Mental Health Coming off Invega (Paliperidone, Xeplion) injections v. 7.0

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Hahaha nice joke. Abilify and Invega are both ADs, thats why you have anhedonia. So yeah, nice one
This sure has become a negative thread for something that the majority heal from eventually. Hoping your guys mindsets change soon and you get the help you need. Whether anti depressant or whatever it is to get you out of the clear depression you’re in.
 
So Abilify is basically the same thing and it’s what I got injected with. Im dealing with the same lack of emotions… the same anhedonia, and to top it off heart palpitations. Anyways. I have a hard time accepting God wanted this for me.. with that in mind I’d like to tell you guys a story if you don’t mind.


Something like 10 years ago I had a vivid dream I was in the back of a cop car in handcuffs… there were two police outside (1 male and 1 female) it was dark out and there was a sign in the lawn near my car.

The dream was too much like I was watching a movie to feel like a regular dream and so when I woke up I panicked and started praying. “God I don’t want to be arrested.” A voice inside me said “It’s going to happen, and it’s going to be for your own good.”

This was after some other things had happened to me, which had me convinced God was real 100%.

Anyways with that it mind I spent the next year trying not to get arrested because I was shook. I was working as the national quality manager for a big company and flying around the country doing audits. My direct boss was the COO (chief operating officer) of the company and the two of us got into a lot of mischief together. It wasn’t uncommon for just us two to run up a $600-800 bar tab on the company card, and when we were in Cali (where he lived) we would have parties after the local clubs closed with lots of blow and booze.

I had gotten my stomach pumped from drinking in Texas and by all accounts I was an alcoholic.


My grandma died and I went home for a week for the funeral. I ended up at a bar drinking pretty heavily. When I got to the bar my heat was working fine but by the time I left it suddenly didn’t work anymore. It was January in the Midwest and my windshield was completely frozen. I didn’t have an ice scraper so I did my best to carve a little hole in the frost so I could see.

It kept fogging over causing me to lean forward to wipe it and I eventually got pulled over by a cop right outside my apartment complex. It was around midnight. Long story short I refused to breathalyzer and I ended up in the backseat of the very same cop car, with the very same cops and the very same sign in the lawn as the dream. (It was the sign outside of my apartment).

I got 18 month’s probation with random alcohol testing. It ended up causing me to be fired from that job.

I stopped drinking and never touched blow again.

“It’s going to happen and it’s going to be for your own good.”

Sure was.

So based on that I know God knows every detail of our lives before they happen. I also know he plans events for specific reasons.

The only thing I can come up with is I was too arrogant and he wanted to humble me.

Mission accomplished. :/
Thanks for sharing! Maybe you’re psychic!
 
If you guys want I can share another story that originally proved to me God exists. It’s not related to Invega in any way so it’s up to you guys if you think it would be helpful or not.
 

Ok, so prior to this story some other things had happened to make me get into the idea of learning about religion and God. That in itself is a long story so I’m going to skip over it and go directly to this story.

This story took place a little over 10 years ago.. not sure the exact year.

Me and my then girlfriend Holly were at her moms house watching her dogs while she was away on a ski trip.

Holly went to target and while she was there she decided to buy us both bibles.

They were student Bibles published by a guy named Robert J Morgan. His website is www.RobertJMorgan.com. I know this because there was a foreword he wrote at the beginning of the Bible for students.

This wouldn’t have mattered if my name wasn’t Robert J Morgan.. but since it is.. it seemed very relevant!!!

Keep in mind Holly had no idea my name was in this book when she bought it.

So here I was reading this prologue when I stumbled across my full name in the print. Seemed to be a bit to exact to be a coincidence so I decided to offer up a prayer right then and there.

“God this seems to be proof you’re real but I want one more thing. Holly has to work tomorrow but I want her to be off.”

I didn’t tell her I offered that prayer… we were about an hour away from her job and she was supposed to open a Blockbuster the next day. (She was the assistant manager).


I wake up and she’s laying in bed next to me…


“Holly why aren’t you at work?”

“I was leaving the driveway and my car fish tailed on the ice. I hit the big rock in the neighbors lawn and it broke my axel. Nobody could give me a ride so they gave me the day off.”

