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Coming off Invega/Xeplion (paliperidone) injections v11

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rawbanana said:
everything hurts. I don’t want to die but what other choice do I have? Genuinely, it’s pure torture and I don’t see an end to it.
The shame is so powerful. It hurts
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Your other choice is to simply wait. Do you have friends and family?
 
I ripped through Alien Earth like a lil baby xenomorph last night and today and I was completely engaged in a way I had not been. It made me cry a lot, and it made me want to go hug my niece. It made me terrified and pissed off, and it also deeply touched me. Good shit.

I stopped smoking weed again because my wisdom tooth extraction is next week for real this time. Cannabis suppresses your emotions a little, I recommend using it (as long as your psychosis wasn't caused by chronic mental illness) and then quitting.

I am worried quitting will fling me into psychosis again, but we will see. If it does, I might have to quit for good. If it doesn't I'll take that as confirmation that it was Straterra and not quitting weed that did it.
 
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InvegaAnon said:
It will end, trust me. You said you started feeling better, right? Have you watched any good TV? If you haven't, maybe you can try a show?
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I’m watching nurse jackie it’s ok. I’ve been playing genshin impact… trying to distract myself but it’s not enough. I don’t even recognize myself anymore. How can I recover from this? It doesn’t seem possible at all….
 
I just can’t believe this happened to me! What a tragic loss… I was a beautiful person…. Even if I recover I’ll never get my authentic silly joyful quirky self again… I had such a wonderful personality and was gifted in a lot of ways. What a joke.

If karma is real those doctors will pay for what they did. I really hope they suffer.
 
rawbanana said:
I just can’t believe this happened to me! What a tragic loss… I was a beautiful person…. Even if I recover I’ll never get my authentic silly joyful quirky self again… I had such a wonderful personality and was gifted in a lot of ways. What a joke.

If karma is real those doctors will pay for what they did. I really hope they suffer.
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Whoever told you you won't get to be silly ever again is very wrong.
 
rawbanana said:
I’m watching nurse jackie it’s ok. I’ve been playing genshin impact… trying to distract myself but it’s not enough. I don’t even recognize myself anymore. How can I recover from this? It doesn’t seem possible at all….
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Have you tried therapy? You need real support. Maybe try a trauma specialist, this shit is traumatic.
 
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dont.jump said:
Good idea or maybe some kind of counseler not directly involved with medications so they will be less defensive.
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It's not all that uncommon for therapists to encounter people who had problems with medication before. Both of mine had other patients that had problems with antipsychotics at least.
 
An update, last night i did not sleep, awake all night, today i had unusually high energy. Not sleepy or tired today despite not sleeping last night. Developing sudden insomnia has scared me. Listening to songs previously felt unbearably emotionally painful, today didn't feel music the way i did in the past after invega. The weather dipped to the negative, wonder if that might have something to do with this.
 
Trueart2 said:
Nah, we might have 200-300 ping but we gotta play together. Let’s go into this and we can rotate who the game host is
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I might not buy bo7 anymore though, my brother told me battlefield 6 is much better and that cod nowadays isn't doing so well.
 
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