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Miscellaneous Psychedelic Abuse ~ a compulsion toward escapism ~ the swirling paradigm

Tough topic, i know tribes in amazon that do ayahuasca every week.
Is that really so different from going to raves and eating acid on the regular?

I had a few years when i first started tripping.
Tried all kinds of rc's and basicly tripped once or even tvice a week.
Usually i did mxe on fridays and some tryptamines on saturday.
Then i had a few heavy years of abusing various dissios.
It ended with me selling a bunch of ket and shooting a gram a day att least.

Nowadays i trip like 2-3times a year or so.
I dont regret my past behaviour, it has left some scars but i feel very grounded.

It helped me learn how to actually learn and not just trust the books or teachers.
Feels like it boosted My IQ like 30 points.

I used to feel stupid but i know today im easily in the top 1% of smart people in my country.
But i feel its something ive trained Up by learning how to use My Brain.
Just like lifting weights can make you strong the mind needs to be trained for real.

Our schools dont offer that chance for the most part.
Its just repetition of information, not learning att all.
 
Bitchniggaz said:
Tough topic, i know tribes in amazon that do ayahuasca every week.
Is that really so different from going to raves and eating acid on the regular?

I had a few years when i first started tripping.
Tried all kinds of rc's and basicly tripped once or even tvice a week.
Usually i did mxe on fridays and some tryptamines on saturday.
Then i had a few heavy years of abusing various dissios.
It ended with me selling a bunch of ket and shooting a gram a day att least.

Nowadays i trip like 2-3times a year or so.
I dont regret my past behaviour, it has left some scars but i feel very grounded.

It helped me learn how to actually learn and not just trust the books or teachers.
Feels like it boosted My IQ like 30 points.

I used to feel stupid but i know today im easily in the top 1% of smart people in my country.
But i feel its something ive trained Up by learning how to use My Brain.
Just like lifting weights can make you strong the mind needs to be trained for real.

Our schools dont offer that chance for the most part.
Its just repetition of information, not learning att all.
Click to expand...
Can I ask what you’ve learned? With all respect - just taking lots of drugs won’t make you magically understand vector calculus, for example

learning does take repetition and practice. Though I do concede that most schools don’t help us to learn the intuition of most concepts
 
I truly feel psychedelics make you more intelligent. One major way I notice this is my vocabulary has only gone up over the years and often after a trip I’m very fluent using words that I’ve read maybe once and somehow applying it correctly. This is pretty amazing for someone who really struggled with language/writing growing up.

But they won’t just magically make you smarter, I think it comes down to an increased desire to learn as well as other healthy habits that typically come with psychedelic use.

Also those using Aya once a week, I see that as different from the person that just gluttonously consumes them far past their ability to be useful.

-GC
 
G_Chem said:
I truly feel psychedelics make you more intelligent. One major way I notice this is my vocabulary has only gone up over the years and often after a trip I’m very fluent using words that I’ve read maybe once and somehow applying it correctly. This is pretty amazing for someone who really struggled with language/writing growing up.

But they won’t just magically make you smarter, I think it comes down to an increased desire to learn as well as other healthy habits that typically come with psychedelic use.

Also those using Aya once a week, I see that as different from the person that just gluttonously consumes them far past their ability to be useful.

-GC
Click to expand...
I concur. LSD in particular I have observed such remarkably positive effects on my general cognition plus speed and groundedness of my visual imagination.

But most of all it's how I am in myself, how I am able to so confidently, calmly, articulately express myself in any situation, without struggling to find the exact words and phrases to say precisely what I want to say exactly how to say it, without feeling under any pressure, threat, or obligation at all.

Psychedellics can help us to get continually real, IMO, with ourselves and the world around us.

However, I do see LSD and Psilocybin as effective tuning forks for the brain and regenerators for the imagination.

Bit of course, they can only help you get smarter if you are capable of learning ever more for such the purpose.

You won't turn a numskull into a genius basically.
 
i Personally have used psychedelics to repair my brain from other drug use and also i have had 4 serious concussions through my life serious head injuries which destoryed my memory and ability to quickly process information yet all the LSD i did seem to have repaired my brain to a pretty high standard once again. This is proven with all the studies done and coming out aswell all psychedelics repair the brain.
 
