was to support my dad and his ministry no matter the costs. This included mandatory attendance for church and church activities. We were not to question my father or his motives, we were not to share family issues or concerns outside of family jurisdiction, as children my brother's and I did not question decisions made by parents

Time went on, I discovered freedom from parental authority in my junior year of high school, dad bought a house near Atlanta Ga and my brother and I had our own entry way with bedrooms downstairs in a finished basement. We seldom mingled with parents, we had our own lives to live. Nonetheless that did not prevent us from attending in support of my dad. There came a time one Sunday morning I refused to drive mom and brothers to church. After that I think I was on black list for nonconformity.

Not until end of last year I decided to cut ties with god and religion. Up until then I researched various information regarding god, church and religion all of which pointed to what I suspected all along. It's had to adjust my thinking I no longer depended on god because in my eyes and mode of thinking god did not exist so praying was out, I couldn't ask god for anything any more. I set forth the belief that I alone was accountable for any and everything associated with my life. I took full responsibility for past, present and future actions. This meant having to make amends to people I harmed in the past, if it was impossible to reach them I asked myself for forgiveness to all matters of concern. Now it was up to me not to intentionally cause harm to anyone,

I think I live better now by taking responsibility of me instead of relying on god's authority as a means of my behavior. When I played Christian, I was always giving praise to god for every little thing, nowadays I give myself credit for accomplishments and setbacks if they happen. I like being in control, it's a mindset that many people fail to recognize.
 
Add on, what a person believes is by choice. The ability to choose is all that is sacred to the individual's choice. Religion is but one way of a person's choosing, there are other systems of belief that are equally as important as the person who chooses them.
 
Religion, faith, god church and all of the above are merely byproducts to what I'm really talking about...the human condition.
 
It is interesting to see how Americans consider and express their relationship towards religion and belief (which are two different things); It seems to be a rather all or nothing approach to the subject - surely partially driven by a person's relationship to the cultural norm and consequently, authority.

I used to be much the same way, but have since begun to approach the subject with much more fluidity. 'God' is much more of a hyperbolic concept to me, though you could say in ways I still believe it in some capacity owing to my many transcendental/chemical experiences shaping how I see the universe. After all that however, I still consider myself a 'Christian' on the grounds that Christ (the guy) - or whoever wrote on his life, wanted to mean something - and the writings are something that I can identify with and apply to my own life. I understand that in these southern baptist churches, 'God' is interpreted more literally as a guy who is looking to help you out if you talk to him and say some magic words.

The institutional structure of religion is something else entirely. Many will associate this with the whole but that could not me more incorrect. It is essentially just the social norms that bind a community together, much like how the state works. There are good clerics/administrators just as there are bad ones.

Another facet of 'church' is the community which upholds these norms, values, and traditions. (=culture) This is actually the biggest reason that anyone joins/maintains membership in a religion; anybody who tells you anything otherwise is lying to you and themselves. I admittedly also stopped going to 'real' church a long time ago. I don't like the overall lack in diverse thought about spirituality. A 'church' can really be anything; all it is is a bunch of people getting together who believe similar things and get along. Find your church.

Organised religion is fundamentally flawed, but unfortunately socially required and here to stay (likely forever). Most people cannot (as I'm sure you've seen) think/act for themselves, and need a shepherd's guidance. We are still animals, after all.

I'm glad to hear that you feel more fulfilled to be living for yourself instead of attributing everything to 'God' That sort of independance is the single greatest asset man can have. I know you might be done with church, but church is not done with you yet. You still congregate with your mates on the weekend, spend time with your family, and interact with all these lovely people on BL forums.
 
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