What is wrong with the MDMA available today? - v2

[AutoTripper]

It’s ok man. We know what you mean and fully appreciate your fluid communication style.

Thanks. I appreciate you here. Not a word or sentiment above was addressed or insinuated towards any single member here, or planetary being, other than the man I replied to. And with no intended malice either sincerely. Call it heartfull communication. I love that term!

I am very prone to being riled currently. 3 Neurological viral infections currently have damaged my nerves physically, specifically the nerve endings.

I’ve been saying to my mum quite frequently, in figure of speech style- “My nerves are frayed.”

They literally are, by true definition.

Just finished my oil pulling, steam inhalation with essential oils now, shower, chiropractor, home, bed, hopefully at some point today- some comfort.

I literally endured I believe possibly the most torturous night (as in attempted restful sleep) ever physically, permanently conscious of everything and the situation I will wake to face. The worst nightmares of my life constantly under attack from demonic entities and manifestations, waking twice an hour bursting for a wee and poo, mucus permanently running out of my lungs onto my pillow, a hundred odd different symptoms/sensations/pains to elevate my consciousness above.

Add a true panic condition and anxiety disorder. Hence the torture and my emotional instability in this moment.

Really I should have left reading the reply until later, and not responded until more in my right mind.

But it would have just festered in my already torturously anxious mind. So I figured just get it out of the way.

I will keep up the fight but only if I can see a way to feel okay enough just to bear physical life and consciousness. It’s time to get real. If there is a way I’m determined to find it.

If there isn’t I don’t see me enduring much more time.

I’m really not trying to be at all dramatic, simply real. I have honestly never been less able to see forwards in life, than this morning after that night, that week, month, year, life.

To this point. If not for the love and care for my mum, I would simply starve myself in total peace, fully letting go. If I was alone in the world. It’s only this reason I keep fighting.

Can’t just check out any old time, well you can, but I’ve not given up so far.

 

[Jabberwocky]

Thanks. I appreciate you here. Not a word or sentiment above was addressed or insinuated at any single member here, or planetary being, other than the man I replied to.

I am very prone to being riled currently. 3 Neurological viral infections currently have damaged my nerves physically, specifically the nerve endings.

I’ve been saying to my mum quite frequently, in figure of speech style- “My nerves are frayed.”

They literally are, by true definition.

Just finished my oil pulling, steam inhalation with essential oils now, shower, chiropractor, home, bed, hopefully at some point today- some comfort.

I literally endured I believe possibly the most torturous night (as in attempted restful sleep) ever physically, permanently conscious of everything and the situation I will wake to face.

Really I should have left reading the reply until later, and not responded until more on my right mind.

But it would have just festered in my already torturously anxious mind. So I figured just get it out of the way.

I will keep up the fight but only if I can see a way to feel okay enough just to bear physical life and consciousness. It’s time to get real. If there is a way I’m determined to find it.

If there isn’t I don’t see me enduring much more time.

I’m really not trying to be at all dramatic, simply real. I have honestly never been less able to see forwards in life, than this morning after that night, that week, month, year, life.

To this point. If not for the love and care for my mum, I would simply starve myself in total peace, fully letting go. If I was alone in the world. It’s only this reason I keep fighting.

Can’t just check out any old time, well you can, but I’ve not given up so far.

Man. I’m really sorry to hear how you are feeling and what you are going through. If you are feeling fragile you need to be a little careful where you post in Bluelight. Maybe come over to The Dark Side where you’ll find more sympathetic ears to talk it through with?

 

[unodelacosa]

You are very very very very nasty, I had already seen clearly, but this repost has utterly shocked me.

No, I'm really not. I'm just 100% committed to the truth. I'm sorry you see it that way, but the Internet is a great equalizer. On here, it doesn't matter who you are in real life. You have no idea who I am nor what I've been through either. For all you know I'm dying of Parkinson's, my promising career cut short by a stupid fucking hand tremor. Regardless, I'm not playing that sympathy card. Maybe I made it all up; maybe you did. And maybe you did not. I don't know, but you shouldn't rely on that little trick to win arguments.

