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Alcoholism Discussion Thread Version 6.0

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omen_owen mk2 said:
17 days in is nothing, I'm not sure who led you to believe all would be fun and games once you got clean but it was serious misinformation. Life is better than using, but suddenly you have a whole wave of concerns and problems that weren't there when you were using. Things do gett better, but it takes time. The nature of life is that it's shitty as well as good, but 17 days in you're basically just consumed by all the shittyness from your using and your emotions will be all over the place. It takes hard work for things to get better, so don't think it's going to be handed to you on a plate, but if you do work and put the right action in things will get better.

Keep chipping away, keep being vigilant around your actions, keep thinking positive, keep working hard on your recovery and then things will get better. I would strongly suggest you stop listening to whoever suggested life was going to be a bed of roses as soon as you stopped using because they clearly haven't got a clue what they're talking about.

One love.
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I sound like a brat :\

I'm guessing it had something to do with it being late Friday night and my being sober. And that I'm possibly jealous of the people who say they feel clearer, have more energy, that life is better, though they earned that. And maybe jealous of the people who claim they were high functioning for years and got away with it, when I used to think of myself like that and now don't. It's bullshit really, feeling sorry for myself, it's just an excuse.
 
You don't sound like a brat at all! Get that thought out of your head now.:)

I just felt I needed to make it clear that if someone had told you things would be easy as soon as you got clean then it's pure bullshit. Unfortunately that's when the hard work really starts, the detox is ther easy bit in a way! Don't let that get you down though, things do get easier and the rewards can be immense.

It's perfectly normal to be feeling absolutely all over the shop at 17 days clean so try not to fret. Put the right action in and things will get easier in time though.
 
itchyscratchy said:
Yep, we might be not that far from each other I'm close to Randhurst mall. Bored was the term other people were using, for me it's more like disenchanted. I'm not sick of drinking per say, I'm sick of the instability that comes with it. And I'm sick of waiting for that next time shit snaps and I drnk again. Cause like I said earlier when I start I basically have to prepare to lose myjob, waste alot if not all of the money that I saved on dope and booze and other shit that I would not buy otherwise and so on. I basically have to hit the wall to stop. Its' kind of like a freight train, it's very slow picking up momentum but then it's hard to stop. Oh, the reason I resorted to drinking rubbing alcohol was because my g/f would hide my wallet to stop me and that's what was in the house. Yeah I know, sick. Worse than it sounds!
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You mention Randhurst mall and now I'm like wtf.....I also live near.....must be some vortex of sorts here causing alcoholism and such...maybe it's a depressing place? Think I should pack up and move to Colorado....
 
samm2 said:
You mention Randhurst mall and now I'm like wtf.....I also live near.....must be some vortex of sorts here causing alcoholism and such...maybe it's a depressing place? Think I should pack up and move to Colorado....
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HA! @ "vortex". I know from experience that for me "changing places, people and things"(like they tell you in recovery) has not really worked for me in the past when I wanted to get fucked up...Colorado still sells booze man. I have often felt like it's my surroundings that are causing me to drink and always thought if I ran away somewhere far away it would change. But you just wind up bringing the "vortex" with you. Sure, if you have less influences around you it's a little easier but at the end of the day, if you want to get fucked up, you will. I was house-sitting my fathers house in Arkansas, I walked 10 mil. to the liquor store(he's in a dry county) to get a bottle...then back. Imo, Randhurst area has got the least of a "vortex". You can't go anywhere unless you drive and then you risk a DUI. (went through it 3 years ago)But I don't like bars anyway anymore. I drink alone when I do...But I put a mirror in front of myself so I don't feel like a complete alcoholic.:)(you know what they say about drinking alone)
Later man.
Take care.
 
DAMN!! Nobody posted for a whole day?! Ppl. must be out getting hammered!...Or maybe I have no life!! HA!
DWE! Clear your mailbox pimp!
 
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I don't mean to bother, because I'm not addicted to alcohol but come to find out my boyfriend is. He is going to a rehab that is going to take six months to a year to complete and I want to be supportive. He is 24 and I am 20. My heart is broken and I feel so alone. I love him and I feel selfish for feeling this way. But I'm going to miss him so much. And I'm scared he might change as a person, instead of just overcoming his problem. But I have a few questions. Like will he be able to have a cell after a certain amount of time? is he going to be a completely different person? Are they gonna make him like zombiefied? Will his feelings change? I just want him to know I'm there every step of the way. My heart aches for him.
 
itchyscratchy said:
HA! @ "vortex". I know from experience that for me "changing places, people and things"(like they tell you in recovery) has not really worked for me in the past when I wanted to get fucked up...Colorado still sells booze man. I have often felt like it's my surroundings that are causing me to drink and always thought if I ran away somewhere far away it would change. But you just wind up bringing the "vortex" with you. Sure, if you have less influences around you it's a little easier but at the end of the day, if you want to get fucked up, you will. I was house-sitting my fathers house in Arkansas, I walked 10 mil. to the liquor store(he's in a dry county) to get a bottle...then back. Imo, Randhurst area has got the least of a "vortex". You can't go anywhere unless you drive and then you risk a DUI. (went through it 3 years ago)But I don't like bars anyway anymore. I drink alone when I do...But I put a mirror in front of myself so I don't feel like a complete alcoholic.:)(you know what they say about drinking alone)
Later man.
Take care.
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At some AA meetings some people have bashed weed and at least for me weed never caused cravjngs in me for it or alcohol.....which doesn't bother me none but the person that did the bashing was schizophrenic(treated with meds) and of course for her weed would not have been good.
 
