Welcome,Hello, My name is Eli, I'm a newbie here looking for advice. For a long time, I've craved to use more, new drugs. I'm 21 and have been into weed since a young teen (I managed to get a medical rec to do it legally here in Cali) and, since a late teen, have drank whenever I could get my hands on alcohol. And to get some, I wouldn't just lamely steal a drink from my parents, get a fake ID, or have someone buy for me. I've built a couple nearly risk-proof elaborate plans to get a bottle. Like the time my coworker friend and I at a grocery store job we had given our 2 weeks notice to, walked 2 bottles of wine right out the door in our bags at the end of our very last shift. It was just $10 cheap wine from one of the market's shipments. The store received weekly boxes of either 6 or 8 from this small local business, so we edited their handwritten invoice to say 6 instead of 8, put them into the smaller box the 6 ct normally came in, & took the extra 2. The store probably never noticed that they paid for 2 more than they had, or maybe they took it up with the brewery for "giving them the wrong amount". Either way, it was pretty easy bc we were the only staff in the back for that shift and there was no surveillance.
Anyway, back to my life/history with using, I've also at a few times done shrooms and DXM, but nothing more.
Now that I'm 21, drinking is a lot more often, but not so excessive (some day drinking, but a 750ml of liquor lasts me 7 days at least, usually more. And I love to combine weed and liquor.
Also being 21, I've realized clubbing may be a possible resource for meeting people who sell (I haven't tried seeking that sort of thing, only imagined it like what might happen in a movie). Basically, I have a fixation on this desire to use drugs that's hard to shake, and I may actually have some sort of biological pre-disposition for seeking escape/drugs. Got lots of alcohol and drug addled/recovered druggies in the extensive fam.
For the past month or so since I found out about them, I've been trying to shake the idea/desire to use poppy pods. The craving for them, despite never having tried them, is STRONG. I'm pretty contempt with my life right now because I have plans to move to a new city in August where my sister, who I'm very close with, lives. I've had a passion for cooking since I was a young kid, but any plans I made to pursue that, such as arrangements to go to culinary school or get a start in restaurants/bakeries, went to shit.
My oldest sister (I'm the youngest of 3), is very successful at age 24 off in NY after graduating from NYU, and in comparison to her success, my other sister and I have always felt sort of in-superior or lacking. Ive spent the last 3 years feeling rather unworthy or incapable of building a happy life for myself. Until recently when I decided I was finally gonna make a change and not allow myself to pause and feel crushed when I hit huge obstacles or barriers. I tried to make this move happen in 2020, but with the pandemic arising around then, my housing plans fell through. This time, I've gotten further and it looks like its actually happening. However, even after signing my housing contract, there's this big doubt or anxiety in me that, just like twice before, that the plan is gonna fall through at some point and I'm gonna be crushed back down where I belong.
I can't shake the thought that I can tap a button on my phone and have pods delivered (granted, I haven't checked this US site I found for legitimacy, so I may not have a source after all).
What I want to know/ask is, how possible would it be for me to dabble in poppy pod/seed tea in very small doses, and still function well in every day life including online college classwork? I've done a lot of research, and would plan to use a weak extraction method (not my espresso machine) to extract small starting doses of 3-5 grams pod shell carefully to avoid thebaine which, as I understand it, will make it more harmful to your system, and possibly more addictive. But I recognize that maybe I'm just holding onto this ideal sunshine, rainbows and kitty cats dream most new drug users have where they magically evade falling into a deep, mega-hooked, mess-up-your-life lifestyle.
Maybe instead, since it seems I already know the answer to that question, I could ask, Are there any "safer" drugs (maybe dissos or RCs?) I could get a hold of to satisfy my "cravings" for PST/PPT or something stronger and more dangerous? I don't think this craving will go away and I can't afford to seek help in counseling or NA type meetings which I wouldn't even belong in to begin with since I've like never done hard drugs/narcotics. If it comes out that I want to or actually do drugs, I won't be able to move to this new city and attend classes and things. Furthermore, my mom would be all over me, forcing me to stay where I am to focus on "recovery". Lol, recovery from what? I don't have a problem. Yet. That's what I'm here to avoid. And please don't tell me the only way to avoid addiction is to not do addicting shit, because that's not help. I'm gonna do some drugs at some point, be that now or later. I just want to make the smartest decisions with it. God I sound weak.
Anyway, now that you sort of understand my situation, please help if you can, in whatever way (besides the aforementioned un-helpful example). I apologize if half of that didn't make sense i'm stoned and tipsy as I write this. I accept your advice/comments/help, and its nice to meet y'all and to be here!........
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Cool image
Don't try cocaine in any route, it's overrated
Never use needles
Always use test Kits since there's alot of fake drugs and fentanyl going around ur state
Have fun safely
sweet, welcome again and enjoy the forum. You'll learn in here.
light.
