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Mental Health Cut from benzos cold turkey - will I survive withdrawal?

G

GimmeMore

Greenlighter
Joined
May 12, 2016
Messages
1
Hey Everyone -

I've been reading these threads for years but did not register until today .

I am a recovering alcoholic and poly-drug abuser .

Basically, I am uncomfortable with sobriety and will garbage can anything that is mind altering.

Lately, my psychiatrist terminated me for "Doctor shopping."

I was getting a high dose of benzos and stimulants from my primary care doctor and shrink .

I also developed tolerance withdrawal and out of desperation called scripts for more benzos as a prescriber .

So far, I believe I got away with calling in the controlled substances and will never attempt to do something so risky again and go to prison .

But I lost my doctors and met with a new psychiatrist today .

I told her about my benzo and stim use and the truth about my addiction to alcohol and dependency on drugs .

I was hoping she would prescribe Valium and help me taper off but she said she will not write a script for any addictive medications .

I have a giant load of gaba pentin and a new script for Wellbutrin 150 .

I also got some tinctures from the store that have valerian , melatonin and skull cap in them.

I have been in withdrawal plenty of times before and never suffered a seizure .

I have never stayed clean from drugs or alcohol for more than a month .

My question is - as someone who's been dependent on benzos and stimulants - do you think her prescribing just these medications (gaba and Wellbutrin ) will be enough ?

She left her prescription pad lying on the table and I impulsively wanted to take it .

I didn't . I am scared and have real ADD , anxiety and insomnia .

My grandmother also keeps her medication open and has every opiate on the market .

A couple months ago , I ate a fentanyl patch and would have stopped breathing and OD'ed if I had not abused amphetamines that day .

My life revolves around drugs that will bring me up and down and knock me out.

I am a severely depressed person sober . I have been to the psych ward , jail for DUIs, detox centers , rehabs and regularly attended AA meetings .

I am treatment resistant for depression and drugs are the only reason why I have not committed suicide .

Now without my scripts , I don't know what to do .

I have used lots of KRATOM but did not feel any euphoria or high .

My tolerance is extremely high and if you have read this much , thanks , i know that there isn't a magical cure for addiction but wonder if anyone knows a safe plan that will go well with my chemical dependency .

Sorry if I am posting in wrong place or broke a rule .


I am grateful for all the trip reports that have helped me through some tough times before .

I love all of you guys .


-Gimme
 
How long were you taking the benzos and was it every day? Shit like that pisses me off because it's dangerous to be cut cold turkey if you've been taking them for a while. Doctors of all people should know this but I think some actually do it to punish whom they see as drug addicts.
 
It is very dangerous to cut someone off off Benzos if they are physically dependent on them. If you have been on a high dose over a long period of time you have to be tapered off slowly with Valium preferably as it is a very long lasting benzo and it's easy to adjust the dose. Did you mention to the shrink that you actually know doctors are not supposed to do that? I find that the mention of lawyers and lawsuits and such generally brings them around ;) . What quack would take someone off high dose benzos and put them on 150mg's of Wellbutrin which is contradicted in anyone undergoing Benzodiazepine or any other Gaba drug such as Alcohol or Barbiturates due to the fact that it lowers the seizure threshold and leave them with nothing but Gabapentin which is a very weak anti-convulsant to begin with is beyond me. You don't need to add a stimulating anti-depressant that can increase the risk of seizure to benzo withdrawal that's for sure. Gabapentin may help Benzo wd a little bit but it is not going to stop most of the symptoms or even close or prevent the risk of seizure so really this is fucking insane. No sane shrink would recommend anyone go off a Benzo cold turkey. Some still do a fast taper with Phenobarbital but really there is no need for this when a Valium taper works fine for most people.

How long have you been taking benzos and which ones and at what dose?
 
If she won't assist with a taper than have her script you Depakote and Indural. Neither are habit forming. Depakote is an anti siezure medication, and Indural (propranolol) is a beta blocker that will help blood pressure and anxiety. I was cut off from my benzo prescription cold turkey in 2010 in rehab, and was only given Depakote. It was hell for a couple of years but I survived, and am actually glad to be off them now, though would have preferred a taper. The gabapenton should help with the withdrawal process, just tt not to abuse it and build a high tolerance to quickly (it happens, and it happens fast). In the meantime try to find a doctor that will do a taper. Mention that you are seeing a new one who just cut you off cold turkey. Good luck!
 
DO NOT TAKE THE WELLBUTRIN (bupropion) during benzo withdrawal.

