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Methadone withdrawal day 23...

Aw man, Lynn - Im sorry you are going through this. I have gone through WDs with a little one around too and it SUUUUCCCCCKKKS.

The exercise thing is truth - just getting out in the sun and walking around the block worked for me in the beginning. If anything it makes you feel PART of the world again instead of on the outside looking it. It can do wonders for your mindset. Hearing birds, seeing blue sky, etc...I sound like a total hippie but trust me, it helps! :)

Also - I found that being dehydrated really messed my world up. Try to drink lots of juice and stuff.

Also - did you ever get clonidine? If you still can, it may be worth it, i took one a day for the first month of my recovery, just because it helped calm me down a wee bit.

Good luck! You're totally doing it!
 
Toothpastedog, thank you for the encouragement!! This has definitely been the hardest thing my body has gone through- and its gone through quite a bit lol. Today was a bad day physically but I think it has a lot to do with malnourishment and anemia. I got so cold today (no fever) and couldn't feel my feet or the tips of my fingers. I wasn't able to keep anything down the past 3 days but I managed to take a multivitamin and an iron supplement with an ensure- it felt like death on my stomach. I actually called my mom (she's a lab tech) because I had shortness of breath and chest pain so I kinda thought I was dying- luckily I wasn't. I look pretty rough- dark circles under my eyes but I'm sure some of it is withdrawals.. Bad timing for anemia to show up ha. I think I'm on day 20.. It's been hard keeping track of time but I know this will pass. Mentally I'm pretty great and I hope it lasts. I can't waste time focusing on how my body feels- its not worth it. It's just trying its best to heal itself! I'll definitely try the yoga- I look forward to it.

Dognasher you are too sweet! Unfortunately, we are in a flash flood crisis where I live right now or else I'd be happy to be outside. I need vitamin d bad! Lol oh and I know I HAVE to be dehydrated. Did you ever have trouble keeping liquids- or anything for that matter- down? I tried zofran but unfortunately it just didn't help me. My family is freaking out more than I am really. I'm pretty sure I've gone longer than this with less food back in high school and survived. Oh well, I'll just see how tomorrow goes- it'll be 3 weeks! *fingers crossed* oh and no I didn't get clonodine. My daughter has to have tubes put in her ears and I just really don't have the extra money to see a doctor. My mom can run blood work for me but she can't write a prescription lol

Thank y'all for helping me along through this. I know I usually sound pretty positive, but it really is pure hell and I'm not sure I'd recommend it to anyone. I wish I could've just quit heroin in 4 days but oh well. This is my price to pay for abusing myself for 7 years.. Can't expect to get off without a nasty fight.
 
NSA, that's exactly what I've gained from this whole experience. Even though I don't have much control over what my body is doing, I do have control over how I react to it emotionally. Feelings can really make or break you. I've really learned to decide to be positive and happy. That IS what I can control. This honestly really really sucks but I'm really becoming a stronger person because of it.
 
Lynn8514 said:
I got so cold today (no fever) and couldn't feel my feet or the tips of my fingers... Can't expect to get off without a nasty fight.
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During my w/drawl I actually nearly fell through, and broke 2 windows in approx 2 weeks, because my feet were numb, and legs just didn't follow comands. Just stumbled in to them, they weren't sturdy enough to hold up my 230lb bulk on the fly. Big old plate glass windows, lucky I didn't hurt myself.
Well...3 windows if ya count the 1 in the door I punched in when I locked myself out.
$$$$

Try epson salt baths when you get real cold and stiff

{My thoughts on NA/AA~ can be a great place, can also be very negative and glorify drug use- "war stories" -can also be extremely judgmental, and hurtful to recovery. Example: a friend had quit heroin, had an awesome NA group for 1.5yrs, then was ostracized when his sponsor found out he had been on suboxone, though the group was discussing 'scripts that help recovery.
If you are ready to stop ALL drug/alcohol use FOREVER, and admit you are powerless and must rely on another- sponsor, groups, and higher power, than it is a great fit}

I think you're an incredibly strong person, most give in, decide to try again later when things get better for them...
 
ScuicidalNod said:
During my w/drawl I actually nearly fell through, and broke 2 windows in approx 2 weeks, because my feet were numb, and legs just didn't follow comands. Just stumbled in to them, they weren't sturdy enough to hold up my 230lb bulk on the fly. Big old plate glass windows, lucky I didn't hurt myself.
Well...3 windows if ya count the 1 in the door I punched in when I locked myself out.
$$$$

Try epson salt baths when you get real cold and stiff

{My thoughts on NA/AA~ can be a great place, can also be very negative and glorify drug use- "war stories" -can also be extremely judgmental, and hurtful to recovery. Example: a friend had quit heroin, had an awesome NA group for 1.5yrs, then was ostracized when his sponsor found out he had been on suboxone, though the group was discussing 'scripts that help recovery.
If you are ready to stop ALL drug/alcohol use FOREVER, and admit you are powerless and must rely on another- sponsor, groups, and higher power, than it is a great fit}

I think you're an incredibly strong person, most give in, decide to try again later when things get better for them...
Click to expand...

Your feet got numb too? Ugh they are still doing it and I do stumble and fall all the time. You kinda need to feel your feet when you walk lol. Did the Epsom salt help the numbness? It's driving me crazy.

