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Recovery ⫸⫸ THE RECOVERY THREAD 2021 ⫷⫷

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I wish I could offer some support or anything but I don't have a clue in relation to anything like that. I just hope you can win the battle. I take it you got on to the other forum?
I had a rough day yesterday physically and mentally but today physically I'm fine and craving not as intense, fingers crossed it stays that way.
Gonna get some jigsaws today or some canvases to paint for later.
I'll get back around to my old hobbies but feel like something totally different just now helps as my brain doesn't automatically associate what I'm doing with a drink.
Dunno if you've seen it but I've turned in to Super Hans from Peep Show...more juice! Lol
 
i didn't get onto the other forum.... super annoying. no reply from admins. no idea why so just gonna leave it and if i get nothing after the weekend email again.

so glad you're doing better today!! these things go in peaks and troughs so don't get despondent if you feel worse later or tomorrow. just have faith it will even out.

great idea to get some things to do. we had massive jigsaws in rehab cos tv and phone/computer time was limited. painting would be ace!! i am not remotely artistic but i tried to draw every day in rehab- though i just drew the same thing over and over, copying from a picture lol.

if everything you do you associate with drink then definitely you need to find something different. i still haven't really worked out who i am without drugs.... i just like the same things i did as a teenager before i got into them. luckily all those things are super cool, like punk rock and cats.

i loved peep show but i didn't watch the later series!! watched some recently just cos we were stuck for stuff to watch. its so fucking painful but funny. super hans is hilarious. its one of the shows me and my boyf quote at each other. though i usually don't get it when he does cos memory is so fucked by substances.
 
Thanks it was good to have some relief yesterday. Ended up patching the painting and jigsaws but still gonna do that lol. I've been up all night though lol think I drank too much coffee haven't been drinking it for ages because thought something was up with my heart but really love an iced coffee.
I've been up all night cause the coffee, was fucking around on a music recording app. started the foundations for an electronic number. That's cool I like punk too. 🙂

Been up stressing about stuff just want things to get better for everyone and feeling an immense amount of pressure. My ex's mum phoned me last night too to tell me my ex was suicidal and had disappeared again. Someone managed to get him but he fucked off again apparently. I still obviously have a heart and care about him so worried sick plus I don't think I could handle anything else. It's hard enough staying sober for a day.
That's me had my moan for the day I think lol.

Yeah Peep show is one of my favourite shows ever lol. I feel like I'm the female Jeremy sometimes haha. Johnsons hilarious too.
Got the same memory problem lol.
Take care everyone gonna attempt sleep
 
shit!! urgh that's hard @iTry91 what a nightmare really hope he's found safe and sound soon. not what you need at all. i hope you made it through the day OK. you really, really need to put youself first right now. even if that means behaving in a way you feel is heartless or snide.

ha i might be a female jeremy sometimes, but i think i probably come across more as mark lol. i am easygoing about most things, but the ones i'm not about i can be a nightmare.

had a pretty nice day. did some hiking with my parents and boyf, was fairly easy going but still good prep for my holidays.
 
Thanks @hylite
you have too! ✌️

Lmao at female mark I wind my brother up and he winds me up that I'm Jeremy n he's mark/Johnson 🤣! Ooh hiking... Nice. Was the scenery nice?

All is well and thanks for the concern 🙂 He is safe and I'm still sober!...just! Lol! He got his phone and all that stole because he was so drunk and he has a swollen face.... the police took him to his mum's bit early hours of the morning.
Went to my first two recovery groups today and really benefited from them.
 
They actually didn't which was funnily enough the only thing I felt was a negative for me. Social distancing though, there was 10 max each session but windows were open too in both. I dunno, weighing it up I'll probably just go I've had my two vaccines and I've hardly been seeing anyone lately lol. I will need to be extra careful when meeting my parents though.
 
I Don't know if this is a good place for this but a few months ago I messed up and started back on an old flame....opioids. I started IVing pills again and stayed on them for about 2 months hard. Last month I decided to end this thing before it sent me back to the heroin scene and started working hard to cut down......I've drastically dropped my tolerance to where one morphine holds me 24 hours.....now is the time.

I have an unusual idea for withdrawal that has worked in the past that I absolutely do not recommend to anyone. I am kindof a maniac. Since laying around doing nothing for days is not an option due to my job I grabbed some ice....gabapentins..... and weed. So far so good. Day one is over and I'm perfectly okay, haven't even used the kratom I have and will avoid it unless things get really rough.