I definitely went through a 5 month period of psychedelic "addiction" if you want to call it that, and well that's what it was.

I had always been fascinated with psychedelics from a young age but they were used moderately.

What started it was an unusually amazing LSD trip, the best trip in my life by magnitudes. This lead me to quickly horde and start producing LSD, mushrooms and DMT.

I went nuts. I was dosing multiple times per week and often smoking DMT multiple times per day. I started combining them and taking massive doses to overcome tolerance.

It got to the point where I wouldn't sleep and going to work the next day all I could think about was dosing again. I was showing clear signs of classic addiction.

Eventually, combined with chronic stress, sleep deprivation, malnutrition, alcoholism and other factors it all led to a psychotic/schizo break which I still have not fully recovered from 3+ years later. That's the only thing that broke the addiction.

I would assume psychedelic addiction is uncommon if not rare, but it is certainly real.

And "escapism" is the perfect way to describe it, at least in my case.
 
SnafuInTheVoid said:
Eventually, combined with chronic stress, sleep deprivation, malnutrition, alcoholism and other factors it all led to a psychotic/schizo break which I still have not fully recovered from 3+ years later. That's the only thing that broke the addiction.
.
Click to expand...
A psychotic break broke it for me too

I was never dosing as much as you were but it was no doubt becoming an addiction. I would macro dose every two weeks regularly and also micro or light doses sprinkled in there too. Coupled with heavy marijuana use

it took a 300 ug + massive joint trip for me to realize what was gonna happen if I kept this up. Lucy gave me a glimpse of the psychosis that was awaiting me if I stayed on that path
 
thegreenhand said:
Can I ask what you’ve learned? With all respect - just taking lots of drugs won’t make you magically understand vector calculus, for example

learning does take repetition and practice. Though I do concede that most schools don’t help us to learn the intuition of most concepts
Click to expand...

Ive been training martial arts for almost 20years.
During this time ive studied alot of topics around the human body.
Diet, physics, biologi,biomechanichs, neurologi etc.
Both by myself through books and podcasts, but also through real educations in sports science and physical therapy.

I def get your point, doing psychedelics can give you a false sense of knowing everything att times.
My experience is more that it helped me question dogma.
Alot of people today think science is this clean cut thing and if a scientist say something then it has to be true.

However of you indulge in the actual studies and cross examnine different ideologies its obvious that the whole research field is as corrupt as any religion.

So by not getting attached to any theory and keeping a open mind i have been able to study many paroxadol viewpoints from several angles.

I work with training and physical therapy and many people who knows way more then me are usually impressed with how i see things.
I think this is from doing alot of inner work and be able to see the bigger picture where alot of people zoom in way to much.
 
The low harm and addictiveness of psychedelics are what have always attracted me to them, from a young age. Psychedelics have never been anywhere close to an addiction for me. They've been anti-addictive by making me aware of smaller addictions, and made it easy for me to reduce drinking for example, and the psychedelics themselves have never become habitual, despite my having a rather obsessive personality.

But sometimes I see that they do exert a peculiar kind of addiction, or maybe more optimistically, a memetic symbiosis. Psychedelics have this way of drawing people into their colourful universe and inspiring them to make art and music that's conducive to the psychedelic mind, which in turn propagates to turning more people on to psychedelics. Looking back, a good portion of my life was dedicated to creating music that is essentially for the psychedelic dancefloor, and I never would have pursued and realized this goal if it weren't for inspiration received during some tripped out starry nights raving on acid. I can see how a paranoid outsider (or insider) could personify these psychedelics as puppet-masters luring their victims in to a self-perpetuating cult of hedonism and introspection. I've definitely had a lot of laughs pursuing the lines of that paranoid fantasy during an acid trip or two.

Anyways, this has been so far one of the most interesting threads I've seen on here for a long while, and have read the whole thing hungrily.
 
G_Chem said:
I’ve got a family member who Id say is addicted to psychedelics. To the point where me and my wife pretty much had to more or less drop him from our lives... It was hard to do too cuz I felt some guilt.

