So idk what it is, I’m guessing just my chemical imbalance or preexisting undiagnosed shit, I can eat WAY more on speed than I can normally. Normally my stomach is constantly upset. I can’t sleep, I am depressed as fuck, I can’t eat and don’t want to because I’m either stressed or hyper focused on my weight. Not a tolerance thing. I CAN stay awake on it. But I still go to bed everyday before my boyfriend who just drinks. Sleep fine. I just don’t get how other people stay awake for days and don’t eat. Every since I first did it, twenty minutes after I did it I’d be starving. My boyfriend can do a couple hits of the same stuff and be up for three days and have a hard time eating for a week and is a dick the whole time after he comes down, hence why he doesn’t do it. But it makes me feel so fucking normal and happy it’s stupid. Before I started using it regularly I used to wonder what it was like to just go a day without thinking about killing myself. I self harmed. Like, my ex just told me how happy and healthy (used to be hella anorexic) I look and then I told him I’d been fucking around with speed and he told me he would have never in a million years guessed. I wish I didn’t have to feel bad about using it when alcohol was actively killing me and I smoked a pack a day as recent as two weeks ago and since I’ve been using it pretty often I stopped drinking and smoking cigarettes.
I wish I didn’t have to feel bad about this. Does anyone else use it and not get like “high”? I have to do an insane amount to feel any body high. And I also notice it stays in my system a lot longer than most people. Don’t get it haha. Just wondering how many more use it like this not to get high but just be okay and actually sleep and eat on it?
I wish I didn’t have to feel bad about this. Does anyone else use it and not get like “high”? I have to do an insane amount to feel any body high. And I also notice it stays in my system a lot longer than most people. Don’t get it haha. Just wondering how many more use it like this not to get high but just be okay and actually sleep and eat on it?