I know I have to stop with the opioids... they hold me back. They make me content to just be average and to keep chugging on. They cause problems when I run out. I hate to see the look on my family's face when they know I'm taking them.
I know everyone is going to say don't swap addictions..... no worries, I'm of the mind you'd have to be a total lunatic to want to do uppers daily. It is the only non opioid thing that I know of that can totally overpower withdrawal for several days. Worst case scenario I fail and have to try a different tactic. I guess I'm just tired of being sick and tired... been at this for damn near 20 years. It's only in the last year or 2 that I've even attempted or gave a shit to do better with my life.
 
well done for getting it back under control @SteeleyJ -but the cocktail you're doing to keep off the opiates isn't helping you long term. you would have to be a total lunatic to want to do uppers daily, but they get you eventually and the desire becomes overwhelming. it happened to me and did not end well.

i'm doing okish. tired.
 
Thanks for encouragement. And no worries... my current regimine of things is short term only. Deffinitely not good method for others to try, its hard on the body and lots of people just get addicted to it.. Hell half my friends use it damn near daily.😑 Im just using enough to push through 4 or 5 days and the lethargy and give me something else to focus my inner junkie on. Personally I only find amps fun for the first 24 hours but it's so powerful that it will override withdrawal as long as it isn't too bad. Day 2 today..... got a few hours sleep and some food last night. It's going to haveto be good enough.
I have aches....sneezes and chills but that's about it. I got this. 😎🤠 Long term and PAWS is a different story but I will burn that bridge when I get there and am out of the acute phase.
 
@ chinup... Best of luck with the stims. Did you ever manage to come off them?
I've watched people I care about for years deal with that and go in and out of prison.
 
Thanks for the encouragement folks
MY birthday came and went and despite the lack of changes to my diet and exercise (mind work has been picking up so that keeps me pretty active) .. anyways, Im working on day 4 but Im definitely not "sober" - weed helps lol. Confident I can get to a week no problem. As Im too wiped from yesterday to even want to drink. Work tomorrow then supposed to leave on friday to go visit friends for the weekend. They dont drink so it shouldnt be too bad .. we'll just get stoned all week. Facking potheadsbeyond that one instance at a time lol

Edit: I cba to scroll up but someone may have asked whatstarted this most recently lapse. This one started June last year after Covid hit, I was bored and off work playing tonnes of video games. I started exercising, doing mindfulness and was doing well. I had a minro health scare relating to exercising and I just spiraled fast. Even started smoking cigs for the first time in 5 years. Perhaps it was the realization that Im getting old? Idk

From there ive been off and on booze. Drop cigs in January in favour of vaping. Down to 3 mg now but I wanna stop, soon. PErhaps after some time off drinking.

Anyways just came to Im doing ok and I hope everyone else is too
 
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Great to see you all doing much better. My past year issues are almost gone now. I can sleep well and enjoy myself on the weekends. Have started taking yoga classes and meditation at home to increase focus and memory, which I lagged the previous year and the year before. Cheers!
 
So it's now Saturday. Still no opioids except kratom one time. I just want to add to this thread if you read my first post that this is a potentially dangerous idea and I would advise not to do it. Very hard on body. I slept 4 to 6 hours since Monday mornjng... 3 of them last night. I also think I came very close to serious medical problems. Had chest pain.... short breath . . Dizzy. . And spots in vision last night on top of the madness and anxiety from it. After sleep food water gabapentin baclofen and aspirin...... I still have the chest pain 8 hours later. Will see.

Positive.... no opioids still, feel kinda okay today. Mild symptoms that come in waves and GI problems. This better get me off them, I looked into the abyss on this one I think...
 
you're fucking killing it @deficiT!!!

i have been OK with not drinking. not completely abstinent but its not ruling my life anymore. really concerning is i've just shifted my focus to my weght. and not even lost weight despite restricting and its driving me mad. went for a hike today so hopefully that will have helped.
 
Has anyone during opiate withdrawal have this thing happen to their mouth and throat its feels like a layer of skin come of and everything is agony to eat any spice lime even a poacket of prawn cocktail crisps is agony. Been through many opiate wd but never had this problem
 
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