JessFR
Bluelight Crew
Anybody who knows me knows I'm one of those people who's big on anniversaries. I think a lot about the past as it is, so in a way I suppose it's natural for me to mark them. Point is I tend to be someone who always knows it's someone's birthday, or the day someone died, or how.long it's been since something significant happened.
And tonight is something of a significant anniversary for me. It's 12 years since I joined bluelight!
Not 12 years on bluelight of course, I essentially left bluelight 3 years ago and have only posted a couple dozen times since then. But in a different way bluelight never entirely left my life. It's stayed with me in the amazing people I found through it.
I'd name them but there so many and I wouldn't wanna leave anyone out and I'm kinda high right now so I probably would.
That was always the thing I most enjoyed about this place, trying to help people and getting to know the interesting and amazing and fascinating people on it. I've long felt that people are the most important thing we live for. It honestly feels to me like every person is a miracle because they are all unique and around for so very brief a time. Which is why I cherish the great people I know and am saddened to think about how many other amazing people are out there that I will never met, who's paths will never cross with mine.
I know it's very easy to be cynical about people, people can be very difficult sometimes, they can be frustrating. I can sympathize with people who don't like people because there's no denying that as a people we are deeply flawed.
It's easy to not notice all the great things about people simply because it's just how it's always been. Every day people show selfless concern for others, every day people donate to charities or try and help friends family and strangers alike.
For nearly a year I was a homeless panhandler, it was one of the primary ways I supported my heroin habit at its worst. And while there's no denying that I saw some real uglyness. People who'd try and find reasons to get on my case, accuse me of faking being homeless. People who'd call the police on me. I had people throw things at me, I had guys offering money propositioning me (in a country with legal professional prostitution, so ask yourself why they'd seek out a girl begging on the street).
But, I could never have supported such an expensive habit if there weren't also so many good people in the world. People who wanted to help when they see someone so desperate. The problem is people often don't notice all the good in people, leaving only bad.
Even a lot of "bad" people don't believe they're bad, they have their reasons, they have their good sides, they're complicated. I think if you really look at the people around you, that you meet in real life away from the distorted reflection we get on the internet and media, you find that true evil, while it does exists, is acrually quite rare in people.
To me life is about the people we share it with, and bluelight brought many such people into my life that I'm happy to still have in my life years after I stopped being active here.
So, what am I saying? I'm saying look out for each other. Remember how short life is, the people who matter so much to you, and you to them. Saddly some of the people bluelight brought into my life have died, one will be having his death anniversary in a couple days. The universe is so big, so long, and we are so small and exist as barely a moment in time. Completely unique, one of a kind, and then seemingly gone forever.
Never take people for granted, don't take yourself for granted. We are all priceless. It might sound corny but I truly do believe that.
And tonight is something of a significant anniversary for me. It's 12 years since I joined bluelight!
Not 12 years on bluelight of course, I essentially left bluelight 3 years ago and have only posted a couple dozen times since then. But in a different way bluelight never entirely left my life. It's stayed with me in the amazing people I found through it.
I'd name them but there so many and I wouldn't wanna leave anyone out and I'm kinda high right now so I probably would.
That was always the thing I most enjoyed about this place, trying to help people and getting to know the interesting and amazing and fascinating people on it. I've long felt that people are the most important thing we live for. It honestly feels to me like every person is a miracle because they are all unique and around for so very brief a time. Which is why I cherish the great people I know and am saddened to think about how many other amazing people are out there that I will never met, who's paths will never cross with mine.
I know it's very easy to be cynical about people, people can be very difficult sometimes, they can be frustrating. I can sympathize with people who don't like people because there's no denying that as a people we are deeply flawed.
It's easy to not notice all the great things about people simply because it's just how it's always been. Every day people show selfless concern for others, every day people donate to charities or try and help friends family and strangers alike.
For nearly a year I was a homeless panhandler, it was one of the primary ways I supported my heroin habit at its worst. And while there's no denying that I saw some real uglyness. People who'd try and find reasons to get on my case, accuse me of faking being homeless. People who'd call the police on me. I had people throw things at me, I had guys offering money propositioning me (in a country with legal professional prostitution, so ask yourself why they'd seek out a girl begging on the street).
But, I could never have supported such an expensive habit if there weren't also so many good people in the world. People who wanted to help when they see someone so desperate. The problem is people often don't notice all the good in people, leaving only bad.
Even a lot of "bad" people don't believe they're bad, they have their reasons, they have their good sides, they're complicated. I think if you really look at the people around you, that you meet in real life away from the distorted reflection we get on the internet and media, you find that true evil, while it does exists, is acrually quite rare in people.
To me life is about the people we share it with, and bluelight brought many such people into my life that I'm happy to still have in my life years after I stopped being active here.
So, what am I saying? I'm saying look out for each other. Remember how short life is, the people who matter so much to you, and you to them. Saddly some of the people bluelight brought into my life have died, one will be having his death anniversary in a couple days. The universe is so big, so long, and we are so small and exist as barely a moment in time. Completely unique, one of a kind, and then seemingly gone forever.
Never take people for granted, don't take yourself for granted. We are all priceless. It might sound corny but I truly do believe that.
