So, I used to get really good fent. For like a year I did between a 1/3rd of a g and a 1/2 daily.
The last 2 weeks it's sucked. A few days ago I got 3gs of this brown stuff. Did over a g a day for 2 days, then yesterday I did a half g, and I was out by 6pm.
I woke up this morning at 7am. I fell back asleep, and had this crazy dream. I felt like it lasted a week, maybe longer. I wondered around for like a week, then switched bodies at least a couple times. It was like total time dilation. I hit my vape, ate breakfast, and felt pretty good, but I figured I'd be sick by noon. I called my dude to get a front. He said he'd front me 2gs but he was out. I was broke so I waited, and waited. Eventually I found some money, and bought a half g off someone else. Still haven't got my front.
But by then it was like 8pm, and I wasn't sick, so I got some Arby's and drove home. Now it's 12:10am, and I'm not sick. I don't really know what to do, or why I'm not sick. Is it possible the dope has been so crappy I've just successfully tapered off opiates? Did someone decide to make shitty fake heroin out of methadone and now I won't start withdrawing for another 2 days? Did I get clean in my 2 hour dream that felt like it lasted a week?
I want to go to sleep and see how I feel in the morning. I also want to do a line :/ but honestly, if I can just be "done", if this is it, and I wake up tomorrow feeling okay, maybe I should just be done? I have no idea what to think. Even a few months ago I would get terribly sick. I'd take loperamide and Tylenol but just uncontrollably crave and feel miserable. I literally remember thinking yesterday when I finished that half so soon in the day "I'm going to regret this tomorrow". I don't know a dealer who wakes up before noon. But it has just been a normal day. Literally my only drug free day since the Easter before last. It is so weird, I don't know what to think. I've went through hell trying to get clean, and have both failed and succeeded only to relapse. I've never just stopped and been cool. I hope I can fall asleep ok. I really want to see what happens if I don't use. My curiosity is overpowering my huge urge to get high. I haven't even opened the bag. I don't want to. I want to fall asleep.
The last 2 weeks it's sucked. A few days ago I got 3gs of this brown stuff. Did over a g a day for 2 days, then yesterday I did a half g, and I was out by 6pm.
I woke up this morning at 7am. I fell back asleep, and had this crazy dream. I felt like it lasted a week, maybe longer. I wondered around for like a week, then switched bodies at least a couple times. It was like total time dilation. I hit my vape, ate breakfast, and felt pretty good, but I figured I'd be sick by noon. I called my dude to get a front. He said he'd front me 2gs but he was out. I was broke so I waited, and waited. Eventually I found some money, and bought a half g off someone else. Still haven't got my front.
But by then it was like 8pm, and I wasn't sick, so I got some Arby's and drove home. Now it's 12:10am, and I'm not sick. I don't really know what to do, or why I'm not sick. Is it possible the dope has been so crappy I've just successfully tapered off opiates? Did someone decide to make shitty fake heroin out of methadone and now I won't start withdrawing for another 2 days? Did I get clean in my 2 hour dream that felt like it lasted a week?
I want to go to sleep and see how I feel in the morning. I also want to do a line :/ but honestly, if I can just be "done", if this is it, and I wake up tomorrow feeling okay, maybe I should just be done? I have no idea what to think. Even a few months ago I would get terribly sick. I'd take loperamide and Tylenol but just uncontrollably crave and feel miserable. I literally remember thinking yesterday when I finished that half so soon in the day "I'm going to regret this tomorrow". I don't know a dealer who wakes up before noon. But it has just been a normal day. Literally my only drug free day since the Easter before last. It is so weird, I don't know what to think. I've went through hell trying to get clean, and have both failed and succeeded only to relapse. I've never just stopped and been cool. I hope I can fall asleep ok. I really want to see what happens if I don't use. My curiosity is overpowering my huge urge to get high. I haven't even opened the bag. I don't want to. I want to fall asleep.