Coming off Invega/Xeplion (paliperidone) injections v11

[lukeflowz]

NI just can’t even imagine recovering from this

Same here, but what we think and what happens to us are different. I think nine months could still be considered early in the recovery phase, especially with more shots. I’m not sure how I’m gonna get through this either, but there is some hope.

Are there any previous hobbies you can still force yourself to do, even if you don’t enjoy them. For me it’s reading- I’m not getting much enjoyment out of it, but using it as a gauge or a frame of reference- in how I can measure if my anhedonia is going. If I feel enjoyment from reading novels again- I know I’ll be healing. Is there a hobby you can engage in that you could use as an indicator of gauging if you are recovering. Your art for instance, can you force yourself in doing some even in your state?

 

[rawbanana]

My cognition is getting worse over time. During the first few months I could play games and do puzzles. I was doing Sudoku and going on walks. Now I can’t concentrate. My problem solving skills are gone.

 

[rawbanana]

Same here, but what we think and what happens to us are different. I think nine months could still be considered early in the recovery phase, especially with more shots. I’m not sure how I’m gonna get through this either, but there is some hope.

Are there any previous hobbies you can still force yourself to do, even if you don’t enjoy them. For me it’s reading- I’m not getting much enjoyment out of it, but using it as a gauge or a frame of reference- in how I can measure if my anhedonia is going. If I feel enjoyment from reading novels again- I know I’ll be healing. Is there a hobby you can engage in that you could use as an indicator of gauging if you are recovering. Your art for instance, can you force yourself in doing some even in your state?

I hate to say it but it was easier during the first few months. Months 6-9 have been absolute hell.

 

[lukeflowz]

I hate to say it but it was easier during the first few months. Months 6-9 have been absolute hell.

I’m going to assume that there are three possibilities:
1-Partial recovery
2-Get worse
3-Remain the same as I am now

Too be honest with you, I’m scared that I’ll remain in this state but I’m not sure what will happen. The uncertainty of this medication and how it affects people varies in proportion (my presumption from reading these threads) that to form a conclusion on what’s going to happen won’t do me any favours. However I will be prepared. I’m sorry of what you’re going through and when you do make it through the other side in one piece- please stay on these forums and be a beacon of light for other victims of this poison. Anyway do you have any previous hobbies you can still force yourself to do ?

 

[Matthew01]

I feel so much pain and discomfort

 

[rawbanana]

I’m going to assume that there are three possibilities:
1-Partial recovery
2-Get worse
3-Remain the same as I am now

Too be honest with you, I’m scared that I’ll remain in this state but I’m not sure what will happen. The uncertainty of this medication and how it affects people varies in proportion (my presumption from reading these threads) that to form a conclusion on what’s going to happen won’t do me any favours. However I will be prepared. I’m sorry of what you’re going through and when you do make it through the other side in one piece- please stay on these forums and be a beacon of light for other victims of this poison. Anyway do you have any previous hobbies you can still force yourself to do ?

You wont remain the same. There will be changes.
I don’t feel exactly the same as I felt in the early days.
But I can’t necessarily say those changes are improvements. It’s more like my body is changing.

It’s kind of like a tornado has passed through my body and now it’s a barren wasteland. Like the damage was done and all of the components of my brain are in disarray. Not sure if it will rebuild itself. It it does it will take many years. I’m guessing 3-5 years for a full recovery if I can make it that far.

I just don’t know if I can suffer that long because life wasn’t even that good before this. I was struggling. I’m in loads of debt and I don’t have the skills to work a job. I think I have it worse than a lot of folks. Not sure what I’m still doing here honestly.

 

[InvegaAnon]

Hello hello, my clitoris is still kinda numb and my libido is still low, but I'm mentally mostly normal. I just have mild PSSD. I still feel blunted at times, others it's as if the emotional blunting has finally fucked off. I can't think about the past two years or I'll start crying. I'm capable of shoving my emotions down now, so I do and I think it's hurting me.

Everything looks and feel so sharp in my vision. I feel extremely present. No disassociation, no blunted awareness. I'm thinking a lot more.

 

[lukeflowz]

You wont remain the same. There will be changes.
I don’t feel exactly the same as I felt in the early days.
But I can’t necessarily say those changes are improvements. It’s more like my body is changing.

It’s kind of like a tornado has passed through my body and now it’s a barren wasteland. Like the damage was done and all of the components of my brain are in disarray. Not sure if it will rebuild itself. It it does it will take many years. I’m guessing 3-5 years for a full recovery if I can make it that far.

