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What's your afternoon fix? are you missing anything today?

Major depression morning and then nearly had a panic attack. Yesterday evening with my friend was fun though, but maybe that just makes it harder having no reason to feel depressed .—.

- 35-40mg IC-26
- bunch of vaped weed

Feeling better now and going to hangout with my best friend, but still that sad thought of knowing I’m relying too much on the IC-26 to function right now.
 
~40mg of O-DSMT (hopefully it gets rid of my raging headache right now). Now, what is missing? Oh let me tell ya. My cat is beyond sick. Two ER vets so far, and nothing. How does one leave the vet even more confused than when they came in? A regular vet was a lot more useful today. She was actually straight with me, unlike the ER vets, who were useless. I'm so damn sad. I sobbed for the entirety of the vet visit. This is just not fair.

Jaundice is present, she's barely eating, and she's very lethargic. Blood work shows what was basically already known, and the ultrasound didn't show anything definitive. I hate this. They gave her a few shots, so hopefully this little rascal feels better soon.

I would give a kidney, an arm, an eye, anything, for this cat. It hasn't even been a full year since I adopted her. Undersized party hats are on their way to celebrate her 1-year adoption birthday a little early.

I wish I could make a deal with the devil right now. I'd become a vegetable just to have this cat for another year. She's balling out on buprenorphine right now, passed out on me.

Love your pets with all your heart. I've never cried my eyes out like this before. I didn't even know it was possible to be this sad.

Welp, rant over, time to get barely any sleep for another week or two. Take it easy fellas.
 
TheLightBringer said:
Interesting, its the extended carbon of nimetazepam which is supposedly one of the most euphoric benzos. What benzodiazepine would you compare N-ethyl-Nitrazepam to?
Click to expand...
Hmm, I've never really been the best at comparing drugs, especially benzos. Its duration fits somewhere between alprazolam and lorazepam. As for effects, I'd say it's more like diazepam, mainly due to its impeccable muscle relaxation. I wouldn't call it sedating or hypnotic, mildly sedating at most, and fairly clearheaded. I couldn't fall asleep on it alone.

My cat being so sick has me absolutely gutted. I had a full-blown panic attack last night for 4 hours in bed. Took 1mg of clonidine, 100mg of trazodone, and I said fuck it and popped an extra 0.5mg clonazepam because it was getting unbearable.
 
I had a good Kratom high yesterday afternoon just by adding 24 extra hours (72 total) of abstinence. Sitting in my car now (9pm) on 300 mg gabapentin, thc and nicotine. Caffeine too actually. I already took 1g of gabapentin in the am so cant really take more.
 
afternoon after work fix.

40mg of methadone (on a 2 mg per day dependency)

40 mg valium (not dependent)

10 mg edible

starting to get pretty high.
 
crazyotter87 said:
~40mg of O-DSMT (hopefully it gets rid of my raging headache right now). Now, what is missing? Oh let me tell ya. My cat is beyond sick. Two ER vets so far, and nothing. How does one leave the vet even more confused than when they came in? A regular vet was a lot more useful today. She was actually straight with me, unlike the ER vets, who were useless. I'm so damn sad. I sobbed for the entirety of the vet visit. This is just not fair.

Jaundice is present, she's barely eating, and she's very lethargic. Blood work shows what was basically already known, and the ultrasound didn't show anything definitive. I hate this. They gave her a few shots, so hopefully this little rascal feels better soon.

I would give a kidney, an arm, an eye, anything, for this cat. It hasn't even been a full year since I adopted her. Undersized party hats are on their way to celebrate her 1-year adoption birthday a little early.

I wish I could make a deal with the devil right now. I'd become a vegetable just to have this cat for another year. She's balling out on buprenorphine right now, passed out on me.

Love your pets with all your heart. I've never cried my eyes out like this before. I didn't even know it was possible to be this sad.

Welp, rant over, time to get barely any sleep for another week or two. Take it easy fellas.
Click to expand...
Wishing the kitty a healthy recovery 🙁
 
TheLightBringer said:
Wishing the kitty a healthy recovery 🙁
Click to expand...
Her condition has not improved. She is scheduled to be put down tomorrow at 4:20 PM. I believe she is suffering; she is still not eating anything. Boiled chicken and rice? Nope. Kibble? Nope. Wet food? Nope. I believe the most profound act of love I can do for her right now is to end her suffering tomorrow. I celebrated her adoption birthday a bit early today; it's almost been a year since I've had her. She won't even eat baby food right now, and she fricking loves chicken baby food. She won't even eat a Churu; that shit is crack for cats. It's been a wonderful run with her. I'd do it all over again. I think I did my best with her. She is currently lying on me. Soon she will retreat to her cat bed, which is directly next to my bed. Her liver is not in good shape right now; it's definitely a symptom of her not eating, and it may also be the cause. Who knows. The vet doesn't. I spoke with her twice on the phone today and she believes it is the right thing to do. I was planning on Monday, but I can't stand seeing her like this. This is not the life she deserves.