Today is day 21-3weeks and last night was the worst night physically that I've had. Gabas used to put me to sleep but they aren't working anymore so I'm exhausted but restless. Beyond annoying. I've pretty much gotten used to these withdrawals and accepted them but now I've developed severe back pain. I mean like moan out loud every time I move pain. My back used to hurt a little before I started drugs (mild scoliosis and mild slipped disk) but this pain in like... Fucking OWWW.
Someone please tell me this will ease off. It has to.

As for NA, I might give them another shot... Still not sure yet. I really want another chip haha. I can't quit now after all this! I will never repeat this process again. Hell-fucking-no. I get it- heroin sucks ass. I take Adderall and I can't quit. I won't, I have narcolepsy so.. I don't have an issue with it so I probably will just never mention it if I start going.

ughh someone please tell me this back pain is temporary!!! This is crazyyyy.
 
I get really bad back pain when I am in withdrawal so I think it will probably pass for you eventually. But there is that shitty possibility that the opiates where masking damage from your prior problems. Are you taking ibuprofen? that will help the pain.
 
I know that possibility is freaking me out. There's no way. I would've felt it when I got down to 3mg. I would've HAD to. I'm taking 800mg ibuprofen... But it's just not getting it.
 
Pupils are messed up?!

So it's been over 3 weeks since I've had any opioids. I know pupils get huge during withdrawal. Mine were bigger like a few weeks ago but now they are so huge it looks like I'm rollin on x. After 3 weeks? I don't even feel bad today. They are so big it's embarrassing- it's very noticeable. You have to really look to even see the tiny ring of color.
On top of that, they aren't even the same size. One is noticeably bigger. I've got a killer headache too. It just seems weird to me.. I don't like the unevenness.
 
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Lynn8514 said:
So it's been over 3 weeks since I've had any opioids. I know pupils get huge during withdrawal. Mine were bigger like a few weeks ago but now they are so huge it looks like I'm rollin on x. After 3 weeks? I don't even feel bad today. They are so big it's embarrassing- it's very noticeable. You have to really look to even see the tiny ring of color.
On top of that, they aren't even the same size. One is noticeably bigger. I've got a killer headache too. It just seems weird to me.. I don't like the unevenness.
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I am glad you are physically feeling better! It sounds like you have made a big improvement over the last couple days. The enlarged pupils are just another symptom of withdrawal that will come and go. You can pretty much expect many of the symptoms to randomly appear and disappear as you enter the post acute stage. I looked up the uneven pupil thing on Web Md and it said the headaches are most likely stress related. Well either that or your having a brain aneurism lol.
 
crimsonjunk said:
I looked up the uneven pupil thing on Web Md and it said the headaches are most likely stress related. Well either that or your having a brain aneurism lol.
Click to expand...

Ugh I read that too. The scary thing is, I've suspected an aneurysm the past few months but haven't actually gone to see. All the damage I've done to my veins it wouldn't surprise me.
 
It's day 23 and I have my appetite back, but now I have the worst RLS no matter what I take and haven't slept the past 3 days. Before now, I had been able to sleep with gabapentin and benzos but they've suddenly just stopped working. I'm also now sneezing like crazy and have this weird chest anxiety or something. I'm not good when I don't sleep. Lyrica isn't working either. Is there anything else for the RLS or at least to sleep before I lose my mind? I've been very positive through this entire thing but without sleep I can't think right.
 
Hey Lynn.. I was astonished you were able to sleep before. Methadone has an very individual determined half life. You may have a pretty long one.

What dose of gaba are you taking and how many times a day.

Hang in there<3<3<3
 
Could I seriously have a half life that long after quitting at only 3 mg? Ughh.
I think I was probably up to taking 1 in the morning, 1 or 2 at lunch and 2 at night. They are 600mg each.. They have started messing with my moods too.. That what lyrica did too. I can't really afford any extra negative depressing thoughts to fight off.

as the night goes on, I'm only getting worse- everything back at full force. No eating, chills, shaking, terrible rls that's not only in my leg but like in my arm and chest I think. My pupils are huge- I have blue eyes and you can't see the blue without squinting and honestly, my eyeballs hurt! It's probably from the light but ugh. I'm tired!

i could really use some encouragement. My mind is still set but if this continues I'm not sure what I'll do. No sleep makes me someone else.
 
You're doing great.
This shit storm comes in waves.
You'll most likely get a break in another day or 3.
Try hot showers, and finish off warm to cool so you don't end up all sweaty and need a repeat.
If you can find fresh Lavender, steep in bioling water 20 min, and inhale (not drink) the steam from the cup as it cools. Dried will work too, but you need more. Add some mint for the headache and chest pain. Mint tea, solominte, is great.
Eat some carrots and red/orange bell peppers for the eyes.

Lyrica is converted to Gabapentin in the liver. Approx. 125mg Lyrica=600mg Gabapentin. 3800mg a day is toxic doses for gaba. It can cause nasty issues well before toxic doses- blurred vision, tremorrors, headache, dizziness. You really need to find a sweet spot w/ those drugs.

Only other things I could suggest for Zzzz would be clonidine, or sleep aids('scrpts). Or maybe some Nyquil if benadryl etc. works for you.
Be well...

Oh, smoke weed. Eat weed. I hit the hash pretty hard when I couldn't sleep for a MONTH
 
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