robinmarie said:
I don't mean to bother, because I'm not addicted to alcohol but come to find out my boyfriend is. He is going to a rehab that is going to take six months to a year to complete and I want to be supportive. He is 24 and I am 20. My heart is broken and I feel so alone. I love him and I feel selfish for feeling this way. But I'm going to miss him so much. And I'm scared he might change as a person, instead of just overcoming his problem. But I have a few questions. Like will he be able to have a cell after a certain amount of time? is he going to be a completely different person? Are they gonna make him like zombiefied? Will his feelings change? I just want him to know I'm there every step of the way. My heart aches for him.
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That all depends on where he goes to rehab. No one can say whether his feelings for you will change, but it's almost certain that he will come out a very different person to the one whoo went in. If they makke him zombified then it's a shit rehab...but there are plenty of those about.
 
omen_owen mk2 said:
That all depends on where he goes to rehab. No one can say whether his feelings for you will change, but it's almost certain that he will come out a very different person to the one whoo went in. If they makke him zombified then it's a shit rehab...but there are plenty of those about.
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Imo, "the way" he comes out of rehab has everything to do with the foundation of the relationship. If it's based solely on both of you being together because you enjoyed getting fucked up together and that's the only thing you have in common, then yes, your relationship will suffer. A rehab is not a cult and they will not brainwash him. Also it has alot to do with reasons WHY he's going in. If he's going to get away from people that are triggers for him(you included[and he's serious])then he might reevaluate his relationships. But if what you are saying is true and you want to support him for him and not be his drunk buddy then you should be fine. Understand, his views might change abit but it's usually to strenghten the relationship...if the foundation was based on more than just drinking together.
Take care.
 
Been drinking since noon, but now it's time to sober up so I can wake up before dawn for a big-city business trip I'm completly unprepared for.
Gonna be a long week, but perhaps my travel-phobia will mean I lock myself in the hotel all week rather than hit the city bars. Never done something like this before and it's bad timing, but I have a lot of stuff I really need to be sober for thenext few weeks.
 
since noon...pfff focus on the stuff u have to do
SilverFeniks said:
Been drinking since noon, but now it's time to sober up so I can wake up before dawn for a big-city business trip I'm completly unprepared for.
Gonna be a long week, but perhaps my travel-phobia will mean I lock myself in the hotel all week rather than hit the city bars. Never done something like this before and it's bad timing, but I have a lot of stuff I really need to be sober for thenext few weeks.
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it's awkward when people come out of inpatient. they're much more reasonable; it takes a moment to realize. i'm sure that is absolutely always the case.

10 weeks yesterday. my friends' wedding was not easy. it was a fun night. after finding my resolve, i had a good time. i could've had a better time. i remember it.
 
/this is going to be a lifelong struggle

I am okay with imbibing. But, it seems going without for the rest of my life will be damn near impossible.

...still trying to get over the cravings hump.

Looking over this thread, it seems that may be impossible.

/feeling a little discouraged

:\
 
2 weeks clean and serene! Had a great visit home, hardly thought about drinking or using at all. I feel good today. Worked 21.5 hours in two days... have most of today off so that is nice.
 
Been awhile thought I'd check in. I remember getting all excited when my sweetie didn't drink for a day (save on glass of red) but usually its between 12-20 lager a day. He drinks more than I bring in a month for bills and food. making little sense.
realizing this isn't going to change.
Find myself hiding beers in the rafters or drinking them myself when his eyes go from light yellow to deep yellow and I see the change in personality, Jekyle to Hyde imminent. Drink them myself so he can't.
this is not good for me.
he told me when we first met he was a drinker. I respected that but had no idea just what to expect and frankly, i don't think i have what it takes to help him. i find myself packing little bags here and there so if 'shyte' hits the fan again, I can go camp in the park or find some shelter whilst i get back on my feet. my savings is gone, 'we' have drunk it. I have 3 a day, he has way more. my kidneys are hurting.
i love him
 
he was coming down the stairs so had to close up; he doesn't like that I come here for advice but have no one else to talk to about this. Don't share with parents or sister to protect him.
there is an al anon meeting but this town is small so again, want to protect him but maybe doing the opposite.

He seems to idolize his late Fathers drinking habit. Seems to have formed a bond with him through this. He misses his Dad and I wish his FAther was still alive so he could share with his son, who's now a man that drinking so much was a mistake and how he hopes his son won't make the same one.
I can almost feel his ghost in certain moments, upset that he never got a chance to.

What can I do? I wished to spend my life with him but almost each morning I wake up and get weepy over this. I feel myself being worn down and I begin to wonder, if he loves me so much like he says he does, why then is he so damn willing to bring me down with him?
Am I being selfish?
What do people do in this situation? He has never hit me when he's loaded, never hit me at all. but I have occasionally been afraid but not to the point of leaving. It's mostly being worn down that worries me. ACcepting his condition and putting myself at risk.
ah crikey, i don't know, he's coming back now have to go.
 
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