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Female virgin seeking advice

A

ANT_ally

Greenlighter
Joined
Dec 21, 2014
Messages
2
So, I'm 15 and my boyfriend is 17. I am still a virgin and was honestly planning on staying one for a while until my boyfriend of 6 months recently started bringing up sex a lot in our conversations. He mentions it at least two or three times a week now. He obviously wants it and, quite honestly, I do too. I told him and myself that I was going to wait until I was at least 16 but its gotten way too hard to resist. He said he would wait as long as he had to but I don't want to deprive him of sex. Is it too early? I know he has had more experienced partners before me which is quite intimidating. I really love him. We talk about our future together constantly and our love for each other is, without a doubt, real. A woman's advice would be really helpful but looking for a guy's point of view as well. Thanks in advance! :)
 
I'd go with only going ahead with it when YOU feel right about it. No BS about whether it is right or not, it is ENTIRELY up to you. If you feel pressured that is not a valid reason for letting yourself be coerced into it.

And you'd be surprised at how many times the 'giving in' view of things winds up with a split shortly after. Stick to how you feel, and don't worry about keeping him or what might happen because you say no. In spite of what he (or others) might say, a 17yo guy can survive with no sex.

And there are alternatives to make your relationship closer and give him and you pleasure that do not involve a hymen. :D
 
There are other things you can do besides sex. Blow jobs, oral, etc..... that's generally fun to try before sex. Make sure you are good with it before going ahead. Don't let anyone pressure you.
 
Choose what you want to do... Just know what (safe) sex is extremely fun, and that you most likely will not be in this current relationship for very long. There will be others.
 
Have you ever heard the term "bonding experience"?

When you do something really strenuous/difficult/pleasurable/meaningful/exciting --something intense -- with someone, you start to feel closer to them. This applies in all parts of life, not only dating, and with all sorts of activities, not only sex. It's something you've probably experienced before, with a roommate at summer camp or something like that.

Sex has an effect like that, except a whole fucking lot more. You will think and feel a lot of things you didn't expect to; everyone does, it comes with the territory. It happens whether or not you're fifteen, but some people don't think fifteen-year-olds can handle it, and, frankly, they're wrong. However, it is important, I think, to have a good social support network. Most fifteen-year-olds are not prepared to talk to their parents about their sex lives, so I should say, it is really important that there be some people who you could talk to, even though you probably won't want to, just because you might want to, and that kind of isolation really fucking blows.

There is only one thing that can really ruin your first time, which is simple: if it sucks/is painful/frightening. And this can happen at 23 as well as at 15. Suggestions: give each other head at least once before you try to have sex, cuddle, learn to have fun touching each other, etc, make sure that you have respect for each other/feel comfortable making the other person feel good/neither of you is going to try to act like a pornstar. Because, well, if you can do all that, you're most of the way to sex, really. Remember that you deserve caring and attention from your partner and likewise.

So I guess I'm the only 'yes' vote, but... consider yourself warned.
 
Well, it's your body, it's your pussy, you can do what you want to do. If you really feel like doing it, why not? you can also just start with petting and just relax together (I know how guys feel in these age though) - but if you have sex, use protection!

otherwise - I don't know you and the circumstances you live in. So perhaps it would be wise to talk to a good friend or someone you can trustfully call upon, if you are still unsure about it?
 
Only do it once you're sure you want to and are ready. That being said, I think losing one's virginity is something that is overblown as far as it's psychological impact. So long as the guy you're with isn't a total douche and having sex with him won't end up being a major regret, it's not THAT big of a deal and isn't something you'll be kicking yourself over if your bf turns out to not be the greatest guy in the world.

However, it's really best that you wait until you are sure you are ready to avoid any feelings of regret or even feelings of resentment towards your bf for possibly pressuring you into having sex before you are ready.
 
atara said:
So I guess I'm the only 'yes' vote, but... consider yourself warned.
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Not the only 'yes' but like most others you have a... 'consider this...' part of your qualified 'yes.'

And I should like to add, if she DOES say yes, make sure he spends plenty of time on foreplay - the best thing for a woman is to have a build up to the peak and that means some romance, some contact, some pleasure and THEN the sex. Guys are more about the "you said Yes? OK let's do it!"
 
yeah, for the young lads it's mostly "ok, you said Yes? okay, pants down, okay this thing has to go in this thing there, wait a moment, oops, eeerrrm - AAAH, first it has to get stiff" ...

I was young once...
 
go with the vibe and feel of it and be safe about it ! only you can prevent forest fires or some lame shit like that ! you only get to lose your virginity once ! so if you do make it awesome :)
 
When you want to do it for your own reasons, it's time. Never do it just because someone else wants it. You don't owe anyone sex. 17 year old boys naturally are gonna talk about and think about sex a lot, and that's fine. If he's pressuring you that's not fine. Don't pressure yourself either.

I don't want to be a dick but you're 15. This is very likely not your "one true love." Don't make decisions assuming that. It's not immoral to have sex with someone who isn't your "true love." There are, however, potential social and health consequences to consider. Be safe and be smart.
 
ParappaTheRapper said:
It would be a good idea to have one of those preface screens to verify age on bluelight like porn has. Maybe lower it to 16 or something.
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i never really felt bad for lying about my age when i watched porn under 18 and clicked "yes i am over 18", i don't think underage people interested in drugs would be fazed by that either.
 
Regardless of legality a two year difference isn't unethical or harmful under any circumstance.
 
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