RCs PST

[anonymouse77]

I'm not currently dependant on opioids but just want to say the mental boredom and torture of being "sober" is getting to me. I plan to get some poppy seeds and make the tea again for some relief (hopefully). If it gets out of hand then I will get on opioid replacement therapy or something. I am unhappy from my family being mentally abusive and it's "hidden" and directed at me. Meaning others don't see it as they don't act like it around anyone else but only me. They play mind games and seem to delight in seeing me unhappy and distressed. I cannot escape it. I don't have the tools or ability to break away from them and make a life with normal nice people. I'm 46 and my mother is elderly but as bad as ever. She is early 80's. I feel scared and unsettled around her. Everything is a criticism or hidden insult and she just makes me feel like crap. Then there are two older brothers who are the same and very abusive. One I don't even talk to as he cannot relate to me without being very aggressive and intimidating. He was adopted and is the golden child and seems to take his anger out on me. Then there is the oldest fake brother who is 17 years older than me but we share the same mother and father. Unusual family with such a big age gap and it being only 3 of us. The oldest brother would ring me and be on the phone for hours and be very manipulative and controlling. I always felt unsettled with him and just felt fake "snake" vibes.

I also inherited a third of the money when our father died last year (parents divorced) and he is trying to shake me down for that also. He has pitched some ideas to get money out of me.

So poppy seed tea here I come. I have had enough. I am getting my will organised so it goes to animal charity. I will miss my tortie cat.

Thank you for reading.

 

[kiely]

The poppy tea will relax you more and it is soothing for anxiety. My thoughts exactly, in my opinion too.

And just try to ignore them as much as possible with their Unhealthy Behavior.

Poppy tea is very strong though and will enhance any excess opioids that you might be taking also.

And you don't get addicted to that tea !!! Although I am a tea connoisseur. Definitely. I understand.

Try to wear earplugs and try not to listen to them being creepy to you. Okay !!

 

[anonymouse77]

The poppy tea will relax you more and it is soothing for anxiety. My thoughts exactly, in my opinion too.

And just try to ignore them as much as possible with their Unhealthy Behavior.

Poppy tea is very strong though and will enhance any excess opioids that you might be taking also.

And you don't get addicted to that tea !!! Although I am a tea connoisseur. Definitely. I understand.

Try to wear earplugs and try not to listen to them being creepy to you. Okay !!

Thank you so much for understanding and your kind words. I will get back into the tea today. I need relaxing. Family all live locally but separate so I live alone and only contact them through phone or text though they are so controlling they probably wouldn't pick up if I called. They expect me to jump when they call. I have to be on *their* time.

Thank you again so much.

 

[anonymouse77]

There was no funeral for our father and I don't even know where the ashes are. I was kept out of the loop. While I got a third of the money the brothers got anything sentimental like photos, etc. I got my baby/kid photo album which has a couple of photos of our dad.

 

[kiely]

Kratom seems to be alright too. If you can find some that is good. Or a good strain. Red is a stronger effect.

. . . And it can be mixed into a warm tea.

Probably would be a lot less bother that brewing poppies also. But of course not a tasty !!

 

[anonymouse77]

Kratom seems to be alright too. If you can find some that is good. Or a good strain. Red is a stronger effect.

. . . And it can be mixed into a warm tea.

Probably would be a lot less bother that brewing poppies also. But of course not a tasty !!

Thank you for your reply and good suggestion. Unfortunately I cannot get kratom here in Australia as it's illegal and no seller I have contacted will ship here.

 

[kiely]

. . . . . Meaning others don't see it as they don't act like it around anyone else but only me. They play mind games and seem to delight in seeing me unhappy and distressed. So poppy seed tea here I come. I have had enough. I am getting my will organised so it goes to animal charity. I will miss my tortie cat.

Thank you for reading.

Just smoke some medical marijuana (a joint) or not.

And then be really super nice to them and act really happy around them when you have to interact . . . and really piss them off.

I am sorry that they are such idiots. And try to explain to them that they nag and are depressing to let them know they are not appreciated when they do that.

Other than that just act happy and act like they don't even bother you at all. See how long you can go with out contact with them and also see how fast that you can get out of

the situation when they do.

Lool. And smile when you do ?!!

Best Wish's to you Always.

 

[kiely]

Thank you for your reply and good suggestion. Unfortunately I cannot get kratom here in Australia as it's illegal and no seller I have contacted will ship here.

Grrrrr how AWFUL.

You would actually probably really love it.

Are you sure ? Can you research more to obtain just like poppy seeds !!!

I was wondering why you had not tried the Kratom. I forgot you had said that before about Aussie because I thought that Australia would be " different "

and not have such prohibition !!!! Very Sad . But it's really illegal ? How could that be !!!! Shame On Them !!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[kiely]

No Smoke Shops that would have it either ???

maybe at a tobacco shop you could find some in there.

like tobacco isn't any worse !!!!! o fa goodness sake.

 

[kiely]

thinking of you !!

 

[ageingpartyfiend]

@kiely I don't think there's access to medical weed in Australia, and like UK Kratom is illegal there

You guys think everywhere is like the states (I wish it was.....wait, no I don't...but I do wish we had legal cannabis it's fuckin' mental that it's ilegal here still wtf

 

[kiely]

^ Yah, sending Prayers . . . . down under.

