The 4 Stages of Being a Tool Fan

SpunkySkunk347

SpunkySkunk347

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Stage 1 - Over-listening of singles:
As a new fan of the band, an individual can be identified as being in this stage by their listening of the songs 'Sober' and 'Schism' on 24 hour repeat. Candidates for becoming Tool fans are usually males in their late teens and early 20s who frequently take psychedelics and smoke pot.

Stage 2 - Snobby Pseudo-intellectualism:
Individuals in this stage will often point out to their friends "Dude did you know the song Lateralus has Fibonacci sequences in it?" and other obscure facts which, to them, prove that Tool is much more complex and artistic than any other band. Always ready to point out how advanced Tool's time signatures are, without necessarily knowing exactly what a 'time signature' even is.

Stage 3 - Maynard Worship:
This stage is characterized by the studying of Maynard James Keenan's lyrics as if they were Biblical scripture. Their appreciation of the band and Maynard in particular has crossed over into complete obsession.


Stage 4 - Maynard Rejection:
By this time, the fan has become sick of Maynard, and started to realize that the guy himself is actually a little bit whack-o. The fan finally appreciates the band for what they should, for the music and the instrumental ability of the band. Also, it becomes apparent that Maynard is the reason the band hasn't come out with any new albums in the past 9 years, which adds to the Maynard-hate.
 
i like tool. some songs are cool. i cant say ive ever been in any one of these phases tho.
 
Stage 69: That Opiate was the best damn thing they released, with Undertow coming in a distant 2nd. And Paul D'amour was the best bassist they ever had. Pretty much don't listen to them anymore.
 
jpgrdnr said:
Stage 69: That Opiate was the best damn thing they released, with Undertow coming in a distant 2nd. And Paul D'amour was the best bassist they ever had. Pretty much don't listen to them anymore.
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get that bob marley wanna be motherfucker out of here
 
Hmmm interesting. I guess I am a stage 4 Tool fan. I have never been obsessed with Maynard nor have I ever been sickened by him. I don't think I ever will be as I have been listening to the band for almost a decade now. Tool will always be one of my favorite bands, and I really love A Perfect Circle too. Good quality music. Brilliant sound and profound lyrics.
 
Is Maynard really the reason behind the long wait? What are you basing this off of?

(I'm actually quite ignorant of what's going on behind-the-scenes of the band.... I 'm honestly just curious if that claim holds any water, thanks.)
 
Any of you guys like Maynard with perfect circle I couldn't get enough. They opened for NIN and they blew Trent off the stage. But getting back to the subject Tool is another one of those bands where every song is incredible and each one in the band are incredible musicians. Prison sex is awesome song,Musik,thier remake of no quarter(favorite zep song) is fucking awesome,I love em all. I'm stage 4 fan still, but dude was right about D'Amour he is so taented and irreplaceable!
 
Tool was pretty cool when I was 16ish, tbh. I remember taking a class with super advanced at the time video editing software and shit and making a super edgy video about suicide and shit set to this, but yeah, I dunno, not my thing these days. Lachrymology? And I dunno, if I'm going to take drugs, it's gonna be to the Dead, yeah. But I'll always regard Tool with a certain nostalgia, I appreciate the artistry, but it's not my sound and definitely not my scene. While ibid., or something like Lateralus, Schism, and I think this song in particular has a laudable message to my friends on the West Coast :p, so yeah, their music is something I can to this day appreciate, so much of the scene is about pseudointellectualizing drug experiences and overall edginess, so yeah, not for me. That they saw fit to put Alex Gray on their cover art is a big minus in my book.
 
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^I never really like Tool when I was younger. I thought they were too soft, because they so often got described as metal, and metal to me was pretty much extreme/black metal :\. I actually started properly listening to Tool about 2 years ago (I am 320 and now find quite a lot to enjoy in them. I feel like their sound is quite dated, and I don't really appreciate any of the angst of the lyrics, but their instrument use, production and actual song construction is impressive.

It was my interest in ambient that got me to go back to them, when I listened to remixes that Lustmord did for them. Interesting combination of sounds/styles that doesn't always work, but Lustmord really never fails to me.

Schism Remix
 
I've never been the type of person to look up facts on any bands, and haven't with TOOL, i just really enjoyed their music, as a whole. I don't know what stage i am in . They didn't release a new album because maynard needs to get his vocals in there (i heard), but primarily because of a lawsuit.
 
Im at the stage where I fucking love Tool for life:p hope the next album, assuming it ever does actually come out, is better than 10000 days, least favorite of mine. I think alot has to do with Maynard, doin puscifer and makin wine and so on....theyre all getting older and I assume this will be the last album. Theyre playin a halloween concert with primus
 
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Made me laugh too. Pretty spot on, it's been a decade between Albums, this year is the first year that I couldn't care less. The Beatles had started and were onto solo albums after a decade. I know they have some Court cases but so do lots of people. Either happy enough with career or writers block?
I was wondering where new could they go? Acoustic focus seems about it and I can't see that happening. Adam Jones though seems to be able write good riffs under water in odd meter and drop D so...
Last album was a disappointment save three songs so...
Meh, fuck Tool now
 
This made me laugh because one of my best friends is a huge Tool...fan. He laments the lack of output but loves to talk about why "Danny Carey is the greatest drummer of all time" : )
 
RDP89 said:
Theyre playin a halloween concert with primus
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Im pretty depressed that i wont be able to go to this.

Also, at first it said that deftones was going to play with them, now it doesn't. I personally would Iove to see "passenger" live. It doesn't matter anyways though, im nowhere near arizona sadly. =/
 
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