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Seeing the truth, knowing the truth, believing the lies

pofacedhoe said:
nodding means he is taking enough to be high if you were tapering you would not be nodding ffs

thats so obvious

having taken a lot of poppies in the past and been very affected (itching, euphoria, relaxation) but nowhere near nodding. its a sign he's off his face. the difference between having a drink and being drunk. nodding is like drunk equivalent
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Absolutely - I would of course would not dispute an single iota of this - I'm just trying to suggest that not all of these appearances may be 'nods' - but with the, at the very least, still regular (if not constant) use of what I assume are short acting oral poppies, and the OP's previous experience of this drug effect, it should be fairly easy to discern whether or not this is actually the case.

And while the frequent bathroom trips sound encouraging in one sense, if we were to proceed from a place of suspicion, well, is this a genuine reason for the frequent disappearances...

I've never used used pharm grade pop products with the exception of codeine, dihydrocodeine amd methadone so again this is just speculation, but if one was to take an active dose of Percocet would they then be experiencing w/d symptoms as bad as loose bowels so early into the w/d syndrome, if one were to even experience any wd at such an early stage of the game while still using these pills on what appears to be at least a daily basis....

I'm not trying to confuse or deliberately 180 neg out the situation after my previous comments, but I do like to pick up on positives where I can, but looking at this objectively.... :\
 
Broken74 said:
I've tried directing him to different sites, reading articles or blogs to him. He just comes across exhausted of me not believing him. I've even taken video of him while he has nodded out, in effort that he can see what I am witnessing and understand why I don't believe him. And possibly see what it does to him, so he can see for himself that's not what he wants for his life. He refuses to watch them.
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The problem is that it's incredibly easy for people to continue to lie, even in the face of overwhelming evidence that they are doing so. I was actually just thinking about this the other day. I can remember things like in first school my parents would ask where my homework was and I'd just make up some kind of ridiculous yet remotely feasible excuse. The excuse was so obviously a lie, and yet in the end I completed school without doing any homework; just the occasional questioning from my parents. But I always knew that if I just gave them something, then I'd continue to get away with it.

So basically, sometimes people demand an answer, so you just say any old stuff, because you're protecting yourself/your way of life. And often that's enough for people to back off. You both know it's an excuse/lie, and a pretty shit one at that. But it's just enough to let it go for a while. I guess it's a case of ignorance is bliss. Your mind settles..for a time. But the problem still niggles. We all do this, and we all end up on the receiving end.

Obviously this is a pretty big deal in your case. I'd say that this is a pretty common response for an addict to give, so take some palace from the fact that this isn't particularly indicative of any individual negative aspects to his personality... His body/brain/mind are just trying to get sustain the influx of opioid action, using the same technique we all do.

I don't know what the course of action is, but youre going to have to lay your cards on the table for him somehow. He needs to k ow that you're not fucking about and he's not going to get away with delaying change via excuses. This is going to mean acting on your words, whatever they may be.
 
steewith2ees said:
Good to hear B74, you are unlikely to be in a opi - induced 'nod' while withdrawing but although one usually becomes restless and unable to sleep, this can cycle with periods of semi - consciousness - folk in w/d probably get more rest and micro - sleeps than they give themselves credit for but during periods when they appear to space out (or nod off) they should be instantly rousable
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Absolutely easily reusable, every time. Just a simple clearing of my throat, or soaking his name gently....which is what I meant by its different.

AND for the bathroom trip frequencies, you and I are on the same page. That could go either way. But he would be companion about his tummy for a bit b4 going in there and he is also audibly gaseous?...and...he brought several pkgd anti-diareahal meds with him.

I was curious myself about the point you raise: if any opiates in the system, even small dosages, would you experience symptoms of w/d. I don't know that answer, but I've been questioning it myself. Either way, I know he is not getting blitzed out of his gourd. Not to the point he was, and I'm not expecting over night 360 degree sobriety, just want to know we are moving in the right direction. I suspect by Wednesday or so I should see enough to let me know if he is staying the course or not.