I just don’t know if I can suffer that long because life wasn’t even that good before this. I was struggling. I’m in loads of debt and I don’t have the skills to work a job. I think I have it worse than a lot of folks. Not sure what I’m still doing here.

Your analogy of the Tornado making it feel as a barren wasteland hits the spot. I feel like that but there may be fungi buried under the Barron wasteland, which can give rise to botanical life.

Chance seems to be a factor in recovering also. I think the timeline for recovery- starts at 10 months. Maybe start to experiment with exercise and diet and this may help you recover? I don’t know, it’s just a suggestion. Exercise for me now has a neutral effect- in that it helps me feel neutral as I can’t feel good about anything atm. Maybe when the levels of invega in my blood decreases, there may be less binding to my dopamine and serotonin receptors in that I can start feeling good.

About the unemployment man- I feel you. Just up until January this year I was working full time as a support staff, but after my psychotic episode I’m unable to work. I wouldn’t even bother trying now, as I’m too slow and have a blank mind. It would just be awkward. I hope around the 10-12 month mark- I may be able to return to work again.

 

[lukeflowz]

Hello hello, my clitoris is still kinda numb and my libido is still low, but I'm mentally mostly normal. I just have mild PSSD. I still feel blunted at times, others it's as if the emotional blunting has finally fucked off. I can't think about the past two years or I'll start crying. I'm capable of shoving my emotions down now, so I do and I think it's hurting me.

Everything looks and feel so sharp in my vision. I feel extremely present. No disassociation, no blunted awareness. I'm thinking a lot more.

It’s good how some of you recovered folks stay around, it gives me hope. Can you remember what month it was when you started to recover?

 

[rawbanana]

Hello hello, my clitoris is still kinda numb and my libido is still low, but I'm mentally mostly normal. I just have mild PSSD. I still feel blunted at times, others it's as if the emotional blunting has finally fucked off. I can't think about the past two years or I'll start crying. I'm capable of shoving my emotions down now, so I do and I think it's hurting me.

Everything looks and feel so sharp in my vision. I feel extremely present. No disassociation, no blunted awareness. I'm thinking a lot more.

Do you feel pleasure from music or good cinema? I miss that raw feeling of simple pleasures. I want things to feel pure again.

 

[rawbanana]

Your analogy of the Tornado making it feel as a barren wasteland hits the spot. I feel like that but there may be fungi buried under the Barron wasteland, which can give rise to botanical life.

Chance seems to be a factor in recovering also. I think the timeline for recovery- starts at 10 months. Maybe start to experiment with exercise and diet and this may help you recover? I don’t know, it’s just a suggestion. Exercise for me now has a neutral effect- in that it helps me feel neutral as I can’t feel good about anything atm. Maybe when the levels of invega in my blood decreases, there may be less binding to my dopamine and serotonin receptors in that I can start feeling good.

About the unemployment man- I feel you. Just up until January this year I was working full time as a support staff, but after my psychotic episode I’m unable to work. I wouldn’t even bother trying now, as I’m too slow and have a blank mind. It would just be awkward. I hope around the 10-12 month mark- I may be able to return to work again.

I get extremely wiped out from mild exercise. I have to lay down. Just no energy at all. It’s sad but these people drugged us and made us lesser. It’s very sad.

 

[lukeflowz]

I get extremely wiped out from mild exercise. I have to lay down. Just no energy at all. It’s sad but these people drugged us and made us lesser. It’s very sad.

My strength markers have decreased by around 60% since these injections. I’ve started going back to the gym, however I feel I’m more just going through the motions when I’m exercising. I’m basically just trying to keep what I have for the time being as I’ve put on weight. I hope that zest for life comes back, as with the energy that comes with that zest transfers well to strength training. I highly doubt I’ll get that feeling anytime soon.

In the meantime I’m restricted to who I am post injections and I have to work with what I have. Can you maybe go for a daily walk? Have you experimented with diet and supplementation. (I’m not sure how much these things make a difference and how much is actually placebo) you’re probably getting sick of these basic suggestions- but sometimes it’s the basics that we miss. Post invega weight gain would likely have an effect on how we feel.

 

[rawbanana]

My strength markers have decreased by around 60% since these injections. I’ve started going back to the gym, however I feel I’m more just going through the motions when I’m exercising. I’m basically just trying to keep what I have for the time being as I’ve put on weight. I hope that zest for life comes back, as with the energy that comes with that zest transfers well to strength training. I highly doubt I’ll get that feeling anytime soon.

