Hello from Herne Bay - The Home of Despair

[The Lord Daw]

Hi Everyone,

I'm the Lord Daw and I am thanks to the Medical Professional a full time Opiate Conisseur, I'm currently shovelling Zomorph, Dihydrocodiene, Amytriptiline and Gabapentin, amognst other illegal lovelieness, down my throat. I also like a bottle of cognac or ten and Motorcycles and the wonderfull life that comes with it. The reason I'm on all the Pills is that I'm diabetic and my Legs are in a terrible state with Neuropathy, Lymphodema & Ulcers as well as bits chopped off!!!

Darren C

 

[Bearlove]

Welcome to the site,

That is one hell of a combination of pills and sorry to hear about the complications your having with your diabetes / legs. We have a few sections that may interest you - Other drugs or even the pain management section over in Healthy Living .

Herne Bay looks like a nice place - lovely sea front (especially after a bottle of cognac)

I forgot to add that we have a European chat section that you can find here or if you fancy a more varied 'social' section click here

 

[Batmam]

Hi there
I'm new and I can't find how to start my own thread so I thought I'd be cheeky and piggy back this one
Just wondering wtf I'm going to do ... I started taking dhc about 10 years ago for endimetriosis and chronic pelvic pain... And found that I liked them... a lot !!
I'm currently getting my script of 56 weekly as well as getting a friends and my partners and now I've just come across how to buy them online :.. I'm currently taking upwards of 40/50 a day and when I'm running low I will do ER visits , basically anything to get my hands on them... And they don't get me high anymore just need them to feel "normal"
I've even resulted to trying to make poppy pod tea to starve off the wd.... I feel like I'm sinking and I need someone to tell me what the fuck to do ...I have 2 kids and a business and I cannot go cold turkey I can't get off the sofa when I have non ... I don't know whether this is the right place to write but I just need someone to talk to about it .... I'm hiding how bad it is quite well at the minute but I can't take the expense it's costing to feed my habit just so I feel normal ... Any replies will be greatly appreciated xx

 

[The Lord Daw]

Fucking Opiates!!!

Hi there
I'm new and I can't find how to start my own thread so I thought I'd be cheeky and piggy back this one
Just wondering wtf I'm going to do ... I started taking dhc about 10 years ago for endimetriosis and chronic pelvic pain... And found that I liked them... a lot !!
I'm currently getting my script of 56 weekly as well as getting a friends and my partners and now I've just come across how to buy them online :.. I'm currently taking upwards of 40/50 a day and when I'm running low I will do ER visits , basically anything to get my hands on them... And they don't get me high anymore just need them to feel "normal"
I've even resulted to trying to make poppy pod tea to starve off the wd.... I feel like I'm sinking and I need someone to tell me what the fuck to do ...I have 2 kids and a business and I cannot go cold turkey I can't get off the sofa when I have non ... I don't know whether this is the right place to write but I just need someone to talk to about it .... I'm hiding how bad it is quite well at the minute but I can't take the expense it's costing to feed my habit just so I feel normal ... Any replies will be greatly appreciated xx

Oohh, I know that one, mind you I never got this bad, when you say you're taking 40-50 tbs a day, are they the 30mg dhc's? Also where do you live as different countries have different rules/laws over what you can buy at chemists and what needs a dr's prescription. There's no magic solution I'm afraid and I DO know what going through as I have to take dhc as well, been on it since 1991. I manage to keep it to 120mg 4 to 5 times a day but I don't get any buzz off of them anymore, when you think what just 1 or 2 tbs did when you first started on them. The same with the Morphine, I can take 180mg+ and only get a slight fluffy tummy, if you know what I mean

If you can go cold turkey it's prob the best route and yes I know it's a terrifying prospect. Talk to your GP, he/she deals with this problem a lot and they will NOT stop your meds or reduce them unless you are 100% happy, no need to worry about that and it takes a lot of guts to admit this to anybody face to face esp Dr's &c. If you do decide to try then they may give you diazepam or temazepam to help with the 'horrors', but try not to take em as you'll prob like them a bit too much, they are yummy!

Good luck and keep us/me posted, you're not alone with this shit OK

 

[The Lord Daw]

Welcome to the site,

That is one hell of a combination of pills and sorry to hear about the complications your having with your diabetes / legs. We have a few sections that may interest you - Other drugs or even the pain management section over in Healthy Living .