He’s the kind of guy that isn’t very socially adept, so when he’s trying to manipulate me for more drugs when I’ve grown up around addicts it comes across as cringe’y and annoying.

The last two times we hung with him he made it really awkward. I’ll tell them both.

So second to last time we hung with him he was about to head to jail for awhile and wanted one last hurrah. Me, my wife, him (wife’s family), and a couple of his (we’ll call him Z) friends head up to a remote cabin to trip for the weekend.

I as usual brought everything along. I gave them all more than enough to enjoy the weekend, and him even more knowing he’d be heading off soon.

The second night he just kept eating more and more psychedelics, smoking seems nonstop. It got to the point where I felt like giving him anymore was a waste of good drugs.

Then he starts trying to, very shitily I might add, manipulate me into giving him more. I’m very smart logical guy so kept shutting down all his reasoning. It was getting really weird cuz two mins later he’d try again, it was obvious to me and my wife he was just sitting there dwelling on more more more..

Next he did something that really pissed me off, he was like “I’ll give you any amount of money you want, why did you bring stuff along you didn’t want to share?” Which I quickly responded, “just because I bring my stash doesn’t mean you get it all..”

It got so weird I had to just say enough and go off to own room.

Next incident happened couple years back and was our last time seeing him.

I should start with the fact we had a female friend with us too freshly single, we told him and he went all “nice guy” on us too.

It was a long stressful weekend but essentially he was expecting us to babysit him and keep him from using too much yet simultaneously fighting us every step of the way.

The first night he tried a little K for his first time swearing he’d only do one. Next morning he’s in my tent begging me to get him a gram cuz “he swears he’ll only do a little then sell the rest.” I don’t get it for him but someone else does, then proceeds to act like an ass the rest of the weekend all faded,

The girl he thought he had a chance with he got all creepy about.. He kept following her around all weird, and when my other guy friend saw what was happening and tried protecting her a bit he got all pissy acting like he was “owed” her or something simply cuz we told him she was single.

In essence some of the most self entitled BS I’d ever seen. It was this experience that woke me up to the whole nice guy phenomenon, I didn’t even know it was a thing before this but open seeing that subreddit it screamed his exact actions.

I don’t know how I kept it all together that weekend because I had to deal with everyone’s emotions over this shit. I had to keep him kinda happy cuz he had a head full of acid and kept pulling that “woe is me” shit, I was worried he’d do something dumb. Had to keep my wife from freaking out how her family was acting. Had to keep friends feeling safe. All while I was balls deep myself...

Sorry had to vent about that shit. Addiction to other drugs is one thing but psychedelic addiction is very frustrating for me.

-GC
Click to expand...
@G_Chem I'm sorry. That must have sucked. If I were about to go to jail, I'm not sure I'd call psychedelic use a hurrah at all, last or otherwise. I wouldn't want to babysit that person either. I've been addicted to other drugs in the past so I've spent time both sides of the fence. Psychedelics aren't available to me all like that (enough to get addicted to or use with any kind of regularity), but his behavior surprises me. Heroin was my demon, and if you switch your friend and doses with me and H, I could see something similar happening. I'm not a "professional" psychonaut or anything, just a fan, but nothing about his behavior was even a shade of psychedelic as far as I have experienced. Sounds like feeding him any was a waste of good drugs, let alone feeding him more. Just wanted to say he's blessed to have you as a friend.

As far as psychedelic abuse in general goes.... The only psychedelic substance that is around me with any kind of regularity is DXM, but I seem to recognize my desire to escape (thanks to heroin addiction?) before it gets bad and stop myself, thankfully. That being said, I personally feel (from a position of zero authority whatsoever) like psychedelics are abused long before they hinder your life or you start escaping from problems with them. The time between trips is important and belongs there. Since I've never just had doses on deck though, not sure how much my opinion counts for.

It's like masturbating. Sure, I can jerk 10x per day if I try, but if I do, I'll be sore, won't have much fun, and will eventually be shooting blanks. A ton of effort for very little reward. The recharge time is part of the package. 😂 Keeping with the theme, there's no right or wrong amount to masturbate, just like there's not a set frequency one should trip. You just gotta feel it out (sorry, couldn't help myself).