I’m entirely debilitated by severe physical illness due to Lyme Disease as I told you before.

No, you never told me this. And also this has zero bearing on our discussion as we veer further off-topic into the ridiculous nonsense notion of ESP. Moreover, I'm required to believe you here, and while I'm inclined to do so, I would be naive not to consider alternatives and malingering and/or exaggerating.

You seem to be possessed by evil.

Lol. I can't tell if you're being serious right now.

if you had some real IQ you could have deduced no way can I be a child if I took ecstasy between 1996, age 16, to 2005.

This assumes I believe you, recall. People lie all the time. I'm curious what the circumstances are leading to your current state with Lyme disease. but pls do not share this on this thread.

ESP is totally real.

Ok, can you at least admit that the majority of scientists reject it as fake and unverifiable? You can't just ignore facts when it suits you to do so.

You just are not gifted enough to access it, or intelligent enough to comprehend.

Yes, and the emperor's new clothes are invisible to those who are stupid or incompetent, right? Don't fall for that line. You're smarter than that.

trying to eat, sleep and survive is simply torture atm.

I either give up now at long last, or I find a miracle Avenue to continue living.

Ok let's just say this is true. Firstly, if this is indeed factual, then know that you have my deepest sympathy, and I mean that from the bottom of my heart, no matter how evil you think I am. That's a rough hand for a person to be dealt, and I hope you find peace and comfort somehow.

But if you're putting on a front for sympathy, then that's not cool. And either way, you're playing this card to try to shame me and somehow win your point. That's certainly shitty. And to be fair, before I responded, I took some time to look into ESP and the paranormal again, and I really asked myself if perhaps I was being close-minded. But my resolute answer, after reflection, is that no, while I want ESP to be real – that would be cool. as. fuck.– it's just a fantasy to think it really exists. ESP is just fake-ass nonsense; it always has been and always will be. And I'm sorry if that hurts your feelings or your sensitivities or whatever, but I have to stick with my dedication to revealing the truth. I'm not going to capitulate because you played the medical trauma card. We all have trauma stories, you know. Yours is not a Get Out Of Debate Jail Free card.

I’m quite astonished truly that a) you dispute and question, highlight that simple correctly worded, conjugated brief phrase, and b) attack (again) me directly over it.

Relax, killer. I was attempting to inject some levity into the rebuttal. It was not an attack, but merely an observation that you had worded that sentence in the manner that Yoda orders the words in his sentences throughout the Star Wars movies. You know what I'm talking about, too, so quit playing victim like I'm just beating up on you for proposing bad ideas and rubbish pseudoscience.

To this point. If not for the love and care for my mum, I would simply starve myself in total peace, fully letting go. If I was alone in the world. It’s only this reason I keep fighting.

Can’t just check out any old time, well you can, but I’ve not given up so far.

Yeah well, if what you've said is true, and I'll grant you the benefit of the doubt that it is, then yeah, I hear you. Life is pain, but through pain comes all good art. Idk if you ever tap into a creative side, but for me, it's a massive form of therapy I highly recommend. I hope you feel better soon.

 

[AutoTripper]

But if you're putting on a front for sympathy, then that's not cool. And either way, you're playing this card to try to shame me and somehow win your point.

Just on this, I honestly was not intentionally doing either of those things.

I did not seek sympathy.

Empathy, compassion, I appreciate of course.

Support, I need.

So no front for sympathy as a card play, without any attempt either to “win” my argument.

I speak, always purely from the heart, with no agenda or anything intentionally underhand.

I care for all people. Okay, I am sorry to have been so accusatory, judgemental and impolite to you.

But I honestly had reached a point of endurance in life today where I could see no way forward more than ever before.

I was fending off true extreme panic attack all night. I can’t afford to go into panic attack right now.

Okay fair point. It’s not your duty to keep accurate record of everything members share here.

I, though, am NO liar, nor fabricator, in any way. I speak dead, total truth regarding my life and experiences, like my history of MDMA use.

I just hoped you would have assimilated that without just discounting it to be able to safely assume I am not some infant.

