Benzos HELP! I want to safely stop taking Xanax! Will THC oil help?

[Akina25]

Hi guys!
First time on here but I need help. Short history about me. I started having anxiety and panic attacks in my early teens and by the age of 19 was diagnosed with anxiety, depression and panic disorder but by this point I was already self medicating with alcohol and a raging alcoholic by the age of 20. I got sober for a few years when I turned 22 and relapsed at 25 and then had an on and off sober/relapse thing going for a little over 4 years but Im happy to say that I have been sober from alcohol for 6 and a half years now!! Yaayyy! Now for the shitty part... I have always had a prescription for Xanax since about the age of 23 (Just turned 37) but I didn't take them very often...Normally gave them to friends. But, about 3 years ago I quit taking celexa without tapering and I had a multiple series of traumatizing events that caused me to start having more anxiety and panic and I started taking my Xanax daily... First it was .5 mg per dose twice a day, them 1 mg twice a day.. Fast-forward past all the tolerance build up and I am now taking 8 mg per day... Sometimes 9 if I cant sleep.
I want to start tapering and I have gotten down to 7 but then I'll go back up to my normal dose when I'm having bad days.
How can I taper safely? I have a history of seizures but oddly enough, I only had them when I was super drunk. I haven't had one since I stopped drinking. I think that this high dose through-out the day is making me moody, cloudy headed and a crying mess that can rarely leave me bed. I was a 1st grade teacher until March of this year. I loved my job. But, I found out I was pregnant In January and my docs started a fast taper to try and get me off before the baby implanted. I ended up losing the baby, only took 4 days off work instead of the recommended 2 weeks and I went to work and had a complete freak-out screaming in the principals office that I wanted to kill myself and told her and all the admin that were in there to go F**k themselves and threw my badge in the principals face and quit on the spot. I was in middle of a severe panic attack and had no idea what I was doing or saying at the time...Just a screaming rambling mess.. One of my friends was present in the meeting and she had to fill me in on almost everything I said and did because I completely blacked out during my screaming freak out.
So, Enough of that...The point is... Xanax is ruining my life. I want to taper on my own. I can't go to a rehab due to quitting my job and no longer having insurance.
My question is, Does anyone know how much I should taper down and how often should I change the dose when tapering? I am so scared I am going to start having seizures or bad withdrawals.
Now, I do have access to the medical dispensaries in Colorado and I just picked up a syringe of an Indica 60/40 blend. 60%THC/40%CBD. I haven't tried it yet but will this help with the tapering process? I got it more for the anti-seizure properties than anything.
Other suggestions are welcome. I just want off this crap as safe and painlessly as possible. All I have read so far is the horror stories of trying to kick this drug
Thank you in advance for any feedback

 

[benzoboss]

I would go for a higher cbd concetrations.
Bc benzo rehab can give you anxiety.
And the thc can makr that worse.
Cbd will help whit the seizures, anxiety,and insomnia caused by benzo wd.

I recommend you to go to your doctor snd talk about this.
Good luck bro

 

[shartito]

Talk to your doctor about tapering. He may switch you to diazepam and slowly lower your dose over time. This is the safest way. If you've already had seizures, you don't want to fuck with benzo WD on your own. Do it the right way, as safe as possible.

That would be my advice.

Not saying the oils can't help, by all means use those too. But I would highly recommend a proper taper using a long half life benzo.

Edit - sorry - missed the part about no more insurance. If you're on good terms with your doctor; see if you can just talk to him on the phone. He might write you the necessary scripts that way. Otherwise a single visit to get the scripts might be necessary, which will be a little pricier without insurance, but worth the cost if you can borrow the money or something. I think tapering down yourself on the Xanax will be unsafe.

 

[Akina25]

I would go for a higher cbd concetrations.
Bc benzo rehab can give you anxiety.
And the thc can makr that worse.
Cbd will help whit the seizures, anxiety,and insomnia caused by benzo wd.

