I Just Can't Put Down The Needle (literally, 18 months clean, 2 years good behavior)

[m060mm]

So I started shooting suboxone when I transitioned because it was more familiar. Cut to two years later and I still feel the need to inject something, at least morning at night.. hourly urges at worst. Even if it's water, or super-watered down suboxone.

Any advice on how to break this highly addictive habit? I have access to suboxone so this is literally just me coming off of 'needles'.

Anecdotes welcome, straight up instructions equally helpful.

(This is compromising my living situation so I'm committed, it's just that willpower alone hasn't been enough in the past, with syringes being so readily available, even if you're broke [I'm in a major metropolitan area])

Thank you all in advance.

 

[Ds]

You could try tying off like your going to do a shot while laying on your side, and instead of sticking a needle in your arm you could just plug some suboxone. Where you have to lay on your side for 10-20minutes, you feel a nice opiate/suboxone high after like 5minutes. Maybe then you will be in an awkward position and will already have kinda stuck a syringe else where rather your arm.

That rig is bad news bears.

 

[m060mm]

Yeah my first reaction was 'plug it' seeing I hate the feeling /taste in my mouth anyway.

Thanks, I think I'll do that. In the past though, that hasn't been enough to get me to forget about needles.

 

[m060mm]

Sorry for the double, I'm on a tablet. The downside to plugging is you need at least 200% versus injection. But given what my circumstance is like, I suppose I can burn through them a little quicker for a while.

 

[Ds]

hey man its better then sticking your self and hurting them arms!

 

[SKR]

The novelty of needle use is bizarre really. I had this issue in my late teens when I first started shooting up. Me and my mates would try to get anything in a needle which is not uncommon amongst users apparently. I don't really know what to suggest to try and help you kick the habit - for me I just gave up hard drugs which meant no more needle but you are on a maintenance program I think (Have I understood properly?) so your still going to be using. I also wanted to be able to wear short sleeves again and not have obvious lumps/bumps tracks etc. Maybe if you started lifting weights and want to show off your arms this might discourage using needles? I dunno man but I hope you get over it, cos it sucks.

 

[Captain.Heroin]

So I started shooting suboxone when I transitioned because it was more familiar. Cut to two years later and I still feel the need to inject something, at least morning at night.. hourly urges at worst. Even if it's water, or super-watered down suboxone.

Any advice on how to break this highly addictive habit? I have access to suboxone so this is literally just me coming off of 'needles'.

Anecdotes welcome, straight up instructions equally helpful.

(This is compromising my living situation so I'm committed, it's just that willpower alone hasn't been enough in the past, with syringes being so readily available, even if you're broke [I'm in a major metropolitan area])

Thank you all in advance.

you have to just stop shooting up

you should get rid of any drugs that can be injected

if I had any IV-able drugs, that were worth doing, I'd probably do it that way

which is why I only have shatter, alcohol, salvia, caffeine on hand. those are the only drugs I do.

6 and 3/4th months without any IV drug use, and I'm still having dreams about shooting up. My brain is still obsessed.

 

[SKR]

^No needles for almost 10 years for me, the dreams stopped about 3 years ago so they lasted close to 7 years. I had the dreams while I was using too and this would often prompt my use for that day. Junkie Brain.

 

[Captain.Heroin]

^No needles for almost 10 years for me, the dreams stopped about 3 years ago so they lasted close to 7 years. I had the dreams while I was using too and this would often prompt my use for that day. Junkie Brain.

thanks for sharing your story man. this helps me, because I desperately want to believe the dreams will stop one day.

 

[Captain.Heroin]

the other piece of advice I should give you

is that you need to give yourself permission, or an allowance, to feel miserable

I've gone over why our society is too fixated on happiness and maintaining a constant state of it, how this is detrimental to our mental health and well being in general, etc.

I don't want to type more about it right now, but if you're curious as to why I believe this, just ask.

 

[SKR]

thanks for sharing your story man. this helps me, because I desperately want to believe the dreams will stop one day.

You're welcome, I'm glad the info helped you.

I was the same, I had no idea if the dreams would stop. They just became a lot less frequent over the years. I would only have maybe 2 dreams per year in the last 2 - 3 years I was having them. In these dreams I was never able to actually have a shot. I would be frantically mixing my gear in a bag or going through hell trying to find a needle and there would always be an issue like the needle would be bent or broken in some way or blocked. I have only ever successfully had a shot in a dream maybe once or twice from memory and I would feel the rush then wake up. When I couldn't have a shot in a dream, which was almost always, I would wake up frustrated and the thought of using would be on my mind for a few hours of that day. It was torture. But I don't have them now thankfully. The dreams do stop!

 

[Captain.Heroin]

the weird thing is my dreams are about obtaining and shooting methamphetamine

the drug i had a problem with was buprenorphine (before that heroin)...

to me, it seems the dreams are a manifestation of subconscious needle obsession.

 

[Spideronthewall]

Needle Dreams are the worst part. I find myself waking up, and getting up to use before i go back to bed to remember I'm sober, not nearly as far along as you guys.