Thanks all, everyone one of your replies help my mental anguish at the very least. I really felt like there was nobody to talk to, before coming to bluelight. I'll keep you posted.
Love n Light~
 
In the 1st paragraph 'reusable' should be rousable & 'soaking' should be speaking. Can not edit from my mobile...reason for double post
 
Ah man Broken 74 my heart goes out to you my darling.
Your partner obviously doesn't grasp the deepness of concern and hurt that he's causing you coz he's so numbed out!!!

It's shit all round and I've been in both positions so understand both sides BUT I don't know what I can advise............except keep trying your best to support this man if he's your love and keep your pecker up and if you can't keep it up put it in your pocket for safe keeping!!!

I'm thinking o you pet lambee!!!
 
It's been back aND forth. He's currently at a "I've been 3 days clean phase" I think it was more like 2, he started feeling sick and then used yesterday. Which if that's the case and we were open about it, I could handle that. It would be a form of tapering and at least I know he was trying. The nodding last night was crazy, so i went to bed angry. Told him I don't like the redundancy of it. And of course opiods take away any sense of pleasure from normal things so I'm tired of sitting in a bedroom. Thx for checking in Stee!!! I'd say we talk about things more often but it's more aggravating on both ends. Something will change soon one way or another. I need to get back to me. I'm a very positive jovial upbeat person and I see myself being depressed, I probably am. Ppl are always asking what's wrong these days. I need to be smiling again.
 
Really hope things improve with you two : )

You're doing everything you can but he's obviously not putting in the effort. Getting clean is a fucking war and you would definitely be seeing the fight in his body and mind. It doesn't happen overnight either... it takes a really long time to recover. I just finished Day 8, and I am still kicking around like a fish out of water sometimes. It's fucked, but I wish you and him the best. Getting your (well, my=D) dick sucked is way better than any amount of that shit. It's just selfish, and I've been guilty of this type of neglect as well. Felt like I was dating a fucked up, expensive chemical instead of a woman. There's nothing more emasculating really.
 
ShroomySatori said:
Really hope things improve with you two : )

You're doing everything you can but he's obviously not putting in the effort. Getting clean is a fucking war and you would definitely be seeing the fight in his body and mind. It doesn't happen overnight either... it takes a really long time to recover. I just finished Day 8, and I am still kicking around like a fish out of water sometimes. It's fucked, but I wish you and him the best. Getting your (well, my=D) dick sucked is way better than any amount of that shit. It's just selfish, and I've been guilty of this type of neglect as well. Felt like I was dating a fucked up, expensive chemical instead of a woman. There's nothing more emasculating really.
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I'm so angry, he just nearly drove me head on into a parked car because he nodded off driving. I'm looking at my phone and glance up to see us completely on the wrong side of the road. I scream his name over n over and he swerved at the last second!!!

But... hes not high. He just looked away for a second. OMFG are you even kidding me?? So still he will deny to protect that addiction, even at the expense of injuring innocent lives.
 
Not much to say there B74, apart from the fact that your super cool to have stuck with it this far. The 3 day thing sounds about right, if he is getting sick as a result of short acting poppy use then the w/d syndrome is usually at it's worst around the 72 hour mark, which is where many folk lapse / relapse...

We're all still reading xx
 
Please don't narcan him just for knodding off, that is kinda the point.

Narcan is for when someone is not breathing or turning blue. Usually at that point all you can do is narcan, cpr, and pray.

You need to talk to him. You could suggest some things like methadone, suboxone, or a pain clinic.

He needs to get his use under control to where he is functional. If you marry an addict all you can really ask is that they stay functional. You can't get in a relationship hoping to change someone much.
 