 

[kiely]

@kiely I don't think there's access to medical weed in Australia, and like UK Kratom is illegal there

You guys think everywhere is like the states (I wish it was.....wait, no I don't...but I do wish we had legal cannabis it's fuckin' mental that it's ilegal here still wtf

Awe. That's just wrong. I always wonder how long weed and kratom will stay legal here.

UNREAL actually.

 

[ageingpartyfiend]

Awe. That's just wrong. I always wonder how long weed and kratom will stay legal here.

UNREAL actually.

Weed will be legal for evermore - there's no putting that genie back in the bottle, even if it's just for all the tax $$$

You bastards!

 

[anonymouse77]

Thank you so much kiely for the support and kind and loving messages. It means a lot. Weed is more legal here now and I do have medical cannabis (thc oil and flower). That is only recent that I have heard that was available. I feel it's not widely advertised and they are doing it on the down low. There are private clinics who you book with online and they phone you and have a nurse talk to you and then they prescribe it by a doctor. I might take some later today. The other thing I can get legally is kava powder and have a day on that for relief. I might grab some instead of poppy seeds.

ageingpartyfiend I did hear that the UK was similar to us here in oz and was having medical cannabis but that was just in a chat room and I am not there so cannot confirm. Maybe they have private clinics you could get some from legally if so? I could be wrong so sorry if I am. Good luck.

 

[ageingpartyfiend]

ageingpartyfiend I did hear that the UK was similar to us here in oz and was having medical cannabis but that was just in a chat room and I am not there so cannot confirm. Maybe they have private clinics you could get some from legally if so? I could be wrong so sorry if I am. Good luck.

you're right yeah, but it's incredibly rare, verry difficult to obtain and quite pricey

also, if you got stopped with it they'll still be searching your house even if you say it's prescribed and I can't have that! (have heard of that happenning just yesterday and the woman in question got busted for some other illegals she had, even though they 'let her off for having her legal weed - how very nice of them!)

also, I can't have 'cannabis' on any medical records for reasons I cba going into rn but they are super-valid believe me

luckily, very fortunately, I have an amazing loooong term source (someone who lives remotely and is basically a high quality cannabis scientist). I'm blessed with that I know. Great strains flower, also plenty very well made concentrates. I keep telling the guy that he is NOT allowed to die, lol. He assures me he will never 'retire' as he helps loads of sick people with his medicine, and that is music to my ears! He's a modern day saint imho.

EDIT please take care with the pst mrs, a rocky road to go down to treat anxiety for sure.

 

[anonymouse77]

you're right yeah, but it's incredibly rare, verry difficult to obtain and quite pricey

also, if you got stopped with it they'll still be searching your house even if you say it's prescribed and I can't have that! (have heard of that happenning just yesterday and the woman in question got busted for some other illegals she had, even though they 'let her off for having her legal weed - how very nice of them!)

also, I can't have 'cannabis' on any medical records for reasons I cba going into rn but they are super-valid believe me

luckily, very fortunately, I have an amazing loooong term source (someone who lives remotely and is basically a high quality cannabis scientist). I'm blessed with that I know. Great strains flower, also plenty very well made concentrates. I keep telling the guy that he is NOT allowed to die, lol. He assures me he will never 'retire' as he helps loads of sick people with his medicine, and that is music to my ears! He's a modern day saint imho.

EDIT please take care with the pst mrs, a rocky road to go down to treat anxiety for sure.

I understand what you are saying. Lucky you can still find cannabis though on the down low. Hopefully it becomes easier to obtain as the laws allow in time.

I ended up having about 50g of kava powder yesterday and I got to the bliss feeling for a bit but today I feel burnt out a bit. Everything wears off. I bought some st johns wart also when I was out for half price so will try that.

 

[kiely]

^^^ omg YOu must have to do a huge quantity.

But it's just a lot for me right now to have to work with the Kratom.

It sure did help me through a few headaches so far. But that's about it.

Everything has to be ordered now. Sorry.

Keep your head up. Some days can be better than others I guess.

 

[anonymouse77]

^^^ omg YOu must have to do a huge quantity.

But it's just a lot for me right now to have to work with the Kratom.

It sure did help me through a few headaches so far. But that's about it.

Everything has to be ordered now. Sorry.

Keep your head up. Some days can be better than others I guess.

Yes I always go overboard with things. Very all or nothing. I picked up poppy seeds at the supermarket today and put them back. I feel like kava must do something to your serotonin because last night I was having brain zaps similar (but not as severe) as when you come off SSRI's.

 

[kiely]

Yes I always go overboard with things. Very all or nothing. I picked up poppy seeds at the supermarket today and put them back. I feel like kava must do something to your serotonin because last night I was having brain zaps similar (but not as severe) as when you come off SSRI's.

Oh no. I hope that goes away. My brain zaps went away but they were from gabapentin. I can't take much unless it's clean. Yeh, I'm a snob. . but not really.

But I hope you get better. That's not good but it might stop like mine did. It was probably the heat adding to it also. It was extremely hot this Summer. It seemed like bad weather. That can't be healthy either.

I am sorry. I thought that smoke shops could sell Kratom. Everyone seems to go on line. I hope you find something. I want to grab some poppy seeds but the Kratom is working. Growing the poppies works the best too.