Okay sorry I took you serious on the Yoda thing. Again, I don’t want sympathy! I’m NOT playing a woe is me card.

My life is phenomenally intense and difficult, for 16 years now. It’s a miracle Ilive this far.

Today I have been in the darkest place ever. You can rightly call it true emotional trauma.

I think I did explain though to you how I’m effectively housebound mostly, debilitated by chronic fatigue from long term Lyme, since 2005, when I was forced to cease taking MDMA, after 3000 pills plus maybe 50 grams MDMA from 1996.

You have no REASON to simply dismiss that as lies. It is absolutely not.

I do thank you for your well wishes. Please understand I’m in the most highly distressed emotional state in life currently. Again, no sympathy. I’m not asking you to hold back, like- I’m sensitive please be gentle, sort of thing at all. It isn’t like that. I just spoke truth from my heart.

Now, we will never agree on the ESP. I don’t care what so called scientific experts claim to have determined. I have experienced it powerfully. I did suffer an assault on my neurochemisty that time, many others too.

But my memories of the entire 3night Exodus Festival in Brogborough UK, 2000, I can tell you exactly to the tee exactly what drugs I took from the go, the price, who I was with, the names of presses, it’s all crystal clear.

MDMA neurotoxicity injury, does not automatically invalidate, or create fals or inaccurate, imaginary memories.

I do wish you and all the best truly. I will get upset at times, if I’m called a troll one day, a child another. If I wasn’t being fully transparent and deadly honest then I should have far less discourse to feel any emotional agrievement.

 

[psy997]

This is not the right place for this discussion, @AutoTripper and @unodelacosa

Furthermore, insulting other users and calling them retarded is also not welcome.

 

[AutoTripper]

This is not the right place for this discussion, @AutoTripper and @unodelacosa

Furthermore, insulting other users and calling them retarded is also not welcome.

I don’t dispute that. I am sorry about the derail. We began on topic, stretched into the ESP thing, and we effectively made peace I feel which did please me.

“That” discussion would have been more appropriate than “this” as it has drawn its conclusion here. Past vs present/ongoing.

Of course calling another member, person full stop a retard is unacceptable.

Passions have run high, I did let myself down under the heat of emotion, for which I did apologise. We can all say things we later realise we didn’t mean, don’t stand by. I appreciate the other member and I doubt we shall ever disagree in an unharmonious manner again.

So our discourse was not purposeless, in that sense. And IMO the importance of human relations here is underestimated. I agree indeed, not the place here, but it just went down naturally and ran it’s course but I promise not to repeat that in this thread where so much groundbreaking jaw dropping scientific revelation is on display and not to be missed!

Now, if we had not been mature enough adults to diffuse our little fiery debate, make peace, and if things really had gone over the line on the insult, abuse scale, then actual moderators would have surely stepped in.

Fortunately it was not required. No further action or comment, was really actually required on this, here, IMO....


If any posts are simply overly off topic distracting with no merit, I am very happy for any moderators to remove them.

Us, the non moderators, aren’t the ones with the sheriff’s badge around here.

 

[indigoaura]

I have skimmed the last several pages and have possibly missed some details, but there was also quite a bit of off topic talk.

I have not posted much because I have not had a lot to add.

IEC has been busy with some malfunctioning equipment. I have other samples to send them, but they said to wait. I have also mentioned this before, but the language barrier is frustrating. I will ask direct questions and get no reply. I don't think it is deliberate, but I think the translator they use may not be interpreting correctly, or their English is not entirely accurate. Not sure. I just wish I had a lab that I could pay to get the types of tests I want and the level of detail I want.

The latest email implied that I may be able to access some additional levels of testing through a researcher they are collaborating with. Sounds promising, but again, it is hard to understand the emails.

Here are some other random details that may be relevant to our conversation.

I did some more MDMA. Again, tried the 15 mg of 2CB first. However, I got the timing wrong. I had eaten and the 2CB never hit (as is often the case with 2CB and food). After about 3 hours, I got impatient and decided to move forward with the MDMA. Same batch as last time. However, due to getting the timing wrong, the MDMA and 2CB hit at the same time. Remember how I said that taking the MehDMA first was bad? Well, same thing here. When the MDMA hits first or when they are concurrent, it turns into this awful experience with a migraine headache, anxiety, feelings of being overwhelmed etc. Just terrible.