I’ve never doubted Gods existence since
 
I'm glad to have at least recovered enough to the point where I can feel emotional again, and can become nearly fully immersed in music once more. Today I was looking for flute/piano covers of songs in video games I used to play back when I was like 8 years old, and I came across several in the process until I eventually came across one in particular that really stood out to me. As I was listening to it I realized how perfect, how beautiful the tone and melody is, it was starting to remind me of those simple times in life, over a decade before I was poisoned by antipsychotics, when I was so happy and cheerful. Shortly after I started crying my eyes out, more then I ever have to any other song I've listened to before. I just want myself back, I feel so desperate at this point, I'm glad that I'm seeing gradual improvements over time but that alone isn't sufficient for me, I want my true self back, exactly as it was before Invega. I'm in constant fear thinking of the worst case scenario, that I'll never live to fully enjoy my life ever again, that I'll never live to see that version of myself ever again, that almost every single thing I took for granted has been taken from me in an instant, and will never be the same for the rest of my life.
 
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Ok, so prior to this story some other things had happened to make me get into the idea of learning about religion and God. That in itself is a long story so I’m going to skip over it and go directly to this story.

This story took place a little over 10 years ago.. not sure the exact year.

Me and my then girlfriend Holly were at her moms house watching her dogs while she was away on a ski trip.

Holly went to target and while she was there she decided to buy us both bibles.

They were student Bibles published by a guy named Robert J Morgan. His website is www.RobertJMorgan.com. I know this because there was a foreword he wrote at the beginning of the Bible for students.

This wouldn’t have mattered if my name wasn’t Robert J Morgan.. but since it is.. it seemed very relevant!!!

Keep in mind Holly had no idea my name was in this book when she bought it.

So here I was reading this prologue when I stumbled across my full name in the print. Seemed to be a bit to exact to be a coincidence so I decided to offer up a prayer right then and there.

“God this seems to be proof you’re real but I want one more thing. Holly has to work tomorrow but I want her to be off.”

I didn’t tell her I offered that prayer… we were about an hour away from her job and she was supposed to open a Blockbuster the next day. (She was the assistant manager).


I wake up and she’s laying in bed next to me…


“Holly why aren’t you at work?”

“I was leaving the driveway and my car fish tailed on the ice. I hit the big rock in the neighbors lawn and it broke my axel. Nobody could give me a ride so they gave me the day off.”

I’ve never doubted Gods existence since
Lol so he let her off work but crashed her car?
 
Officialy 4 months off today. Improvements = I am more aware of my tremendous list of symptoms.
I can sleep at night.
Nothing else
 
I get 5/6
Just like me. Don't matter if I go to bed midnight or 2am, I ALWAYS stop sleeping 6am and cannot sleep again - then I lay in bed until 8:30am and wake up to go to job. My mind just wake up and my thoughts start running. It's like this to you? Tried Klonopin but this keeps happening.
Before APs used to sleep 8/9 easily.
 
Just seen my social worker and my personality is completely dead. I’m flat, emotionless and slow. I feel thick in the head. Anyone else experiencing this?
 
Just like me. Don't matter if I go to bed midnight or 2am, I ALWAYS stop sleeping 6am and cannot sleep again - then I lay in bed until 8:30am and wake up to go to job. My mind just wake up and my thoughts start running. It's like this to you? Tried Klonopin but this keeps happening.
Before APs used to sleep 8/9 easily.
Try sleeping at 4
 
5 month update! I lost 3lbs this month (lost 14 lbs in total). I have been noticing muscle definition more from going on several walks throughout the day as well as going on the treadmill (had to switch to that because of the heat for now),as well as the other various things I do like tai chi and yoga and stretching
I genuinely think my ptsd trauma from before is getting better , could be due to the EMDR I started,
I can laugh more and not feel so weighed down and I’m starting to wake up a little more refreshed
Still experiencing doubts and insecurities per the norm with this kind of process but I am slowly improving
These are all subtle changes and putting in effort each day to stay active for both a healthy brain and body has been helpful!
 
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