In all seriousness, for me it isn't like a vitamin I should take every day. It's a tool to be used when needed for healing, growth or fun.
 
Yeah dissociatives (like DXM) are way more commonly addictive for people than proper psychedelics. I know tons of people who struggle with ketamine or other dissos, and there are a ton in this forum over the years, too. I know people who won't touch psychedelics who are total K-heads. Some people don't get addicted to dissos (like me, I don't want to be on dissociatives usually), but for those that feel the pull, they can be extremely addictive. it seems far more common for people to abuse dissociatives than it is for people to abuse psychedelics.
 
Dissociatives are just as addicting for me as Heroin is, i will not stop using them until they are all gone. And it doesnt matter how much ive got ive had couple grams PCP analogs and i will do the stuff daily for a month and go completely off my rocker. I prefer to get Ketamine or MXE analogs cuz i could just binge a half gram or whatever i have and its gone. If i do a massive dose it doesn't to long and they arent super potent. Like 3-MeO-PCP for instance i can fet pretty outta hand with generally and i will try and convince you all is well, when it most definitely is not. Honestly i probably have more will power and control with Opioids cuz i can take the appropriate amounts of my maintenance meds when i need to. I have to have friends hold the dissos for me.
 
I’d have to agree that im more prone to disso use than psychedelics. Thankfully novel disso are hard to come by here and I haven’t any irl connects for them.

Dxm is easy to obtain though and when I first came by powdered hbr I often went overboard, dosing 2 or 3 times a weekend. And I quickly lost the magic. Even some time off didn’t, in the matter of months, didn’t really bring it back. So it’s been about 4 months since I’ve dosed. Even longer since I’ve dosed psychedelics.

Because I lose the magic with psychedelics in a similar manner,
Though admittedly it returns faster for me than with dissos, I find it odd that people become addicted to psyches. But I’ve seen it, and see it posted online, here and elsewhere. Suppose it’s like any addiction though
 
Bitchniggaz said:
Tough topic, i know tribes in amazon that do ayahuasca every week.
Is that really so different from going to raves and eating acid on the regular?

I had a few years when i first started tripping.
Tried all kinds of rc's and basicly tripped once or even tvice a week.
Usually i did mxe on fridays and some tryptamines on saturday.
Then i had a few heavy years of abusing various dissios.
It ended with me selling a bunch of ket and shooting a gram a day att least.

Nowadays i trip like 2-3times a year or so.
I dont regret my past behaviour, it has left some scars but i feel very grounded.

It helped me learn how to actually learn and not just trust the books or teachers.
Feels like it boosted My IQ like 30 points.

I used to feel stupid but i know today im easily in the top 1% of smart people in my country.
But i feel its something ive trained Up by learning how to use My Brain.
Just like lifting weights can make you strong the mind needs to be trained for real.

Our schools dont offer that chance for the most part.
Its just repetition of information, not learning att all.
Click to expand...

The thing with the first part of your really good post is that the Western world doesn't understand what doing ayahuasca every week means. Our culture considers superficial attachments to what we do and consequently what we believe about what we do vastly more important than the underlying significance and connection that lies beneath all that. People blindly go into shops to buy smartphones and for us in the West this IS a ceremony in that we are seen 'improving' our lives by simply replicating what we believe and what we are told and what we expect is the role involved. We are pretenders, essentially. We put on fancy dress and we believe we are police officers, firemen, judges etc but we don't actually live the life that creates an identity like that. Even actual police officers, some of them anyway, are attached to the role of police officer more than actually understanding what that line of duty actually infers on society at a larger level.

Many of us meditate but we meditate to accrue points on our meditation app so that we can be SEEN as being superior and that somehow equates to being further along the path than those who have 1 star on their profile instead of 4. There are people who have been meditating for their entire life who are no closer to finding what they seek than someone who has just downloaded a meditation app for the first time. Yet here is where the delusion is - we LIE to ourselves everyday thinking we are making progress and we are who we see we are and that we deserve recognition, approval, validation, acceptance. We do this so much we actually cause violence as a result, hence the state of the planet right now and the events unfolding therein/on.