So, 2CB first = better MehDMA.
MehDMA first = migraine/anxiety/horrible comeup

Once the 2CB ran its course, things leveled out into a normal Meh experience, but I thought it was interesting that the timing on the 2CB makes such a tremendous difference.

I will also add this, as it relates to my personal health and one of the side effects I have complained about for a long time. Everyone here has read me complain about getting sick afterwards with nausea and indigestion, dizziness etc.

Well, recently, I cut out sugar due to having some borderline glucose levels on blood testing. Added DHEA to my supplements. Also, been more active and walking about 2-5 miles every day. Blood tests showed fasting blood sugar down to 70.

Why is this relevant? Well, there was no more sickness in the days following MDMA usage. Honestly not sure what to make of that. Same batch, same dose, same activities...but no dizziness, indigestion or other issues. Open to theories and suggestions here. The glucose level is what seems the most likely reason to me, but who knows. I will see if this pattern holds true next time.

@AutoTripper, sorry to hear you are not doing well at present. Having watched my partner deal with similar issues, I know it is a very difficult road to walk. You know I have always appreciated your Kerouac style stream of consciousness prose! Hope things look up soon. Things CAN eventually get better!

@Negi The highest dose I have taken of meh is a 200 mg starting dose with two 100 mg re-doses.

 

[AutoTripper]

@AutoTripper, sorry to hear you are not doing well at present. Having watched my partner deal with similar issues, I know it is a very difficult road to walk. You know I have always appreciated your Kerouac style stream of consciousness prose! Hope things look up soon. Things CAN eventually get better!

Thanks Indigo, I sure appreciate you as being conscious which I’ve realised is an even greater rarity than I recognised.

I’m sorry for derailing you folks thread, ironically it was the marvel and curiosity of this debate and phenomenon which caught my interest and led me here.

I’m heavily focussed on healing currently. Lots positive little projects, therapies, approaches in line and in progress, I just need time, energy, commitment and fortune.

But in there lies hope, which is like, just below needing a miracle? Lol.

Hope you are holding well yourself Indigo. And wishing the best for your partner too.

 

[Deleted member 521610]

ima do some magic mdma in a few weeks from a old stash. It worked well for my friends. See the old stuff works fucking well idk about any mdma made since covid started though that shit is trash

 

[AutoTripper]

Things CAN eventually get better!

This is so true and so poignant. It’s a good angle to ponder from. Not “better” but “change”.

Things CAN change. They will change. It’s a fact. We can’t stop it.

I have used this angle recently to restore some hope for the future deep inside myself.
We become overly ingrained in our predictive belief systems. Things absolutely can, and will change, for better or worse.

 

[AutoTripper]

Open to theories and suggestions here.

Refined, white sugar literally whiplashes the adrenal glands out of shape.

It remains, universally, unduly unrecognised as a genuine drug, white sugar, with powerful disruptive, chemically, hormonal imbalancing, addictive properties.

It’s a real vicious circle thing, like all true physical dependencies.

Only way out is to step out.

It could very well be Indigo, that your sensitivity to the literally neurochemistry destabilising effects of refined sugar, were disposing you to those sickness, choppy after days.

Maybe your adrenals, hormones are under much less stress suddenly, making the difference?

From what I understand about white sugar, that makes very plausible sense to me.

Big encouragement and congratulations on that positive lifestyle change too.

Keep going, it’s really the only right way for you to go now.

 

[ThreePointCircle]

IEC has been busy with some malfunctioning equipment. I have other samples to send them, but they said to wait. I have also mentioned this before, but the language barrier is frustrating. I will ask direct questions and get no reply. I don't think it is deliberate, but I think the translator they use may not be interpreting correctly, or their English is not entirely accurate. Not sure. I just wish I had a lab that I could pay to get the types of tests I want and the level of detail I want.

Do they include the original Spanish or just the translation?