In the meantime I’m restricted to who I am post injections and I have to work with what I have. Can you maybe go for a daily walk? Have you experimented with diet and supplementation. (I’m not sure how much these things make a difference and how much is actually placebo) you’re probably getting sick of these basic suggestions- but sometimes it’s the basics that we miss. Post invega weight gain would likely have an effect on how we feel.

I’ve gained about 30 pounds. Diet or caloric intake hasn’t changed much. I imagine once I start losing that weight I can confidently say I’m “healing.”

The winded feeling after some exercise is a huge concern for me. I always had what seemed like unlimited energy. I don’t go on walks nearly enough so I will try to get back into that.

It’s a long road to recovery. A long, painful road.

 

[lukeflowz]

I’ve gained about 30 pounds. Diet or caloric intake hasn’t changed much. I imagine once I start losing that weight I can confidently say I’m “healing.”

The winded feeling after some exercise is a huge concern for me. I always had what seemed like unlimited energy. I don’t go on walks nearly enough so I will try to get back into that.

It’s a long road to recovery. A long, painful road.

I’ve gone from an athletic natural bodybuilder to skinny fat in the course of this invega hellish journey.

I can’t imagine getting through the day without a daily walk for myself, but this is because of my akathisia. I can’t bring myself to a complete relaxation while I’m sedentary. (Except in the evening, just before sleep)

Can you still feel moments of relaxation ?

 

[Deleted member 592205]

Hey risperdalconsta are they going to do that dopamine brain scan for you?

Idk, I asked them but they at our first appointment but they hesitate

 

[rawbanana]

I’ve gone from an athletic natural bodybuilder to skinny fat in the course of this invega hellish journey.

I can’t imagine getting through the day without a daily walk for myself, but this is because of my akathisia. I can’t bring myself to a complete relaxation while I’m sedentary. (Except in the evening, just before sleep)

Can you still feel moments of relaxation ?

Yes I never had akathisia. I got the more sedative side effects. I think some people get restlessness and others get sedation.

I can’t imagine having akathisia it sounds horrible. Some users say that goes away fully by 4-6 months.

Even though I can get sleepy, I don’t feel like I can relax. I think relaxation requires dopamine.

 

[Deleted member 592205]

Yes I never had akathisia. I got the more sedative side effects. I think some people get restlessness and others get sedation.

I can’t imagine having akathisia it sounds horrible. Some users say that goes away fully by 4-6 months.

Even though I can get sleepy, I don’t feel like I can relax. I think relaxation requires dopamine.

We cannot feel comfort anymore, without comfort there is no relaxation.

 

[lukeflowz]

Yes I never had akathisia. I got the more sedative side effects. I think some people get restlessness and others get sedation.

I can’t imagine having akathisia it sounds horrible. Some users say that goes away fully by 4-6 months.

Even though I can get sleepy, I don’t feel like I can relax. I think relaxation requires dopamine.

It all comes down to the simple feelings we all miss. It’s been so long for me now, I’ve almost forgotten how it feels to just be able to relax I consider myself partially recovered when I can relax. I do have anhedonia as well, but not quite as bad. I kind of enjoy film, but more as a means of distraction and I don’t find myself fully appreciating moments that I would used to.

 

[rawbanana]

It all comes down to the simple feelings we all miss. It’s been so long for me now, I’ve almost forgotten how it feels to just be able to relax. I consider myself partially recovered. I do have anhedonia as well, but not quite as bad. I kind of enjoy film, but more as a means of distraction and I don’t find myself fully appreciating moments that I would used to.

Yeah it’s hard to be present anymore. I struggle with really bad anhedonia now. I had it a little bit before the drug and now it’s so much worse.

I never imagined that I would end my life. I never saw that for myself even when i was going through so much pain. But nothing I’ve ever gone through compares to this.

 

[lukeflowz]

Yeah it’s hard to be present anymore. I struggle with really bad anhedonia now. I had it a little bit before the drug and now it’s so much worse.

I never imagined that I would end my life. I never saw that for myself even when i was going through so much pain. But nothing I’ve ever gone through compares to this.

Before this invega experience, I can say confidently I never dealt with suicidal thoughts. During the whole process, when I was going through my monthly injections, it was a daily thought. This has subsided since getting off the injections, but I still don’t feel any different- I think it’s that I’m now hopeful of a chance in recovering. I was scheduled for 12 injections, though fortunately I was able to get my CTO revoked and cease the treatment.

Six is a large number of injections relative to what other people tend to get- if I were to get 12, I assume I would have been fried to a point of no return. Don’t get me wrong, I still feel fried now and can’t focus on anything, but 12 injections would have been too much for me I think.