The difference between the Western world (and arguably every other corner of the world that hasn't maintained and preserved these cultures), the latter see beyond the illusions. The life they know is closer to what it means to understand what a weekly ceremony ACTUALLY stands for in the context of community, connection, transformation, growth, potential etc. Their lives are true and reflect the values and benefits that come from rituals like weekly ceremonies that have helped them to preserve their culture for hundreds and thousands of years. Instead of pretending to do, they actually do. They make a difference in their own lives, even if it's on a macro scale and only relevant to their community. It must be relevant to the world though because thanks to these indigneous communities, ayahuasca is now something known worldwide. Who would have thought some of the oldest cultures who haven't been swallowed up by the modern world would have more to offer than all the riches, status and material than the rest of the modern world? Something is wrong there, surely?

For a change to occur it has to be on a deeper level beyond all the bullsh*t and well, that's very hard to let go of without a serious bashing of your ego and curbing of your narcissism. Most people are too bothered about keeping up the delusion so long as they can live their 'normal' lives. The very 'normal' that has caused so many issues in the first place. The very 'normal' that has eradicated all connection to deeper and more meaningful relationships with what exists beyond this very thin and superficial layer of reality.
 
@finitelifeform
so real but so full of vitriol,
there is no one solution.

the real thing is habit which you call attachment.
not seeing that this is one thing that you can change using relaxation and insight is a mistake on your part.
heavy dose blasts, interfere with habit only for a short time.
you rant against the behavior of others, and assign incorrect goals for people doing meditation and failing to achieve those goals. wrong and wrong again.

sure we love to do psychedelics and be enlightened or enchanted for a few hours, I like that option.
However, the treatment for seeing ego-habits in action, and adjusting them permanently requires gentleness and perseverance, bashing is indelicate - it can reveal a lot, change occurs when you are ready for it, and that needs some preparation.
 
pupnik said:
@finitelifeform
so real but so full of vitriol,
there is no one solution.

the real thing is habit which you call attachment.
not seeing that this is one thing that you can change using relaxation and insight is a mistake on your part.
heavy dose blasts, interfere with habit only for a short time.
you rant against the behavior of others, and assign incorrect goals for people doing meditation and failing to achieve those goals. wrong and wrong again.

sure we love to do psychedelics and be enlightened or enchanted for a few hours, I like that option.
However, the treatment for seeing ego-habits in action, and adjusting them permanently requires gentleness and perseverance, bashing is indelicate - it can reveal a lot, change occurs when you are ready for it, and that needs some preparation.
Click to expand...
Maybe it is vitriolic but surely there has to be a line drawn in the sand at some point because everybody refusing to confront these core issues is precisely what makes them linger. When you can't identify wrong from right and you can't point to the thing(s) that is/are causing issues you can't fix the issues. You have to call a sh*t for a sh*t sometimes, in my opinion anyway.

Habit, yes, true. How many can break their habits? Attachment/habit, both require commitment and not solely to the identification with the identity/process of removing them but actually with the ACTUAL work on doing the work. The identification IS the trap.

It wasn't a rant, moreover a perspective that I've seen echoed throughout my life learning about all things that relate to what I'm talking about. Behaviour IS the issue after all and this is one major issue in our society whereby we are happy to commit to things without thinking of the consequences. The whole idea of people being on autopilot or being sheep pretty much confirms this - the mindless nature of our direction as a society while most are not even aware of what they do, perhaps only on the superficial level. I'm not bashing meditation either, I'm just saying that it's often used as a crux to identify not with the actual process but with the contrived and superficial perceptions of what it means to meditate ie to be a meditator. Again mindless in that people do the same thing they do during their normal everyday waking lives only they do it under the guise of meditation.

You're more suited for going about things gently. I get that and there's a time and a place for it, in my opinion. What most people need is that initial kick to get them to see what they otherwise wouldn't bring themselves to see. The process moving on is easier after that because you can't unsee the reality of your world after a heavy experience and that's the starting point for most people - having that one profound trip that changes everything. Sure, it might not change them forever but on a deeper level that door has been opened and they are now open to understanding things aren't exactly as they seem.
 
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