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Just need to vent

Prettyboy12

Prettyboy12

Bluelighter
Joined
Nov 9, 2020
Messages
380
Location
San Antonio Tx
Not sure where to post this. I’m just needing to vent to people who understand. All I’m seen now as from my family is a drug addict. I’m trying to hard to stay clean and I received my 4 month clean marble from NA. Because I take pain meds that’s do make me loopy sometimes, I get accused of using heroin again and nothing I say matters bc all addicts lie right? I had to move out of their house bc I got tired of my dad following me everywhere when he took me to appointments. It came to a head when he wouldn’t let me a private conversation with a friend who has never done drugs! We are on good terms but I was feeling like a prisoner. I’m couch surfing atm which sucks. Has anyone else dealt with their family acting like this? My dad made my mom literally strip search me for needle marks! Smh I’m so tired of being only seen as an addict.
 
My family hasn't gotten that extreme with me but the stigma always seems to be there. They don't trust me with things like large amounts of money anymore. Any time some pills go missing I'm always the first person they accuse of it. That type of shit never seems to end.

How old are you? I'm way past the days when I was living with them and they're still like this with me. The best advice I can give you is to not worry about it. Set boundaries with them and make them clear. Try not to do it in anger just calmly explain where the boundaries are. If they overstep them let them know immediately. A combination of that and really being clean will convince them in time if they can be convinced.

I'm going to give you some advice I wish I got a long time ago. Family is what you make it. At some point in your life you have to find someone you love and make your own. Once you do that you get to set the rules in the house. I'm not telling you to give up on your blood. You should make every effort to make that relationship work. But you shouldn't accept bullshit from them just because they're blood.

Some time away right now is probably for the best. Try to get a stable income going and your own place. That will make you feel better and shows responsibility. No one ever complained about an addict that paid the bills and didn't cause problems for his neighbors.
 
Are you taking Neurontin or Lyrica as a pain med atm? They kind of make you loopy on the higher scale of dosing. Try to reduce your dose as much as possible.
 
HeadphonesandLSD said:
My family hasn't gotten that extreme with me but the stigma always seems to be there. They don't trust me with things like large amounts of money anymore. Any time some pills go missing I'm always the first person they accuse of it. That type of shit never seems to end.

How old are you? I'm way past the days when I was living with them and they're still like this with me. The best advice I can give you is to not worry about it. Set boundaries with them and make them clear. Try not to do it in anger just calmly explain where the boundaries are. If they overstep them let them know immediately. A combination of that and really being clean will convince them in time if they can be convinced.

I'm going to give you some advice I wish I got a long time ago. Family is what you make it. At some point in your life you have to find someone you love and make your own. Once you do that you get to set the rules in the house. I'm not telling you to give up on your blood. You should make every effort to make that relationship work. But you shouldn't accept bullshit from them just because they're blood.

Some time away right now is probably for the best. Try to get a stable income going and your own place. That will make you feel better and shows responsibility. No one ever complained about an addict that paid the bills and didn't cause problems for his neighbors.
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I’ll be 44 in a few weeks.
 
Prettyboy12 said:
I take 10/325 hydrocodone and 8mg dilaudid for chronic pain
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Ok, i understand (but vertainly do ont agree) why is this. In certain NA cricles any opioid use for any reason excludes you from the program. It's a bit different everywhere but generally they are hostile towards people with diagnosed reason to use opioids trying to join in their community.

In my country they're suspicious even towards people with meds like lyrica and neurontin. Benzos and opioids are a big no no and you will not be accepted no matter what's the reason behind your prescription. They went even as far as banning people on opioid maintenance from the meetings. It's finally changing at a really slow pace. Nowadays if you're on suboxone generally all the groups accept you. Methadone is still a bit iffy and certainly most meetings so not like the methadone folks taking part. They might let them take part though silently disagreeing with it, And these people can sense they aren't welcomed so watch the poin in coming.