It lowers the seizure threshold and here in the UK we no longer use it for smoking cessation because it can cause seizures in people with no other risk factors. Given that you're at risk for seizures during benzo WD I wouldnt touch it till well after you're clear of the benzo wd
 
@nuttynutskin. You are so right about doctors punishing addicts. I thought the hippocratic oath was to do no harm, not be vindictive and spiteful.
[MENTION=407966]GimmeMore[/MENTION]: How are you holding up? If your doctor won't prescribe meds to you find another doctor because it is dangerous to quit cold turkey.
 
davestate said:
DO NOT TAKE THE WELLBUTRIN (bupropion) during benzo withdrawal.

It lowers the seizure threshold
Click to expand...

I totally forgot that it's been so long since I tried wellbutrin. That makes the new doctor seem even more incompetent if that were possible. Cut off benzos, prescribe medication that lowers seizure threshold... :|
 
nuttynutskin said:
I totally forgot that it's been so long since I tried wellbutrin. That makes the new doctor seem even more incompetent if that were possible. Cut off benzos, prescribe medication that lowers seizure threshold... :|
Click to expand...
Yes - this. You need to find a different doctor. Wellbutrin is the last thing you need right now, and for a while depending on how long you took benzos.
 
Moreaux said:
Yes - this. You need to find a different doctor. Wellbutrin is the last thing you need right now, and for a while depending on how long you took benzos.
Click to expand...

This essentially. I am sometimes prescribed Bupropion for Bipolar Depression and as i take Clonazepam (and have for a good 10 years) i am rather careful not to miss a dose when i am taking it. I can be pretty sloppy on getting refills and will often leave it for a day or so if i run out because it takes a good 2 days before i experience any withdrawal symptoms. But with Bupropion every doctor told me not to miss any doses of my Clonazepam, Lamotrigine or when i was on it Gabapentin. In someone not on anti-seizure meds like Benzos or Gabapentin or whatever the seizure risk in not that high (about the same as SSRI's until you get over 300mg's a day) but for anyone on these or any other anti-convulsants you should take your dose on time everyday religiously.
 
I got on Wellbutrin to quit smoking a year after I quit benzos. I had a low siezure threshold prior to using any drugs, had a few grand mals and several partials as a kid and teen, and benzos lowered that threshold even more. When I got on Wellbutrin I was no longer on siezure meds, and I started getting them again. I would wait a long time before trying Wellbutrin.
 
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Moreaux said:
I got on Wellbutrin to quit smoking a year after I quit benzos. I had a low siezure threshold prior to using any drugs, had a few grand meals and several partials as a kid and teen, and benzos lowered that threshold even more. When I got on Wellbutrin I was no longer on siezure meds, and I started getting them again. I would wait a long time before trying Wellbutrin.
Click to expand...

Yeah if you are susceptible to seizures at all going on Bupropion is probably not a good idea. I seem to have a high seizure threshold as i basically went cold turkey once off 6mg's of Clonazepam when i was in another city and the doc wouldn't refill my script despite a letter from my shrink and GP with contact numbers on them. I had to make 10 2mg pills last me nearly 2 weeks and although i was already going through Opiate withdrawal and had Pneumonia that was at the time undiagnosed i had nothing resembling a seizure. I was on Lamotrigine at the time so i guess that helped.
 
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Wow your condition sounds tough. If it's as bad with depression / anxiety as you say then you must fight for your survival, find adoc who'll put you on maintenance benzos and maybe has you try out atypical anti ds. Total sobriety may be the wrong thing for you.

Or not. Sometimes people just need a radical change on their lives, a clean break. Flights are so cheap right now, if you could afford any sort of illicit habit you can save up a grand, spend 500 to fly to ecuador or the Philippines, just any place really different, and go backpacking for a month or two. I promise it'll be an unforgettable experience, and planning for it would keep you busy during WD. At least that's my experience, i love seeing new places!

Here's how much some Flights are (just checked for october from LAX): quito, ecuador 600, Philippines new guinea vanuatu etc 700, nicaragua (beautiful place, been there for the volcanos) 450, beijjng 780, moscow 650 (don't go unless you love bureaucracy, shitty weather and alcoholic, depressed ppl;-), turkey 800. I would go to a poorer country, not only do they need your money more but the people are usually friendlier. Personally I'm looking into either China or the Philippines for my own little travel adventure in October.
 
This annoys me so much, drs cutting people off cold turkey; ESPECIALLY benzos or alcohol omg. I would try and find another dr who knows the dangers of Benzo withdrawl and do a proper taper.

