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Coming off Invega/Xeplion (paliperidone) injections v11

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Had a dream about coaching/playing basketball with my collegiate friends. I’ve lost so much from this injection
 
lukeflowz said:
If I smoke weed, I’ll be thrown straight into psychosis. Unfortunately I’m sensitive to weed. I think the hard pill to swallow is that we’re going to have to wait a long time before any type of recovery. I’m hoping by month 4 I’ll be partially recovered making it easier to wait. As of now it’s difficult waiting while feeling the effects of invega.
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I haven’t smoked weed in a bit either. Been staying away from it for medical and social purposes; I don’t think it’s the healthiest lifestyle choice to indulge in, and after watching some TV shows where people are drug abusers(not a joke lmao) I started to revisit the way I view weed.

Granted, if you can feel high while on Invega it’s extremely likely you’ll recover. But I never lost my high after all those shots and I haven’t gotten another one since. I’m starting to feel marginally better I believe
 
Damn.. 28 years thrown in the wc like if i’m nothing, all my sacrifices, all my efforts, all my decision gone like that.. Like if these 28 years were not worth, like if my life is not worth, like I’m not worth.. Idk how to explain what i’am feeling rn but it’s like my past injections life was burned out of me and nobody cared, like I’m nothing, worthless, like if nobody even liked me or wanted me to be “good” healthy and happy..
 
I just needed a hug, someone who made me feel worth and that told me he/she cared about me, instead i got injected, i get a hug from risperdal consta injections..

Then watching all these people around me complaining for their perfect lifes just make me realize how much i had to suffer in my life even if was not necessary.

Like if in the “happiness” there is no place for me, never had place for me, some people take for garanted lots of thing and they get these things, instead i always lost every piece of happiness during my life and i never had access to things who are basically garanted for other people.
 
RisperdalConsta50mg said:
I just needed a hug, someone who made me feel worth and that told me he/she cared about me, instead i got injected, i get a hug from risperdal consta injections..

Then watching all these people around me complaining for their perfect lifes just make me realize how much i had to suffer in my life even if was not necessary.

Like if in the “happiness” there is no place for me, never had place for me, some people take for garanted lots of thing and they get these things, instead i always lost every piece of happiness during my life and i never had access to things who are basically garanted for other people.
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Yeah me too. There is no God.
 
We are beautiful people who have been wronged and there is absolutely no justice.

I’m sorry to everyone on this forum that this happened to you. I wish there was justice, but I know how the world works now.

It will chew you up and spit you out. There is no love or compassion for somebody like me.

Today I’m taking the first steps towards ending my life. I’ve failed at my attempt before but this time I won’t fail. I’m leaving my parents home this afternoon. Going to be staying with someone I met recently. From there I will be traveling somewhere else. Thinking of brokenself during these times. I hope he’s in a better place. I hope he gets a better life too when he is reincarnated. ❤️
 
rawbanana said:
Yeah me too. There is no God.
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I was so alone, i spent my whole life alone, like if I don’t matter and there is no place for me, then i got injected, now I’m still alone but with a damaged brain and a full cluster of sympthoms..

Like if nobody really care about me and nobody like me, they just can hate or ignore me, idk why.. Maybe i’am a bad person and i’am wrong and i deserve loniless and pain..

Idk, how can i just watch all these people having their perfect happy life, while i had only pain, loniless and problems..
 
rawbanana said:
We are beautiful people who have been wronged and there is absolutely no justice.

I’m sorry to everyone on this forum that this happened to you. I wish there was justice, but I know how the world works now.

It will chew you up and spit you out. There is no love or compassion for somebody like me.

Today I’m taking the first steps towards ending my life. I’ve failed at my attempt before but this time I won’t fail. I’m leaving my parents home this afternoon. Going to be staying with someone I met recently. From there I will be traveling somewhere else. Thinking of brokenself during these times. I hope he’s in a better place. I hope he gets a better life too when he is reincarnated. ❤️
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@Trueart2
 
We are losing this battle, we were already on our knees and instead of someone who helped us to get up They just smashed and hammer on our head.

What a fucking world we live in.. People who are already good keep getting more good and people who already are in a bad situation just keep getting bad things coming.
 
At least if i had someone to share my time with maybe i Will distract and maybe get support, but no one cares.

I’m just alone in this hell, forgotten and cursed.
 
I’m realizing it doesn’t even matter if I recover or not.

I can’t live with myself anymore. I have negative thoughts all day and I just can’t bear it anymore.
 
RisperdalConsta50mg said:
We are losing this battle, we were already on our knees and instead of someone who helped us to get up They just smashed and hammer on our head.

What a fucking world we live in.. People who are already good keep getting more good and people who already are in a bad situation just keep getting bad things coming.
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That’s the sad reality we live in!

I feel bad for the rest of you because this is not your fault. In my case, this is 100% my fault and I’ve gotten what I deserve. But for you guys it’s very sad. But I think you will recover. If you’re able to be patient you will recover.

I have other issues that won’t go away when I recover from this. So to avoid all the pain and misery I will be saying goodbye soon x
 
rawbanana said:
That’s the sad reality we live in!

I feel bad for the rest of you because this is not your fault. In my case, this is 100% my fault and I’ve gotten what I deserve. But for you guys it’s very sad. But I think you will recover. If you’re able to be patient you will recover.

I have other issues that won’t go away when I recover from this. So to avoid all the pain and misery I will be saying goodbye soon x
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For me is the same, even if i full recover (i doubt about that) then what? I resume to be a loner and a loser wich nobody want to share his time with?

I will just hit the gym again, train myself alone, get back home, smoke some weed while i play some BF6 shit or things like that, then i eat alone and i go sleep alone. Then I Will repeat again.

I realized that even if i recover only shit is there waiting for me, so what is the point of recovery?
 
RisperdalConsta50mg said:
For me is the same, even if i full recover (i doubt about that) then what? I resume to be a loner and a loser wich nobody want to share his time with?

I will just hit the gym again, train myself alone, get back home, smoke some weed while i play some BF6 shit or things like that, then i eat alone and i go sleep alone. Then I Will repeat again.

I realized that even if i recover only shit is there waiting for me, so what is the point of recovery?
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