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Dating vanilla while kinky — worth the effort?

inlilisimage

inlilisimage

Greenlighter
Joined
Dec 14, 2024
Messages
22
Location
California, USA
I've dated a few vanilla slaves in the past years, and the relationships ended when my kinks came up. I'm wondering if it's worth trying again or just sticking to people in the lifestyle.

Anyone here made it work across that divide?
 
It's all about the sex, right?

And a vanilla slave, is that someone who just pretends so they feel either kinky or part of a group?
How would you know beforehand if someone is for real?
Maybe start with a KGB style iterrogation date.
 
You can’t shock them out of the gate…..you must build trust and respect with each other. It’s all about the Princess ….vanilla and pamper her in an intimate private setting where she feels comfortable safe and in charge

You can gradually introduce kinky stuff that she might be hisitant about, but hey sweetie it’s just us, and nobody’s business or judging us/you. It’s very healthy and exciting……and really fun to explore new exciting semi taboo acts that you feel comfortable with darling.

You’re in control at all times honey…..you guide me……softer, slower, I like it better like that….oh, oh, that’s amazing keep doing that lol……a fully fresh shower so when she’s in downward facing dog, rubbing scented mango cream on her soft feet you can softly kiss and lick her ass cheek while sliding your fingers inside her juicy p@ssy

A soft warm tongue pressed gently inside her clean freshly showered ass whole (with millions of pleasurable nerve endings) will shock her brain with ecstasy and erotic exotic pleasures

Showed her a proper cream pie and let he see how hot she looks …….pull her hair and call her a slut, and make her give you slow sloppy blowjobs where you exploit in her mouth letting her let it oozing out of her mouth down your shaft ….even a hot facial were shenhas her tongue out, head filter back eyes closed and have her slowly suck hands free after

A safe comfortable environment where she feels safe and privacy without shame or judgement ……explore erotic fantasies……take low dose Psilocybin or even LSD half a tab, Cannabic etc

Very doable
 
It depends if they are adaptive to get into it themselves or not, like if they have an inkling of that compatibility in them.

My longest relationship was 8 years with a woman who I was not compatible with.

After it ended I thought for the longest time that there was something wrong with me.

Nope. Nothing's wrong with me. We were just into two different things.
 
I'm very prolific in the gay world, including excursions into working as a gay prostitute, BDSM and IV chemsex and fetish, but I am not even sure what kinky even is.
 
It depends on how kinky you mean by kinky. If you have any sexual interest that isn't common I've always believed you should at least hint at it as soon as possible if you want it to actually be part of your relationship. Better to strike out early than to lose a partner after a year or more because you have always wanted X and they don't like it. You can avoid embarrassment by starting with something relatively tame so you can judge the reaction.

I was lucky. My current partner is into it even though we didn't meet through any kind of "kink community". We had that conversation around our fourth date.

I always saw the whole "well you can gradually introduce your kinks and convince your partner to like it" attitude as sort of unethical. But dating is hard and obviously it has worked for some people. It's not always easy to find people who already like the things you like. Just be ready to accept that some things are just not right for some people.
 
Last edited:
inlilisimage said:
I've dated a few vanilla slaves in the past years, and the relationships ended when my kinks came up. I'm wondering if it's worth trying again or just sticking to people in the lifestyle.

Anyone here made it work across that divide?
Click to expand...

so funny, depends how much you care about the relationship verses the kink obviously
has anyone made it work yes compartmentalize things is it that difficult
 
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