New member trying to help s/O withdraw CT from opiates

[Pbgj2001]

Hi all,
I'm a new member currently attempting to help s/o withdraw from opiates. Today is day 1 for this attempt. Been down this road before a couple times.
He's refusing my help because he's blaming his addiction on me. Any suggestions to help someone detox that hates you are more than welcome.
Thanks

 

[DogLover123757]

Hello and welcome, I truly wish you the best as you are searching for assistance. I know this is damn near impossible but if you can look past the outbursts, the blame being put on you, and all the immature behavior it will help your S/O tremendously. You will also have to handle a roller coaster of emotions, borderline bi-polar disorder, and content for 1 second than blasting off for 1 hour. You are the most important entity that your S/O has in the support category. I am sure now it doesn't seem possible but speaking from experience, someone being in their corner is a true blessing and gift. There are literally tons of threads on here that will provide you with a lot of information on everything from drug withdrawal to supporting a loved one. Just know that you are not alone and tens of millions of people just in this country are going through your exact situation. You are going to have to deal with some strong negative, emotional outbursts, maybe even some verbal abuse. these are just guesses, I am in no position to give a concrete list of issues that will happen. I just know that if your love and positive energy can bust through the brick wall of negative things you will have achieved a victory in that category and you will be doing your S/O so much good. Do you feel comfortable saying what substances are being used? Also how much and at what frequency? If so that will be useful, either way I wish you the best as you work your way through this obstacle on your life's journey. Hang in there and hopefully many more knowledgeable people will share their experiences.

 

[Pbgj2001]

Upwards of 30 pills a day mix of vicodin, percocet, opana, oxymorphine? He started a couple years ago, just recently really ramped it up to this level. I'd say over past couple months. He did a good job hiding it since he has complete control over all money.

 

[DogLover123757]

Upwards of 30 pills a day mix of vicodin, percocet, opana, oxymorphine? He started a couple years ago, just recently really ramped it up to this level. I'd say over past couple months. He did a good job hiding it since he has complete control over all money.

Hey, yes that is a pretty healthy habit. Have you ever thought of approaching him and discussing the legal risks he is taking because of this? Sometimes jail is a damn good motivator. I don't know how he reacts to a sit down, but if you can get him to sit at the table or couch etc. you can ask him about putting together a taper schedule for all these pills. It's something that you can do together. These are just suggestions I totally understand if none of this is possible right now. I remember how fucked up and completely out of my mind I was, with absolutely no connection to reality. So any thing that gets through just try to mention activities you can do together, and you can start chipping away at the bricks. Anyways I truly hope that you can overcome this difficult area of life and your S/O can be back to sober living.

 

[bumbee]

Is he refusing your help but still trying to taper down? I feel for you. My habit cost me big time - friends and family, etc. I finally had to make a decision because I was running out of cash to fuel the addiction. Essentially, I started with 1 idea.
1. I was ready to feel like crap
2. I had to remove 1 script at a time
3. break the pills into pieces
4. drink wine or beer or take benadryl or something other than opiates to try and sleep as much as possible
5. accept that I was going to feel like crap for as long as it takes
6. BLOCK THE DEALERS - AS HARD AS THAT IS - MOVE IF I HAD TO

I ended up moving to Florida where I couldn't get my hands on any more pain killers - and it sucked for over a year BUT IT GOT BETTER

 

[Pbgj2001]

He doesnt care about the legal risks. He actually is prescribed opana, percocet, and oxymorphine. Of course not at those levels. He's not tapering. We've tried that more times than I can count and tapering doesn't work for him. It has to be CT. He finally gave in a took kratom about 4 am because the rls and stuffy nose. It's so odd that sneezing and runny/stuffy nose is a symptom. He won't block the dealers. He won't let me block the money. (he works I stay at home). I've tried being nice, mean, fair, numb, etc. Taken him to rehab and checks himself out. Got him appointment to get on subs, he was scared and wouldn't take what the Dr prescribed so it didn't work. He's better today so far. Now he's talking about kratom being his new Doc. I don't understand the addiction process I guess because I asked him why can't he just use the kratom to combat the opiate withdrawal then wean off kratom. Nope, go big or go home apparently. Thanks everyone

 

[DogLover123757]

He doesnt care about the legal risks. He actually is prescribed opana, percocet, and oxymorphine. Of course not at those levels. He's not tapering. We've tried that more times than I can count and tapering doesn't work for him. It has to be CT. He finally gave in a took kratom about 4 am because the rls and stuffy nose. It's so odd that sneezing and runny/stuffy nose is a symptom. He won't block the dealers. He won't let me block the money. (he works I stay at home). I've tried being nice, mean, fair, numb, etc. Taken him to rehab and checks himself out. Got him appointment to get on subs, he was scared and wouldn't take what the Dr prescribed so it didn't work. He's better today so far. Now he's talking about kratom being his new Doc. I don't understand the addiction process I guess because I asked him why can't he just use the kratom to combat the opiate withdrawal then wean off kratom. Nope, go big or go home apparently. Thanks everyone

Hey if he is saying that Kratom is his new DOC that is a huge step in the right direction. Kratom is far less harmful to the body and mind and it will be a million times easier to come off of. I totally understand if it was just a quick statement, and that he would rather take the opiates. Those were good ideas you had about controlling the money and maybe even dispensing his doses for him. Are there any family members on his side that you could go to with those ideas and see in they will assist you with a united front? A team effort to approach him? It seems as you have done almost everything you can, but as the old saying goes the addict has to choose to want to quit. It has to come from within the mind and soul. So again best wishes and I hope something positive breaks for you.

 

[Pbgj2001]

Unfortunately he doesn't trust any friends or family, including me. With drugs or money. He's a total control freak.

 

[DogLover123757]

Unfortunately he doesn't trust any friends or family, including me. With drugs or money. He's a total control freak.

I know the type, have some people in my life who act the same way. If he does start using more and more Kratom, his personality will mellow out and I believe he will become much more accommodating with your needs and desires for your relationship. It's the opiates that are making him high strung and acting like a control freak. I truly hope she can smooth out on the Kratom, you will be so much happier which is what it sounds like you deserve since you have endured his behavior. How is the balance between the opiates and Kratom? Just your best guess? So hang in there and I truly hope you get some relief here soon.