TDS Masturbating on speed

Hm I can agree with this but for me it was definitely a choice. I have my reasons but can't say I always want someone else.



This is HUGE! Even if I've smoked hours before, if I meet a hot enough guy, I am ready to go.


With long term porn use we constantly need to get more graphic and hard core...

Another reason why I don't hookup a lot now though. Partner has to be really hot or into some... interesting things lol

The last quote (bold) was not from me :! . I do not really agree, my porn taste did not change my whole life and never will. I'm old-school and boring in that regard. The 90s were the golden age of porn imho. If I ever intend to go on a sex tourism trip it will most probably be Italy. ;) Masturbation is probably just anticipation for that trip.

When it comes to developing sexual relationships I realized that I prefer to have one (or max. two, not together unfortunately :o) middle/long-term partner instead of many one night stands. Too much hazzle. This fuck-friend stuff also does not work for me, because those fuck-friends usually have real partners, that they cheat on, and I fear a karmatic backlash because of that. Plus I do not give much of a fornicate about being underfornicated atm. There are more important issues than fornication (I guess).
 
The last quote was not from me :! .

I'm VERY sorry, the reply box is so small and I was going too quick with the copy/paste.

When it comes to developing sexual relationships I realized that I prefer to have one

I agree, sex gets better (for me at least) when you know the person, and I actually have a long-term (sex only) partner who understands that sex is more than just about himself.

-A remorseful greenlighter :(
 
When I use emoticons, it is always meant as a joke. :D Even otherwise nothing is meant offensively (unless it helps anyone more, if it was meant offensively). Sometimes intentions are lost in translation. Ok, I do not want to sodomize up this thread any further.

Edit : What does longterm sex-only partner mean ? That will imho only work as long one of you does not meet some "more-than-sex-only"-partner. That would again be too much hazzle for me. =D
 
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you don't. that's the whole point. it makes you so horny that you can jack off for hours without getting hard.
 
I know it may seem to be taking forever but be patient and keep doing what you are doing now. What about emotional intimacy? Do you have that in your life but still lack a sex drive?

Its a complicated situation. I experienced a massive heart awakening after doing iboga, and this feeling of love was coming and going for a good year. Then 3 months ago I did a few ayahuasca ceremonies and the exact opposite happened, my heart got completely blocked and that was the start of my current struggles. When I was feeling the love I was functioning better than I did on speed. Things in life aren't what they seem, its a spiritual reality and everything is energy. I wish I had realised this, I wouldn't have depleted my life force by masturbating on speed for years. I was taking all kinds of other substances to counteract the side effects of the speed (like GHB or benzos for sleep) and its like my brain chemistry changed, so now speed agitates me unless I take some benzos with it. I'm pretty sure its the masturbation that caused my heart to get blocked and emotions to disappear. Emotions are energy in motion.

So now I'm at the point where I need to choose what to do. I can either stay off substances and pray my ability to function comes back, or I can get back on dexedrine. The catch with getting back on dexedrine is I need to be on benzos alongside it. The idea is that maybe I can get another 10 or 20 years of living on substances, and not worry about what happens then because thats a long way away.

Also when I say I masturbated 12 hours in a day, it really woulda been more like 4 hours, and the other 8 hours would have been spent compulsively browsing porn sites and adding to my porn collection. It reassures me knowing that its common because I'm really hoping my theory that I depleted my life force is incorrect. Also, if this was possible, I'd imagine male pornstars would be in serious trouble.
 
What do you mean by that ? You cannot get aroused by porn or you do not experience physical symptoms if you are flirting with a person of the sex of your choice ? There is a huge difference. Masturbating to porn vs. sexual magnetism with a person is related like watching football in TV vs. playing it yourself. Masturbating on speed a lot is a sign of being underfornicated. I can totally relate but 5 years (non stop? =D), that is a lot.

Apart from that I recommend taking Rhodiola Rosea. It is rumored to stabilize the adrenergic/dopaminergic balance.

Yeah literally have no arousal or desire at all. If I tried to masturbate or have sex now, it would be a challenge. Yeah the only breaks I had during those 5 years was when I ran out of speed and would have to wait a week or so before restocking. Looking back on it. This happened at such a bad time in my life because I met a girl who I fell in love with, and she fell in love with me, and I need to be well for her sake, I can't drag her down with me.

Googling this, I see its a lot more common than I thought. Maybe I was being too hard on myself, I was thinking it was selfish to waste that time masturbating, when I could have used all that time and energy to help people. I regret not using that time and energy to do good things.
 
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I spent about 5 years on speed, and during those 5 years I spent half my time studying for college, and the other half masturbating. I would stay up 36 hours, and sometimes I could spend 12 hours straight masturbating without realising the time went by. Now I feel like I lost all of my life force, my sex drive, emotions and energy is gone. Is there anyone else here who has possibly 1000 hours spent way too long masturbating on speed? If so, are you suffering from long term consequences?
I only used speed a bunch for about a month, and yeah, I jacked off for a good 8 hours whenever I had a chance , finally had to pry myself away from the shitty porn mag. Sex definitely is less interesting to me now, unless its the first time w/ a new partner, or maybe I just haven't met the right freak b**** yet :) Still, I never wanna tweak ever again.
 
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