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☮ Social ☮ PD Social Thread: Engage the digital super banana

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My mood is definitely affected by the weather (unless I have some MXE in which case its always sunny and nothing will get between me and my bliss). This morning it is clear, sunny, 50 degrees, the birds are singing and the flowers are blooming. Feelsgoodman. Thickly overcast weather really puts a damper on my vibes and general outlook. Life is deeply tied to its environment. PDs have probably increased my sensitivity to environment.
 
Thorns Have Roses said:
I promenaded at dusk, it was quite warm, with a cool breeze, then I sat on a bench smoking my pipe (got a new one a couple days ago, my cigarette habit is way too expensive and it worsens my anxiety, I'm gonna try to wean myself off'em), listening to the crickets chirp; I was uncharacteristically relaxed. Which leads me to the question, to what degree does the weather affect your mood, my fellow PD socialites?
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Yeah the weather/climate absolutely affects my mood... I have a hard time in the winter (though this winter wasn't bad), due to the cold and lack of light. When it's rainy all day it bums me out too. I feel the best every time it's a beautiful, warm, sunny day.
 
Are we neighbors, its overcast and in the 60s. Few more days back to high 80s and then 100 degree summer. Woooo.

I recently started working outside
sometimes its hot and irritating, but I think overall I feel better about myself for it.

Smoked weed for the first time in a few years. Wasn't as high as I thought I would be. Smoked co2 oil... Amazing how such a tony amount got me high as fuck. Not like for time ever stupid high like I was expecting. Kinda glad that didn't happen .
 
Not a single cloud in the sky today, it got pretty chilly last night but now it's right above 70 degrees. I'm going to see if my friend wants to play disc golf this evening.
 
PD, surely y'all must understand the desire to not exist. Tell me I should exist.


It's not that I'm off my rocker.
It's that I've lost my religion.
 
240sxLover said:
PD, surely y'all must understand the desire to not exist. Tell me I should exist.


It's not that I'm off my rocker.
It's that I've lost my religion.
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fortunatly/unfortunatly you will continue to "exist" whether your current body is alive or not. Wherever you go there will be existance.

That being said, I wish terribly to not exist sometimes. A big reason for my current body still existing is the fear of making things even worse if I exited it prematurely.
 
Gasolina is among the hypest joints to ever drop.
Trozz.
listen to gasolina.
shit is HOT son even if you dont speak spanish.
 
Worst song on the face of the planet. I'm only half kidding too. It's seriously BAD. BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD. (I'm assuming we're talking about the same "Gasolina" song from YEARS back, yeah?).

hahaha sorry if that wasn't the response you were expecting/hoping for :P
 
Mane dog.
You just havent been around any puerto ricans that you aint like gasolina
its a hot joint
science experiment.
amphetamine doesnt produce as strong of a run really fast effect as methamphetamine.
that and im getting fatter, that doesnt help.
 
^I know you guys have probably heard this a million times but a good hobby does wonders for depression. I'm finally been off mxe for a week or so and I really am so much happier. Since mxe got me kicmed out of my band I have been training for the state college boxing team for next year. I have only been off of mxe for like 4 days but have been training for a month before I quit mxe.

I've gained 10 pounds of straight muscle (140 to 150) in the last month and knocked out(down and dazed) my 180 pound sparring partner twice. I promise I'm not bragging I'm just really excited and don't have many IRl friends to share with. Many apologies
 
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That's great to hear man, share away! We're always happy to hear about other people's advancements and positive changes in life...and the negatives too, of course. Here to listen and all that :)
 
240sxlover said:
PD, surely y'all must understand the desire to not exist. Tell me I should exist.
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I feel like that for periods of time daily. It trips me out, it scares me. It worries me. Today I had several 'peak' experiences of blended anxiety/epiphany, which are kinda exhilarating but also unsettling. I have to remind myself that I am safe and not going to fly apart; its like a mini-panic attack with no panic or panic symptoms besides the increase thought-load :/. Actually writing that sounds fuckin nuts really.

But I've concluded that maybe existence is completely formless, with no directive or purpose or goal and no right or wrong way to do it. If its not really possible to fail or lose but we still feel at times like we have failed, it must be because we've invented the idea of failure. That means that perhaps we can 'invent' greater ideas of respect, justice, happiness, goodness, and so forth. :)

Don't know if it makes sense or means anything. Its not what I wanted to say, I cannot find the words for that.
 
Yall crackas cray.
i needs mo amp mane.
srsly just one day is no fun, esp when as it is, i couldnt dose as high as id want to if i had a good amount.
i have no idea why right, i stay off 3 weeks, and i get decent not even expecting to. Im surprised that right now i am not straight disgruntled, the way stimulants normally make me when i cant be alone/unbothered/lay around all day the day after being up all night and still being wide awake and shit.
we will see. Ive got another 40, that will go up my nose to get me through work.
i got really depressing news last night, and that hasnt like hit me yet.
Fuckin hell though. I cant stand this nonsmoking world mane. The last time i used stimulants i was smoking 2 packs a day the entire time i was up, because i was outside a lot and the places i was inside i could smoke in...
letssnortthelastofitiguess.
Its just depressing when you have to hold back using amphetamines or related drogery due to supply. Like im THIS CLOSE but i cant take more to get the state i desire.
 
LSDMDMA&AMP said:
Yall crackas cray.
i needs mo amp mane.
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I don't think we're the only ones hahah.


I try to find hobbies, but I have so much trouble finding things that entertain me any more. My biggest interests are generally cars and my snake, but I can only hold my snake occasionally right now since she's a juvenile, and I can't bloody afford a car for the next five years or so I assume. So I need something else. I know I should start exercising. I have so much pent up anger at the world, and part of it stems from feeling weak and helpless. Maybe if I was buff I'd feel less angry since I would know I have the power to destroy things -_-

I did some MXE last night for some reason ( I still can't understand why) and it was different from other MXE experiences I've had. I spent the whole trip laying on my couch listening to classical music and having intense thoughts surrounding suicide and sadness and my failures in life and got the intense feeling that I was indeed about to jump out of my skin, that something in the universe had broken and the universe itself was now faulty... or something. It was really weird, and now that I'm awake this morning I'm glad I didn't decide to do anything irrational to try and "fix" the universe or anything...

Nonetheless, I feel like I'm coming to some impasse where... I don't know... Things feel wrong still. I can't put my finger on it, but I don't think contentment in life is possible for me.
 
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