I recommend you to go to your doctor snd talk about this.
Good luck bro

Thank you for the feedback! I currently don't have insurance but when we tried to taper the first time they prescribed me lamictal for the seizure risk but I had an allergic reaction to it so I had to stop taking it. I read that CBD doesn't prevent seizures but is great for anxiety. That is why I thought I needed the THC/CBD blend.
Also, read something about taking a GABA replacement to help with the anxiety but I don't think they can be taken together until I'm tapered to a super low dose... All this crap is so confusing on the "Dos & Dont's".

 

[Akina25]

Thank you!
I agree. I don't want to risk my life over not going to the Dr.
I have tried doing as much research as possible and every time I think I found a good plan I find another site with conflicting information. I'll just have to figure out my finances and go back to my Dr. I'm too afraid to do this on mu own.

 

[shartito]

The internet is full of bad advice. Switching to a diazepam taper from Xanax is pretty much the textbook taper method. Good luck! Keep us posted!

 

[benzoboss]

Your tolerance for gaba will be to high. You will probably not notice much.

 

[Akina25]

Thank you!! I called my Doc and she offered to see me for half of what she normally charges for cash paying patients. I see her next Tuesday

 

[Akina25]

Your tolerance for gaba will be to high. You will probably not notice much.

I was doing a little research on GABA supplements but I couldn't find much info on if they were safe to take while tapering. What I read is that long term benzo use can deplete your brain of GABA and most people end up slowly uping their dosages again due to the lack of GABA in the brain. I saw one supplement called Gabatone Active (K-39) & the other was GabaCore (K-93). Do you think these would be helpful once I'm tapered to at least half of what I was taking?
Today has been decent so far. I have started the taper by 1/8 less per dose so far and have avoided coffee to help keep anxiety at bay. I know once I start getting lower it will get much harder so that's why I'm trying to prepare with supplements and anything else that might help this go as smoothly as possible which I know will be tough no matter what but maybe with good research and supplements it won't suck as bad.... I hope...

 

[Akina25]

Thank you all for your support and advice by the way!

 

[Purple12]

@Akina, what I tell you won't be what you want to hear, but it will be what you already know you must admit in order to survive this rat's nest of confusion you've set up to avoid the facts of your situation. First, there is no way you can recover from the profound degree of addiction you are in without professional help. You must find a way of getting your job back. Be honest and tell them you need medical help to deal with the kind of episode they saw you go through when you tried to quit. If they will allow you to recover your position, you must promise to go through full rehab, not because you have to, but because you know you will die if you do not go through rehab. If you are fortunate enough to recover your job and medical benefits, here's why you want to go through the program. You have no skills with which to fight off the need to return to benzos when you are anxious. And if you can't resist benzos short term, how will you avoid getting back on the roller coaster that you are currently on. You must find alternative methods for dealing with anxiety in your day to day life. I know it's unimaginable right now, but that's what they show you how to do. That's how you get your life back. This pipe dream of weaning yourself off of Xanax does not address the core issue of your problem and it won't work. I promise. Please believe me. I have been on everything and I was lucky enough to not have an addictive personality. I was able to drift on and off of most drugs. When I finally found my perfect drug of choice, it was because I had been a chronic pain patient and needed the pain control. When I got enough medication to control my lifelong pain, I stopped abusing. I was prescribed more medication than i could take, so I just collected extras until I told my doctor to reduce my meds. So I am not unfamiliar with drug abuse.
I have a friend who became addicted first to Vicodin on a massive scale. He went to rehab. Years later he became out of control on all the benzos his doctor had him on. He went to rehab. He recovered. He told me there was no contest between the two rehabs. He said going off Vicodin was nothing compared to recovering from benzo addiction. They put him on phenobarbital to keep him from dying from the seizures so common with benzo reductions. You can't try at home benzo recovery without a doctor. It's madness.
Please get professional help with your problem. It's much bigger than drugs. You MUST get your medical benefits back and I do believe most companies will work with you if you're honest with them about your explosive behavior being a symptom of your medical problem, not your feelings about them, personally.