Not the afternoon, but 60mg O-DSMT and 2mg etizolam.

ibb.co

IMG 0484 hosted at ImgBB

Image IMG 0484 hosted on ImgBB
ibb.co ibb.co
 
crazyotter87 said:
Her condition has not improved. She is scheduled to be put down tomorrow at 4:20 PM. I believe she is suffering; she is still not eating anything. Boiled chicken and rice? Nope. Kibble? Nope. Wet food? Nope. I believe the most profound act of love I can do for her right now is to end her suffering tomorrow. I celebrated her adoption birthday a bit early today; it's almost been a year since I've had her. She won't even eat baby food right now, and she fricking loves chicken baby food. She won't even eat a Churu; that shit is crack for cats. It's been a wonderful run with her. I'd do it all over again. I think I did my best with her. She is currently lying on me. Soon she will retreat to her cat bed, which is directly next to my bed. Her liver is not in good shape right now; it's definitely a symptom of her not eating, and it may also be the cause. Who knows. The vet doesn't. I spoke with her twice on the phone today and she believes it is the right thing to do. I was planning on Monday, but I can't stand seeing her like this. This is not the life she deserves.

Not the afternoon, but 60mg O-DSMT and 2mg etizolam.

ibb.co

IMG 0484 hosted at ImgBB

Image IMG 0484 hosted on ImgBB
ibb.co ibb.co
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Breaks my heart, any idea what shes suffering from? Did she eat any medication off the ground, any parasites?

Dont wanna give you false hope but a buddy of mine had a cat with similar symptoms, they were going to put it down but he insisted it might be that certain parasite(I cant remember the name) and they gave it medication and it pulled through.
 
3 hits of blotter
oevuvk7.jpeg
 
TheLightBringer said:
Breaks my heart, any idea what shes suffering from? Did she eat any medication off the ground, any parasites?

Dont wanna give you false hope but a buddy of mine had a cat with similar symptoms, they were going to put it down but he insisted it might be that certain parasite(I cant remember the name) and they gave it medication and it pulled through.
Click to expand...
My heart is broken, but I came to terms with it last night. I actually didn't cry too much today. I'm still not sure what happened to her. She didn't get into my minoxidil or any of my benzos. I don't think it was a parasite, I really hope it wasn't... Was your friend's cat vomiting? Orchard never vomited. At least I'm moving out of this place in a few days. It's too depressing being here now. I keep walking past my bedroom expecting her to be there. I'd do it all over again for her. It was a great year.
 
5-MAPB at 1:30pm. I miss my cat, time to roll.

EDIT: I am BEYOND floored ;)

EDIT 2.0: Sheesh, I redosed with small amounts twice, once at 2 hours in and again at 5 hours in. That’s something I will never do again. The comedown was rough. I was stuck in an in-between state for a few hours. On the bright side, I got a lot out of it and feel much better today than I expected. My God, 5-MAPB is amazing; it's a VERY sedating version of MDMA. Incredibly therapeutic, but also very hedonistic. What’s not to love about empathogens? I have some 5-APB as well, I'll try that out in a month or two. I expect it to be a more stimulating/intense version of MDA.
 
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gonna take another 100 mg of dxm
im currently on 100 mg dxm and 100 mg dph and the dxm is starting to wear off so im gonna redose
i will say i had a pretty good time halfway asleep for an hour
 
spypilot said:
gonna take another 100 mg of dxm
im currently on 100 mg dxm and 100 mg dph and the dxm is starting to wear off so im gonna redose
i will say i had a pretty good time halfway asleep for an hour
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I've always wondered, does DXM redose well? I don't think I've tried that yet. Also, assuming you have DXM extracted into a crystal form, is it vaporizable or insufflatable?
 
50 mg dph
275 mg Pregabalin
5 mg Diazepam - too much cravings, so took that despite knowing it makes me sleepy, but since I used Pregabalin too frequently these days thought it might not be enough 🙄
... So I wanted nothing but sleep while playing with my son, and decided I have to wake up a little. Too late for caffeine, so what do I have? ... 2c-b
Boofed 14 mg, turning into an enema 😅, but felt the come up instantly...
Was bit scared of the interactions with Kratom, so I read it up and found out why I can't trip: Kratom down regulates Serotonin receptors with chronic use, so psychs just can't work as they would... 💡
3,1 g red Kratom, little bit later felt better. Definitely nothing trippy going on, slight headache, but was awake, feeling drugged.
In the end fell asleep with junior much earlier than I wanted to, but ok... First time not waking up at 4 am...
 
Esperighanto said:
I've always wondered, does DXM redose well? I don't think I've tried that yet. Also, assuming you have DXM extracted into a crystal form, is it vaporizable or insufflatable?
Click to expand...
dxm is somewhat redoseable, sometimes its a bit hard to feel the redose
I have it in pill form
 
Esperighanto said:
I've always wondered, does DXM redose well? I don't think I've tried that yet. Also, assuming you have DXM extracted into a crystal form, is it vaporizable or insufflatable?
Click to expand...
I had a buddy who bought a bunch of DXM powder, cant remember if it was from india or whatever. But anyways he told me he used to snort large piles of 500 - 700mg at a time, although Im not sure if its any better than taking it orally or if he was just getting high from the drip, its metabolite DXO is a more powerful NMDA antagonist anyways
 
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