 

[indigoaura]

Do they include the original Spanish or just the translation?

No Spanish, just English.

 

[etansel]

Mod edit: The old thread has gone over 250 pages a while ago, which is about the length we use as a soft limit for threads, which lessens the impact on our database. As such, this is the new iteration of the "What is wrong with the MDMA available today?" thread. The previous iteration of this thread can be found here

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NOTE: A handy draft summary (work-in-progress) of some of the key content covered in this thread can be accessed ⫸HERE⫷

See the second post by indigoaura in this thread for a thorough explanation of the same concepts and an overview of relevant research and theories

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Let me first give you a little background. I'm 51 years old and started doing ecstasy the last year it was legal in 1985. Needless to say the legal ecstasy from the so called "Dallas Group" was nothing short of spectacular. In 1988 I made a connection with someone from the San Francisco area who was in the production field of making MDMA. I have maintained that friendship and connection ever since with only small periods of downtime. The MDMA I get from him is an extremely fine bleach white crystalline powder that is fluffy and lays just like snow. The high from this MDMA takes about 10-15 minutes to take effect and the high is always the same. An extremely smooth come up followed by excessive love and empathy. You will literally melt into the person you're with and sex is out of this world. Touch and feel is heavenly. All you want to do is touch and feel on the person youre with and tell them how beautiful they are and how much you love them etc. There are massive eye wiggles and conversation flows like new born buddas. The come down is just as smooth as the come up. It drops you off just like a feather and sleep comes like a baby. The next day is nothing short of spectacular. You wake up feeling anti-depressed and chatty. You'll want to talk on the phone, visit friends or just drive around and enjoy the day with the top down. It's all I've ever known as an MDMA experience.

Now that brings me to modern day MDMA. There was a period back in the early 2000's when my connection was down and I scored pills from a local guy. They were great and with some very small exceptions, nearly as good as my crystalline powder. But once again I've been forced to score something locally and the stuff is just plain crap. And I mean crap. I've done both the orange Tesla's and the red Supremes. Absolutely awful, but from reading the trip reports on Pillreports, you would have thought they were the best ever. They're actually anything but. I had both of these pills tested on ecstasydata and both came back as pure MDMA.

Both of them took about 30-40 minutes to kick in and when they did, there was a slight feeling of euphoria and empathy that quickly faded and from there on out it was just a fucked up buzz. There were eye wiggles, but I wasn't feeling good when they were happening. I became extremely tired and kind of gacked out. The high from these pills seemed to last forever, maybe just because they sucked so much. I felt like a crackhead on the comedown and the next day felt like a bad MDA hangover. There was no next day afterglow at all. Just a different kind of fucked up than the night before. And that lasted the entire next day. There is a HUGE giveaway that youre doing todays crappy MDMA. Your pupils will not dialate all the way to the very edge like old school ecstasy. With old school ecstasy your pupils consume literally all of the color in your eye with only a microscopic sliver of color left around the outer edge. With modern day ecstasy your pupils will only dialate to slightly beyond normal if at all. Thats a big giveaway youre doing new school MDMA junk.

Before you jump to the assumption that this Le Junk guy is just old, hes done way to much ecstasy over the course of his lifetime and this is just a matter of tolerance, please re-read my post stating that I still have access to old school MDMA that Ive had since the 1980s. So in one hand I have modern day lab tested MDMA crap and in the other hand, old school MDMA heaven. So tolerance is out the window. Moving forward...

My question is this. Is this the best there is out there today? And since both pills tested on ecstasydata as pure MDMA, what is wrong with MDMA production nowdays? Does anyone else feel what I'm talking about here? My setting is pretty much always the same so that's not it. I always hear people talk about the setting as if that's an issue. With the crystalline powder, it doesn't matter where I am, it's always great. But with these Supremes and Teslas, it's just a sub-par, little euphoria, no real love or empathy, fucked up kinda buzz. Let me put it this way, if this was all that was available to me, I'd quit taking MDMA altogether. Terrible!

if its not absolutely adulterated my guess is you messed with your seratonin so bad the drug looses effects. try the mescaline until you build up your seratonin again. i take methylphenidate for adhd. our brains refuse to dump seratonin and dopamine and the stores cause the hyperactivity. yes adhd its real beacuse i can smoke meth and go to sleep shortly after. being able to find the work mdma has done on my brain makes it a medicine for a normal brain its a poison. every happy up has a cause and effect reaction. like coming down off cocaine. luckily adhd folks dont have this issue. also i noticed if you are rh negative your missing d antigen wont absorb or transport the co2 adulterated chemicals.

