Hi everyone, I’ve officially hit 10 months since my last Invega injection. I had a total of 10 injections, mostly 156 mg, with the last two being 117 mg. Do I feel recovered? Well, no, not even close.
Yes, I’m better than I was 10 months ago. I’m more awake now; I play video games, watch YouTube, and browse the internet. But these things bring me no joy or pleasure. I just do them to pass the time. Ten months ago, I was in bed 24/7, staring at walls, so this is definitely an improvement. However, the anhedonia is still kicking my ass.
I still can’t understand how
@Serhat, who had the same number of injections as me, managed to recover in 10 months while I haven’t. Maybe it’s because of the 2 or 3 Haldol 5 mg shots that were forced on me. That might be why my recovery is slower. Regardless, I haven’t lost hope. I’ll give it another year before concluding that I have long-term damage from these antipsychotics.
On the bright side,
@Mucky had more shots than both Serhat and me, and he magically recovered at the 24-month mark, exactly two years. If you’re on the road to recovery, I urge you not to take more antidepressants. They can cause more harm than good. I made the mistake of taking just one pill of Wellbutrin two weeks ago, and now I have full-blown tinnitus that hasn’t gone away. Many people say it’s permanent, so I’m praying it isn’t.
Sexually, I’m about 60% better than before. Honestly, I didn’t think I had PSSD from Invega, but I didn’t notice my libido was shot until I stopped watching NSFW content. At the time, I thought it was just the anhedonia, but now I can see I’m doing much better in that area.
My worst side effects are still anhedonia, lack of interest, cognitive problems, a blank mind, loss of inner monologue, weight gain, no motivation, trouble focusing, loss of spirituality, excessive sleep, no emotions, aphantasia, and being unable to feel the effects of coffee, nicotine, or weed. If the anhedonia would just go away, I’d be happy to wait years for the other side effects to improve.
My daily routine hasn’t changed much. I wake up, eat, use my PC for 10 hours, then go to sleep. That’s been my life for the last 18 months since I started the injections. Overall, I’d say I’m about 7 percent better than I was 10 months ago, which is barely anything.
Meanwhile, Serhat and
@CrimsonThornX were both at 80 percent recovery by this point, so I don’t know why my brain isn’t healing as quickly as theirs. It could be my brain injury from a car accident or the number of injections I had. Who knows.
My plan after I recover is to go back to school for a 1 year intensive graduate certificate and find part time work somewhere so I can finally start my life. No way I can continue to live like this for the next 5-10 years while everyone in my life is reaching milestones so I pray I recover quickly to finally begin my life and get off this damn website for good.
Obviously I will check in from time to time but it is really unhealthy how much time I spent reading previous versions and using this site in general. I will not let another suicide happen here so If my potential recovery story inspires even just 1 person, that will make me happy.
they told me i should be on life on it while im 9 months off smoking weed and eating shrooms with PARANOID SCHIZOPHRENIA diagnosis. I have cptsd and i had HUGE rage towards my mother. Like a volcano when i was around her due to the way i was raised and the way she was treating me when i was in bad mental state. So they saw me being isolated from toxic family because everyone took her side (covert abuse) , they saw rage outburst on my abusive father aswell and i couldnt work because of my cptsd so they all took it as schizophrenia and instead giving me body therapy like somatic experience or emdr THEY CHOOSE TO PERMANENTLY BRAIN DAMAGE PEOPLE. they dehumanise and traumatise. And about those people who are willingly on them not even schizophrenics but many bipolar ppl take it and supposedly love it. Life is funny