Of course there are a lot of sensible and smaert people in them who are a bit more broad with they're views. But I've also heard some downright idiotic advice among the particioants. Like telling others that one's goal should always be free from all of the substances that affect the central nervous system, like SSRIs, antipsychotics and such. Benzos i still manage to understand. Most people think they need them ehile they do not. Some occasional cases exist though. But a vast amount of people need their APs to live a normal independent life out of an instititution. The medical advice given by ignorant people quite often causes more grief than anything good.

Sorry for the offtopic rant.
 
LivingOnValium said:
Ok, i understand (but vertainly do ont agree) why is this. In certain NA cricles any opioid use for any reason excludes you from the program. It's a bit different everywhere but generally they are hostile towards people with diagnosed reason to use opioids trying to join in their community.

In my country they're suspicious even towards people with meds like lyrica and neurontin. Benzos and opioids are a big no no and you will not be accepted no matter what's the reason behind your prescription. They went even as far as banning people on opioid maintenance from the meetings. It's finally changing at a really slow pace. Nowadays if you're on suboxone generally all the groups accept you. Methadone is still a bit iffy and certainly most meetings so not like the methadone folks taking part. They might let them take part though silently disagreeing with it, And these people can sense they aren't welcomed so watch the poin in coming.

Of course there are a lot of sensible and smaert people in them who are a bit more broad with they're views. But I've also heard some downright idiotic advice among the particioants. Like telling others that one's goal should always be free from all of the substances that affect the central nervous system, like SSRIs, antipsychotics and such. Benzos i still manage to understand. Most people think they need them ehile they do not. Some occasional cases exist though. But a vast amount of people need their APs to live a normal independent life out of an instititution. The medical advice given by ignorant people quite often causes more grief than anything good.

Sorry for the offtopic rant.
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My NA group doesn’t know but my sponsor does. In our group even if you’re still using you’re welcome if you’re wanting to try n get clean and try our way of life.
 
Prettyboy12 said:
Not sure where to post this. I’m just needing to vent to people who understand. All I’m seen now as from my family is a drug addict. I’m trying to hard to stay clean and I received my 4 month clean marble from NA. Because I take pain meds that’s do make me loopy sometimes, I get accused of using heroin again and nothing I say matters bc all addicts lie right? I had to move out of their house bc I got tired of my dad following me everywhere when he took me to appointments. It came to a head when he wouldn’t let me a private conversation with a friend who has never done drugs! We are on good terms but I was feeling like a prisoner. I’m couch surfing atm which sucks. Has anyone else dealt with their family acting like this? My dad made my mom literally strip search me for needle marks! Smh I’m so tired of being only seen as an addict.
Click to expand...
Drug addiction could led you to dark,bad places.Normal for your parents to fear about you.Be honest to them and to you.I am a parent too.Dont judge them too severe,cause i believe they love you and wish all the best for you.Try to maintaine relationships with them based on trust and love.You know...trust is something that easely could destroy and hardly repair.Wish you luck and may the God helps you.
 
Nas47 said:
Drug addiction could led you to dark,bad places.Normal for your parents to fear about you.Be honest to them and to you.I am a parent too.Dont judge them too severe,cause i believe they love you and wish all the best for you.Try to maintaine relationships with them based on trust and love.You know...trust is something that easely could destroy and hardly repair.Wish you luck and may the God helps you.
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On the other hand, overbearing parents can often be the cause of their children's problems...
 
I can see this from both sides in a way, like yes I do totally understand - most of my family don't see me any other way even when I am clean, but if I think about it properly I haven't really given them any reason to trust me. I've lied to them far too many times while in the depths of addiction. They have seen me at my worst too many times so why would they treat me any other way when I predictably keep going through this cycle, y'know? I haven't lived with them since my teens and that was a good move and might be the best thing you can do. You going to be able to find somewhere of your own soon?
 
Prettyboy12 said:
Aside from slamming dilaudid or morphine pills I’m doing good. Still clean off meth and heroin! I’ll be 6 months clean on the 21st!
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Well that is good about the meth and heroin, keep that up!! Any thoughts or desires to get off the pills?
 
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