 

[etansel]

True. However, what about people who have taken MDMA less than, say, 5 times in their entire life?
I personally haven't taken it weekly or even monthly, ever. The last time I took MDMA and actually rolled was before 2007-08. The most I ever took it was perhaps twice in a month and that was back then. That entire time afterwards I have 'tried' to roll once or twice but got garbage.
I do believe in losing the magic and it's the same for ALL drugs. Obviously with things like smoking weed once you're a regular smoker the same little bud that would get you high for a few hours now doesn't. You can roll the biggest joint you want and you'll reach a point, true, but it won't be like it was when you smoked far less. That being said, you can get the magic back by simply not taking as much. Stopping taking anything at all works great too.

Still, there's no magic even after over a decade of not taking anything and never having a track record of ever using it often.

its strong in the beginning but helps adhd for abour 3-4 months after. as i have adhd. and it worked. but the first 5 hours are strong. if it can be time released it could actually motivate us hypers by finishing creative things from beginning to end. there is a mecicine in it and i bet it would also help with autism

 

[AutoTripper]

if its not absolutely adulterated my guess is you messed with your seratonin so bad the drug looses effects. try the mescaline until you build up your seratonin again. i take methylphenidate for adhd. our brains refuse to dump seratonin and dopamine and the stores cause the hyperactivity. yes adhd its real beacuse i can smoke meth and go to sleep shortly after. being able to find the work mdma has done on my brain makes it a medicine for a normal brain its a poison. every happy up has a cause and effect reaction. like coming down off cocaine. luckily adhd folks dont have this issue. also i noticed if you are rh negative your missing d antigen wont absorb or transport the co2 adulterated chemicals.

But the OP very emphatically and in detail reports having a local source for true magic MDMA as good as it ever was.

This came about upon his shock at the vastly inferior experience he had ev time on the so called modern super pills, in stark contrast to his trusted local source for soundingly spine shivering MDMA.

 

[Gaffy]

Call it sassy folks

 

[Rectify]

What is wrong with the rolls today?
Well, we are actually dead (almost all of us, anyway. This means YOU.) and are technically in Hades (and I'm not referring to the island nation by the same pronunciation in the Carribean Sea). Thus, unless you can locate pills left over from the 20th century (during the Age Of Pisces), you are pretty much SOL (shit outta luck). And I Have The Luck Of The RISHI.

 

[AutoTripper]

What is wrong with the rolls today?
Well, we are actually dead (almost all of us, anyway. This means YOU.) and are technically in Hades (and I'm not referring to the island nation by the same pronunciation in the Carribean Sea). Thus, unless you can locate pills left over from the 20th century (during the Age Of Pisces), you are pretty much SOL (shit outta luck). And I Have The Luck Of The RISHI.

This guy might not even dispute you you know. One freaky guy for sure any way.

Unmasked on Instagram: "Posted @withregram • @wokebreed Alien deception? Project blue-beam? Fake alien invasion? With all the alien talk the past 1/2 years, i feel it’s coming full circle soon. Drop your thoughts below 👇🏽"

92 likes, 9 comments - unmasked_truths_ on June 7, 2021: "Posted @withregram • @wokebreed Alien deception? Project blue-beam? Fake alien invasion? With all the alien talk the past 1/2 years, i feel it’s coming full circle soon. Drop your thoughts below 👇🏽".

www.instagram.com

 

[QuietUniverse]

lol i had a red rockstar years ago, one of the ones with the Registered or ''Trademark'' print on the back. Was waaaayyyy out of the ballpark for regular mdma. About 8 years ago in AUS if anyone remembers them/has had them? Imported or something or other lol...