Put it this way, ive never caught my zip in it yet so it cant be exactly massive
Mine is nothing to shout home about but I suppose, why would you? Like your parents would care. That said, I have caught the old chap in the zip more than thrice in my life I'd think and once quite badly, so much so that I had to use a pair of pliers do disassemble the zip of my jeans. Much shallow-breathing and a frightful heart-rate I can assure you.
I also crashed my BMX one day a few years back and I smashed my willy right off the handlebar-clamp and then I landed in a bleeding heap about 15 feet in front of the bike. Annoyingly, it was a bunch of girls that came to my rescue. Mind you, They did get me an ambulance and offer me whiskey so not entirely bad in the scheme of things. On getting to the hospital it turned my bike was absolutely fine (I know this because the orderly had a look at it for me and said as much) but my fellow had kinda exploded. A&E didn't have a clue and when I tell you that I had everyone from the cleaners to the nurses to the security all had a goggle and offered their opinions, I was well past caring what size it was. I just wanted to know I was going to keep it....and not in a jar of formaldehyde either. Luckily for me, a plastic surgeon was in the building. He was called upon and when he took a look he said, defiantly I might add, "Not a problem...give me 2 minutes!" and off he went. On return he cradled my willy (a first for me by the way) in his hand, gave the gentlest wash and then set about gluingng it back together with Superglue 3. Told me not to have a tug for 3 weeks at least and best get a taxi with that bike of yours too. Not a problem really. I was black and blue from my knees to my ribs and when I thoughtfully and quite dutifully offered to show my willy to my brother for inspection, the poor guy nearlyly fainted with fright. So kids, learn a lesson. Give up BMXs way before you're in your 30s and take up something far less dangerous.
On the subject of vaginas, I thought I was obligated to give them some kind of oral attention and if it wasn't, I wasn't for caring. I think it's cracking fun (I'm sure there's a pun there) and to be perfectly honest, I've rarely met one that I didn't think was halfway clean. Seems to me it's one of those places that gets more attention than their faces half the time. 3-day old re-sculptedpted make-up is hardly unusual and barely mentionable but a dirty twat? Absolutely not.