ShroomySatori said:
Really hope things improve with you two : )

You're doing everything you can but he's obviously not putting in the effort. Getting clean is a fucking war and you would definitely be seeing the fight in his body and mind. It doesn't happen overnight either... it takes a really long time to recover. I just finished Day 8, and I am still kicking around like a fish out of water sometimes. It's fucked, but I wish you and him the best. Getting your (well, my=D) dick sucked is way better than any amount of that shit. It's just selfish, and I've been guilty of this type of neglect as well. Felt like I was dating a fucked up, expensive chemical instead of a woman. There's nothing more emasculating really.
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He has subx, I would never narcan if I wasnt 100% convinced it was o.d. I've been seriously scared that it was and he's eventually come to...that's why I ask how to tell the differencend. At this point I need to make sure I live..
 
How do you know for sure?

I could hide it pretty well. I take pain medication and there are times when I am tired and it makes me know a lil bit.

You would never know I took any pain medication if I did not tell you.
 
dopemaster said:
How do you know for sure?

I could hide it pretty well. I take pain medication and there are times when I am tired and it makes me know a lil bit.

You would never know I took any pain medication if I did not tell you.
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We met 20 yrs ago. Didn't reconnect until February and he was in prison on a when release program, about to be fine. He wasn't using. But he broke his hand in July and got street pain meds from a friend and it got bad quick. Then the guy didn't have any roxy so he legit kept offering heroin until finally he took it. Immediately started with a needle. Did that for a few weeks, I knew something was wrong...broke up with him, then he cane clean and said he wanted to quit so I told him I'll stay if youre quitting and we can when it together, but imy not staying if you keep using. Told him we can wean him down with percs week by week. The first few days her took subx. Then he stopped taperin at some point and was using roxy again. But denying it to me. I've always said, just be truthful with what you're using and how much, so we can work on it. I love him. But this is not him. This is a different person. I KNOW him.
 
I wish I could edit on mobile.... he was on a work release program about to be done ***
dopemaster said:
How do you know for sure?

I could hide it pretty well. I take pain medication and there are times when I am tired and it makes me know a lil bit.

You would never know I took any pain medication if I did not tell you.
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You knew him when he was in prison, clean by force, and desperate for a woman. Don't lie to yourself for starters.

Look my best friend is in prison, he met a woman thru another inmates gf, he will get out do well probably marry her and use drugs again, that is his pattern.

You never really know anyone. If I was in prison, I would be clean cuz I wouldn't want to purchase drugs in there because of risk of increased charges, disease, and having problems with my fellow inmates.

Pain can make anyone go back on pain medication. He might just not take it as rx'd or maybe he just has a really strong rx. If he is just knodding and has no tracks he isn't doing that bad as compared to IV drug use.

Talk to him if you want answers. You need to get him to talk to you but not be too confrontational or blaming cuz if he is in pain he will be very frustrated. Opiate wd is hell and some people just can't do it. Some people just can't do life without pain medicine and/or opiates.

If he is in pain he should go to a good doctor and follow the doctors advice. Pain medication will make you knod, especially if your tolerance is low (ie being in prison for a while and therefor abstaining). Good luck.
 
dopemaster said:
He needs to get his use under control to where he is functional. If you marry an addict all you can really ask is that they stay functional. You can't get in a relationship hoping to change someone much.
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there is a difference from i am on opiates doing my daily business shit to i'm nodding off at the wheel

that means he's taking shitloads. many people drink but only some vomit in street and stagger about like fools. do you see the distinction?

for a long time in the long ago past i had a poppy tea addiction which i tapered because i wanted to get off it. it gets boring after a while. i would get very relaxed but never to the point of falling asleep. i was very functional yet completely high. the beauty of opiates is that they are so effective at doses that are functional- in certain activities and at moderates doses they can make u much better at shit (singing, dancing among others). so what he's doing is excessive and dangerous and very selfish

he's as bad as a drink driver- he could kill you not just himself. how is that love and protect. dang
 
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