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  • EADD Moderators: Shambles

Gibberings CLXXXVII - Feeling Funky (monkey)

checking back over the thread - I did post a few off topic and NSFW posts (FUBAR) made me -I have removed them.
 
Kota said:
It took me until this past month to realize how sharply my life has declined over the past three years. I was a "gifted child", but, after those three years, I'm a practically retarded adult. I was in denial about my drop in mental dexterity, even ignoring inability to multiply simple numbers or tell analogue time, until this year's prelim exams. A few days ago, I was told I got 41% in chemistry. Today I learned I got 39% in biology.

My family and teachers are beginning to accept that I won't get the grades I need for GU pharmacology. They're suggesting I do an Open University course next year and get into uni through it. I don't like the idea. I'm too tired.

I wish I'd chosen subjects and a career goal that I'm good at. Pharmacology is my big interest, and I've read a lot about it, but my memory isn't good enough to cough up high school chemistry. I'm good at the liberal arts: English, philosophy, art, politics... I'm no good at the STEM subjects. I thought I could learn to be good at them, but I don't have the intelligence.
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Just read this. So sorry to read you using words like 'retarded' when you're most certainly not.

I can understand your disappointment, but the fact is that you've been through so much that it's astounding that you still have the drive and ambition to feel that disappointment.

I know I can't say anything that will change this, but please realise that you have massive potential even if it means deviating from the path you'd previously chosen, and nothing you do will be of any less worth than what you aspired to.

Take care, you. <3
 
@kota, it will be better once you get off the benzos. Yes, benzos affect your memory; but mainly the transfer from short- to long-term storage. You are unlikely to have forgotten anything you already knew before you started taking the things. And the gaps will fill themselves in with a bit of revision.

Things are never as bad as you think they are. Hang in there. You'll be fine if you've a sympathetic GP -- and if not, there are some smart people on Bluelight. Sure, words from strangers on the Internet are no substitute for a properly planned, medically supervised taper programme -- but if they're all you've got, they're better than stopping suddenly and making yourself worse / risking death.
 
Kota - don't be so hard on yourself. You didn't get the grades people expected, there telling you that one extra year will help - once you get yourself sorted out that year will fly past.
 
I woke up in a need of water and a painkiller :o

@Kota - I could talk about my academic failures for ages, times are hard when you are failing.
Try some Ritalin few days before your exams.:) Or just get bad things out of your head, get clean and get the will to learn. Time off will help. You're a smart person, don't give up.

birthday girl gets my moms lasagna today, awwwwyeahhh=D
 
Sorry but EADD always needs SHM!!! That boy is a legend and a true gent! Still don't know why he got banned because I don't ask of these things. I don't want to know.


Bear, thankfully I was occupying Shambles. That was way more fun!!!!
 
Oh I best not say else I'll find myself infracted myself lol. I remember coming back off my one month ban. He personally PMd me to congratulate me on catching up to him in the banning stakes n warned me to be careful. Was just having a read now.

I better go check out his blog later n put a comment on it.

Evey
 
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