nuttynutskin
Bluelighter
- Joined
- May 15, 2011
- Messages
- 10,755
When I was a teenager in high school I was pretty much a pot and acid head. I drank also, but it wasn't my drug of choice or I at least didn't prefer it over the others. But sometime after high school weed no longer appealed to me that much. I would get paranoid or just generally feel weird after smoking. As far as psychedelics, that phase was definitely over because I got so burned out on acid in high school, and was afraid of getting caught with it being legal age (call me a pussy but I didn't want a potential felony). So somewhere in my twenties I had pretty much given up drugs and binge drinking like I did in high school but would drink socially basically and I had no problem with it. I liked drinking but I also had other things in my life going for me.
Somewhere in between that time things sort of started going downhill. College didn't work out, I wasn't good at trying to maintain jobs, my social life sucked, etc. My drinking still was pretty much under control tho because, well, I was broke most of the time. Fast forward to maybe 4 years ago my drinking had picked up but mostly to maybe 2 cans of malt liquor whenever I could afford it, or a bottle of wine 3 days a week or so. I was depressed about a lot of stuff but again I just didn't have the money to drink a whole lot. A little time after that some circumstances changed for me in a good way (sort of) and I had money. All of the sudden all I had to do was pay rent basically and I could party and afford the good stuff. At the time I'm sure I lied to myself and said I would just have some fun for a month or so and then settle down on the drinking, but that didn't exactly happen.
Soon I was drinking more as my tolerance went up and what started out as something that helped my depression and anxiety was now actually contributing to it. Doing and saying stupid things that I regret and whatnot. After a while it was taking a toll but being in that state I guess you don't really see it. So to try to not turn this into a full blown novel, basically for the last 3 years I've been battling with alcoholism. Not drinking all of that time but probably a good part of it.
So I guess my question is, do people that suffer from depression or bipolar disorder have a predisposition for alcohol and maybe not other drugs? I guess alcohol pretty much hits the frontal cortex of the brain but I haven't really done any research about other drugs. I wish weed had become my drug of choice honestly, but for whatever reason as my bipolar depression increased my desire for other drugs went out the window.
TLDR:
Binge drank and did drugs in high school.
After high school quit doing drugs but drank socially. Had other things going in life and was in control.
Life shit happened, eventually depression worsened, but still didn't drink all that heavily because of being poor.
Circumstances changed and I had money and could afford to drink more.
Began drinking more and fairly quickly became an alcoholic facing the problems associated with it.
Somewhere in between that time things sort of started going downhill. College didn't work out, I wasn't good at trying to maintain jobs, my social life sucked, etc. My drinking still was pretty much under control tho because, well, I was broke most of the time. Fast forward to maybe 4 years ago my drinking had picked up but mostly to maybe 2 cans of malt liquor whenever I could afford it, or a bottle of wine 3 days a week or so. I was depressed about a lot of stuff but again I just didn't have the money to drink a whole lot. A little time after that some circumstances changed for me in a good way (sort of) and I had money. All of the sudden all I had to do was pay rent basically and I could party and afford the good stuff. At the time I'm sure I lied to myself and said I would just have some fun for a month or so and then settle down on the drinking, but that didn't exactly happen.
Soon I was drinking more as my tolerance went up and what started out as something that helped my depression and anxiety was now actually contributing to it. Doing and saying stupid things that I regret and whatnot. After a while it was taking a toll but being in that state I guess you don't really see it. So to try to not turn this into a full blown novel, basically for the last 3 years I've been battling with alcoholism. Not drinking all of that time but probably a good part of it.
So I guess my question is, do people that suffer from depression or bipolar disorder have a predisposition for alcohol and maybe not other drugs? I guess alcohol pretty much hits the frontal cortex of the brain but I haven't really done any research about other drugs. I wish weed had become my drug of choice honestly, but for whatever reason as my bipolar depression increased my desire for other drugs went out the window.
TLDR:
Binge drank and did drugs in high school.
After high school quit doing drugs but drank socially. Had other things going in life and was in control.
Life shit happened, eventually depression worsened, but still didn't drink all that heavily because of being poor.
Circumstances changed and I had money and could afford to drink more.
Began drinking more and fairly quickly became an alcoholic facing the problems associated with it.