I agree also re not taking the bupropion during benzo withdrawal. Gabapentin yes. Wellbutrin (here prescribed as zyban) sent me psychotic during the first ten days but it was ok agter that. I was prescribed it during my benzo taper (which has now been going for nearly 3 years) but only when I was down to a low dose (20mg) which is where I have stayed for many months. My dr knows im not in the place to go any lower (im also on 32mg subs, just dropped to 30) at this staye even though he absolutely HATES benzos and won't prescibe them EXCEPT for tapering purposes.

If you feel like you are in danger of having a seizure, seek help straight away and I personally would be seeking another dr asap who will put you on a proper taper. Best of luck, it's a shame so many drs don't understand/recognise/care about the dangers of benzo withdrawal and I hope you find one that does, I found a couple and it's the only reason im here today.
 
Gimmemore are you ok? I am doing a Valium taper, but had a few slip ups - I can't believe your new shrink did you like that. Is there any chance you could go back to your primary? That's what I had to do - addiction is in my medical history with him, but I got lucky or maybe unlucky and he conveniently forgot. So I had to come clean with him and my psych and I'm on this taper. I hardly ever post on here, but I was UTFSE to look up info on slip ups and came across your post. We have a lot in common - calling in your own scripts is pretty ballsy, but I've done some crazy shit too. I was just moved to comment - I don't have any medical advice for you, but if you keep searching on here you're bound to come up with some type of help. If you live in the US some states have drug and alcohol problems through public welfare - might be worth a try.
 
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Even with history of addiction, no dr should ever cut someone cold Turkey from benzos! My first higher dose prescription was given to me by a dr who i told I was taking several hundreds of mg of valium a day or same or Xanax/loraz/temaz while I was waiting to get into detox (I think I was prescribed 80mg a day which was a lot lower than what I was taking but enough for me to be safe and ok ... And my very long taper was done by my addictions sciences dr who does my SUBOXONE and has all my addiction history going back 20 years plus. Addictjon or not, everyone should have the right to be safe :(.

I hope you find a better dr fast! Are you okB
 
Cutting someone off Benzos cold turkey is inhumane and basically a form of torture imo. I told my doctor that the quack shrink at the pen here that i like to call Dr.Mengele cuts everyone off all their psych meds cold turkey even Benzos and he literally couldn't believe that any doctor that would do that is still allowed to practice medicine. There is no medical reason to do that and if the patient has been on moderate to high doses of Benzo for a long time it could very well be life threatening or atleast induce a few grand mal seizures. I am currently tapering down my Clonazepam and my doctor won't do it any faster then .25mg's every 3 months as he said he's seen first hand what a fast benzo taper can do. Even though i have dropped my Clonazepam pretty fast in the past without any serious problems he won't put me on a taper any faster then that as he's afraid it could trigger Mania (i have Bipolar disorder), suicidal idealization or a grand mal seizure and he doesn't want the medical board or a lawyer knocking on his door due to a improper taper. Many doctors also put their patients on Divalproex (Depakote, Epival, etc) during a taper to lower the risk of a seizure happening.

No doctor with a clue would send someone on their way without atleast Librium. Obviously they are letting personal bias get in the way of medical treatment and i have also sadly encountered these types of doctors. You really can't get anywhere with them as like Religious zealots they can't be argued with and their position will not budge.
 
It's very scary how many times you hear that people have been cut off benzos, seriously scary. I feel very lucky to have found my dr who hates Benzos and will only prescibe them TO people who are additicted and for taper purposes. He brought me down from the ridiculous levels fast enough but has allowed me to stay on a low dose for several months now (3 year taper) as much as he hates them; he knows im not ready to do the hard yards of the end of the detox at the moment.
 
I wish doctors were more empathetic and mindful regarding benzos. When I went to rehab in 2010 I was cut off cold turkey from Xanax, which I had taken for 10 years. It took years to recover from, and I think I suffered damage from the siezures I had in early recovery. Benzos have been around and abused for decades, I don't understand how there isn't a mandatory protocol dicots have to follow in getting patients off of them. I think doctors should be held liable if their patient commits suicide if they've been cut off - I bet if they were liable more doctors would go along with a taper.
 
If you don't have any benzos at all and start going through horrible withdrawals, please go to the ER. I heard they will give you some benzos. Just don't go cold turkey. It's very dangerous. Don't suffer through withdrawals cold turkey and face possible seizures or worst.
 
Gimmemore, how are things going? I hope you've found a decent dr, pleaee drop us a quick line to let us know how you are, seems like there several of us who are concerned (and outraged!!) for you. Hope you're as well as can be.
 
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