Herne Bay looks like a nice place - lovely sea front (especially after a bottle of cognac)

I forgot to add that we have a European chat section that you can find here or if you fancy a more varied 'social' section click here

Looks even lovelier if you mix the Cognac with the Zomorph, Herne Bay in England is nothing like Herne Bay in Aukland NZ btw lol

 

[Batmam]

Oh my god thank you so much for replying to me after I hijacked your thread
Yes it's the 30mg dhc got my script this morning and took 30 to get me out of that can't be arsed place ... Yanno the one were you want the world to just fuck off and leave you alone ?! So took them ... Half hour later I was up and hoovering and making the beds and back to normality .... No buzz no nowt just able to function and get shit done .... I have also been to buy a coffee grinder as I have lots of pods and After reading I've seen that if you grind them into a powder and make a tea apparently it could help me get off the dhc which I need off them... I don't think anyone really understands unless they've been there I'm not doing it to get off my tits I'm doing it so I can take my kids to school and make the tea and do the dishes ... I'm doing it so can actually feel like everyone else does naturally ....
I am considering going to the doctors and just being honest with them ... The thing is I still am waiting for a hysterectomy and I do still have pain ... However that's not the reason I take these now it is purely so I'm not a shivering shaking mess ....when I've had to go through wd for a few days I couldn't even bring myself to get a shower ... I mean how disgusting is that ... Just laying stinking and not giving a shit !! That's fucked up !!
I'm a 34 year old woman and I'm really living a big lie and a daily nightmare .... No enjoyment whatsoever .... I'm grinding poppy pods for fuck sake , I just do not know how I got here ....

Thank you so much for replying ... You have no idea what it means to me that someone actually gives a shit so thank you

I live in England .... I've been on these for forever now ... I've been prescribed fentanyl patches but nothing has compared to dhc for me ....I don't get no buzz or anything anymore at all... And yes I remember what 2 used to do to me ... Why dya think I've ended up taking this many ... I was always chasing and never got there ....
Hope your ok, your not alone too?Xx

 

[The Lord Daw]

900mg of dhc is approx equivalent to 225mg of Morphine when it's been metabolised by your liver, which is a fair bit, how do you get so many as the Nazis at the Doctors, the receptionists, are usually quite anal about issuing lots of pain meds early, I used to go around all the chemists in the area buying otc co-codamol tbs & Neurofen + tbs and extracting the codine from them which then only gives you 256mg of codine per box of 32!!! I dunno what to suggest as I'm exactly the same as you but not as bad. It must cost a fortune buying the online stuff as the cost per unit is scandalous. I tried fentanyl patches a couple of times but they just got me really nauseated and a bit stoned.

 

[Batmam]

Yeah I have started to notice it affect my bank balance ... It's mental as I'm usually quite ... Well not tight but I just don't like and won't be ripped off ... But I don't seem to have an issue with paying 100's every week...
Yeah the receptionist bloody hate me in the doctors ... My friend has started to get me them as well and my partner gets 100 every month and I get his too... However I still need To buy online ... There's one site that's not as expensive as the others and let's you buy 200 every 25 days ... I don't think I'm allowed to write names and prices on here so I won't ....I think I'm going to get these ones tmw and start my taper ....I just don't want to get ill... I have 2 kids I can't afford to be ill...me and kids dad don't live together anymore so it's not like I have someone here that can help me when I go through wd....I kno I must sound like a terrible mother but I really arnt .... My kids want for nothing and I do everything for them ... They don't even get their own drinks and stuff I mean I literally run around after them like their maid ... So please don't think it makes a bad mother as my kids know nothing ... And I'm always running around sorting their play dates and sleepovers and well everything so they have it good ... My house isn't suffering or anything like that ... It's clean and tidy and fridge is always full for them ... I can't stress enough how good they have it , I'm the one silently struggling ...I took 30 this morning and haven't taken anymore since ... I'm hoping not to today as I don't feel like I need them ... Like I say I'm not taking them for the buzz ( I wish!!)
They still give me energy tho... Which is why I liked them in the first place ... No buzz but energy to do things dya know what I mean ??
I've been looking for products that may help but apparently most of the good ones have disappeared and been banned .... Funny isn't it they ban things that help people ... It's like the government wants to keep you likethis ... Everything I see that helps with opiate addiction and withdrawal seems to have been banned from selling.... Unless it's by the government ... They'll gladly prescribe methadone but not natural herbs ... It's just nuts ...like they'd rather you die than get high ... It's fucking nuts

So how u feeling today ??
You coping ??
Anything new ?? How's your legs ?? xx

 

[Inpu]

Hey Batmam,

To fight WD:
Buy Loperamide in pills(not capsules or liquid) in your local pharmacy or superstore. Sold OTC everywhere in USA, I assume available in UK as well with no RX.
Buy grapefruit juice, preferably white grapefruit.
Drink a cup of GJ then pop 40mg of Loperamide that's 20 2mg pills.
Chase with 3 more cups of GJ to aprox total of 1 liter.
Wait 3-4hrs, poor oral B/V of Lops takes it time to work.
If in 5hrs ur WD are not gone take 30mg-15 more pills same way.
I have no experience with dihydrocodeine to define it's opioid strength but strongly believe is weaker than 1.5g of dope IV a day, so 40mg should help u.
Take Lops only when ur in WD and allow at least 24hrs b4 re-dosing(better 36hrs).
It will get you constipated for 36-48hrs so use laxative.
Please, do your own research on Lops and use common sense when taking it.

