keeping
Bluelight Crew
chomping my way through 5 or 6 metizolams tonight, nout to right home about but there better than those bloody descho-etzs geeeez
What are the chances of getting a supervised benzo (diaz) script off the dr for a taper, im uk based (northern ire) and in my early 20's? Been on and off rc benzos for 3 years now, longest time off them being about 2 months id say then I slowly slip back into full blown dependency quite sporadically. I have plenty of rc benzos to taper with but every time I get down to around 0.5mg diclaz I start to struggle and end up going on a mini binge taking me weeks to get back to a lower dose, im sick of this seemingly never ending cycle!
I want benzos out of my life for good, they have caused me to isolate myself due to anxiety issues or being to fucked to give a shit about anything including uni work and maintaining healthy relationships. I think having the support of medical professionals behind me id be able to stick to the taper and wouldn't feel as secretive and dodgy as taking rc benzos and keeping it a secret from firends/family.
Whats the worst that could happen? Id be labelled a a druggy with addictive behaviours and risk not being prescribed certain medicines in future incase I abuse them and maybe be turned away completely? Im guessing my Dr hasn't a clue about rc benzos so maybe I should print off some info about them?
Headfuck123 - I'm in the same neck of the woods an did an inpatient that was generally a positive experience. If you need any info just PM and i'll do my best. Best of luck
.....well as it turned out I only took x2 10mg then got on the dog to call every dealer I know (at 12.30am or ther abouts) luckily no one was serving as it would have been a 30 min drive and I was pissed and vallied up so ended up sparko on the settee with dr who on- don't remember a thing about it. Booze is a killer for me it makes me do stooopid tings. I know my limits and never do more than 30mg - nearly always on top of drink but that's from years of practice - that's why I thought about ramping it up to 50mg just to get the buzz I was looking for but figured as fucked as I was if I was doubly fucked I might get in to trouble...cheers for theh reply sprouty
The vendor I sometimes buy stuff from says they should be back in stock within a week or so. They maybe back in now but I haven't checked as a done with rc benzos as they're just too dangerous. Since we're not allowed to name vendors though I don't know how much help that is to you.
I'm off benzos forever now, they are just not good for me at all. That bag that I bought 'by accident when drunk' just caused me problems, just binned the lot.
It was fun, sometimes, but the majority I can't remember while in benzo blackout city. At work and shit, can't remember even talking to clients about jobs, probably garbling nonsense while looking like a spaced out nutcase.
The potency of some of these RC ones and the half lives just fuck someone like me up - as I'll always pop another too soon.
Family wondering what the fuck is wrong with me, as I look 'weird' - nah fuck that, even H doesn't turn me into a fucked up looking drooling space cadet, seriously, I can get away with H (snorted) in social situations like meals out, work, pub, talking to family members and nobody seems to bat an eyelid - I abuse benzos and who the fuck knows what's in store, for me and the people around me.
I've said it before, I stopped taking them months ago and had a wee blip there before going on holiday, but seriously this time I've had enough. Those fuckers are the devils work.
For real, I've done a lot of drugs and been in some states in the past but nothing beats the searing, clinging embarrassment of an RC benzo blackout. People have asked on occasion since I got off them what benzos feel like and honestly, past my experiences with therapeutic prescribed doses with no tolerance, I can't tell them. I'm sure my parents, close friends, and former housemates could, but I can't. I wish I could take em every now and then but nah. Not worth the risk.
Word man. Nothing more horrific and dangerous than a benzo blackout. At least when I'm pissed blackout people know you're pissed, even if you horribly embarrass yourself, they may laugh and sneer but at least they know the cause. With benzos people just think you're a lunatic (not in a funny 'mad bastard' way, an actual fucking lunatic) and I put myself in more dangerous situations because I think somewhere in the depths of my utterly warped mind at the time that I'm okay. To be honest, I'm surprised I'm not dead.
Not meaning to sound like preachy or anything in the general context of the thread, though. I fully envy people who can take or leave benzos