To fight for your health and life:

Pill that you take has acetaminophen which does way greater damage to ur health than any opioid existing.
Please, check your liver cause that organ is effected most and ask ur doctor to switch u to a different painkiller that has no acetaminophen.
"I am considering going to the doctors and just being honest with them"-that's the best thing u can do: be honest! But not with just the doctors but most importantly ur family, people that u love and that love u. U think ur problem is taking to many DHC pills and fighting WD in between scripts. No, ur problem is full blown opioid addiction! I'm only 38 days clean cold turkey after 10+ years of the disease we both share and just believe me it can not be healed on one's own or just with the doctors help. U scared of WD now, not realizing that u will need the uttermost social support when the PAWs hit.

Hope my advice could be helpful.

 

[Batmam]

Hi there

Firstly thank you so much for taking the time out of your day to help me , someone you don't know ... Thank you !!
Secondly WELL DONE you!!! Wow 38 days ... That is amazing so well done , I know how hard that must of been / and still is and I just think your a superstar for doing it ? Well done .

Back to your message you said about my pills having paracetamol ( that's what we call it in England) they do not .... Mine are solely dihydrocodiene no paracetamol... I have kids and I know This is going to sound fkin nuts because of the whole reason I'm on here .... But I'm "not " naive or stupid and know that taking that much paracetamol would kill me or leave me like a cabbage and I wouldn't do it... and as for me thinking it's just me taking too many pills .... I know I'm a total opioid addict ... I know that ...this has all happened over years and years of me taking an extra couple then an extra 10...15 ... The fact that I'm stood in my kitchen making poppy pod tea to starv off the withdrawals tells me my problem is more than pills , I'm a realist and know my problem , I've been reading so many stories about people and their problems with opiates ... And before I used to think well at least I'm not that bad .... But I am !! I am that bad !! I'm worse I know I'm not on smack and trust me when I say I never would go there , I can't stress enough what my kids mean to me ... I'm a good mother and would never go out to go on heroine ... I just would not do that ... Or methadone or subs....I will get off these tablets ...im not looking to feel high I'm looking to Feel normal ... Human.... Just want to be normal!! ....I'm still just as bad as a heroine addict because it's all I think about from the second I wake up on a morning to me going to sleep at night ....I panic when I only have enough to last me the next day ... And I do everything I can to get them .... I know my addiction is destroying my life I understand it's totally out of control.... I don't have any family I can talk to about this I really don't, and I've just separated from the kids dad , we remain friendly but I can't tell him this I just can't , he can be very vindictive and cruel and he would use it against me .
I have one friend I feel ok with telling as she gets me her script ..... But that's it.

I get 200 delivered tmw and I'm going to try and make them last the week , .....I will defo buy that loperamide tmw and grapefruit juice ....what does it actually do ?? Just stop the shakes and cramping and bad feelings ?? I say "just" as if it's some small thing I don't mean it like that I'm just asking what taking this will do for me ?..... Will it speed up my wd? I'm asking because I really do want to kick this shit life to the curb and will do anything someone who has been here advises ( within reason )
Can you explain exactly what to expect with taking it as you have directed please .... And thanks again ... Proper spot on human being for taking time out of your day to help someone like me .... I can tell you've walked in my shoes and I'm so glad to know you've come out the otheside xxx
Respect mate xx

 

[Inpu]

Wow, wow, wow… U know that from ur words: "I know I'm a total opioid addict" and down 2 paragraphs…That's exactly what i used to feel and tell myself…for years. And same way wake up every last fcking morning with the only thought on my mind. But believe me, being 38 days sober i'm not gone much farther then where u at right now cause the problem is much deeper and complex. I'm same way newbie to that forum and it's probably impolite to use somebody's thread for our conversation. If u ok it we can exchange PMs.
And many thanks to u as well, ur helping me a lot in a way that's hard to explain right now.

 

[Batmam]

Hey you ?

Defo do PMs ... I know your right about hijacking someone's thread .. Bit shit but I honestly didn't know what else to do as I needed to speak out to someone yet didn't know how to.... I suppose anyone who is on here knows how when your ready to speak and seek help you just need to do it there and then and I didn't have any clue on how to do it so I just piggy backed and I apologise but honestly so glad I did because I feel like I'm actually going to get somewhere now and if being a little cheeky once in my life is going to help rid me of this life ....fuck it I'll be little cheeky THANK YOU LORD DAW!!!!!
Do you mean PMs on this site or like emails or txts ?? I really have no idea how to do PMs on here, but I will look now and send you one if I can... Unless emailing is better for you??

Well I have been sat looking out the window all morning waiting for my parcel like a kid waiting for Santa ....they've just been .... What's shit is I'm sat looking at a box of 200 worrying about when they run out ... I've got 200 and I'm panicking at not being able to get anymore for a week .... Even when I've got them here I'm not happy Coz I know I have to use sparingly if I want to not be ill and 200 should last a month!!... This needs to stop ... Way I feel right now is like putting the full lot down the toilet and just jumping off....but I won't because I will only end up trying to source more later on today at a further expense been there done it bought the T shirt ...
How are you feeling today hope your feeling strong.. I read your thread about how long H wd is supposed to last and I commented not that I know anything about H thank god but just a moral boost as I think your awesome and so strong and you sound so determined to kick this shit out your life and I don't know you but I'm "proud" of you Without sounding like a total Condescending sleazy weirdo ?.. I just know how hard it must of been and how fed up you must of been to finally have had enough of the devil on your back everyday to find he strength to shake him off ...
With going through what your going through and still giving me your time on that first message you sent on how to help me with WD when you were going through hell yourself you stopped to pick me up... Really really cool of you to do that ... Some decent people in this world after all eh so strange tho to me because from being a child I was always warned about addicts and how "bad" they were as people ... How they arnt people you would want to speak to how they only care about themselves and how you can't trust them ( us) I look back now and it's just ignorance , fear , and a lack or want of understanding .. People don't want to understand we are just "bad people " in their eyes ...that's why I hide it like I do because living with that stigma and letting everybody down and having them think so badly of me absolutely kills me .. I'm a pleaser I'm known as the happy funny pretty girl who is always smiling and always helpful and polite and will do anything for anyone .. I'm known for always being happy and having a spotless home and well mannered children and for being a business woman .. and for helping out on the children's school trips and throwing the best birthday , Halloween , and Christmas parties for the kids how am I supposed to tell people that really I'm a drug addict a " bad person" how the fuck can I do that ?? So I don't have anyone I can talk like this to so thank you so much for being my person I will be yours any time you need someone ...
You are really lifting my spirits and I know That just talking to you about it and being honest about myself ( which I have never been to anyone) has helped me so much already , even though I've told you my deepest darkest secret you still want to speak to me which is what has been a massive worry of mine for so long now ... That if anybody knew about my habit they would judge me and think I was a bad person and a bad mother and want nothing to do with me ... You have honestly made me feel like I'm not a terrible person I just have a disease I didn't wake up one morning thinking I'm gonna get addicted to my pain meds ... Just happened ... I knew I liked them too much I knew other people took their painkillers differently to how I took mine ... And I knew I was taking more than I should and not just for pain....but I didn't see how deep and dark the hole I was digging for myself was getting or going to be ... Now I'm in it and can't seem to climb out ...I don't know you but the fact that you wanted to help me even though you didn't know me means more to me than if I'd known you for years .... Your giving me hope and I'm so grateful to you I really am .... Let me know what type of messages you want to do and I am honestly happy to speak anyway that's good for you hope your ok

Stay strong ?X

 

[The Lord Daw]

I aint got a problem, if you want to use this thread, do so by all means

 

[Batmam]

Aww bless you
Thank you ... Hope your ok , thanks for all your help the other day ... Much appreciated !! Here if you ever need the same ...
From
The cheeky one !! ?

 

[KittyPaws]

Hey Batmam, I'm new here too, and I live very close to you actually..Kent! I'm too using DHC, no one at all knows about it, not my friends or family. It's hard because I'm a registered health professional so part of me is 'ashamed' for finding comfort in this drug. I really feel for you, and I'd be happy to talk to you whenever xx

 

[The Lord Daw]

Hey Batmam, I'm new here too, and I live very close to you actually..Kent! I'm too using DHC, no one at all knows about it, not my friends or family. It's hard because I'm a registered health professional so part of me is 'ashamed' for finding comfort in this drug. I really feel for you, and I'd be happy to talk to you whenever xx

I'm in Kent as well, what's going on? Are we all on Opies down here? pmsl!!!